Tonight’s premiere of The Bachelorette Australia was filled with random dance numbers for no apparent reason, a first kiss, a cuddly lamb, a few fights and just a touch of ‘fake news’ from one particularly loud British dude. It was quite a show, we must say!
Our Bachelorette Ali Oetjen had her pick of the bunch, with 18 suitors showing up at Bachie mansion in a bid to find love with the blonde beauty.
Though it’s hard to unpack the magic of a premiere such as this, below we’ve got the 7 major thoughts that crossed our mind while watching the show.
1. Some SERIOUS drama is going to go down in the finale
Before the episode even began, before we had time to meet the suitors, fans were treated to a glimpse of the finale. Let’s just say things are looking rather heartbreaking.
In the finale, a concerned looking Osher Günsberg asks Ali, “Are you sure you’re making the right decision today?”
The scene then cuts to Ali with tears in her eyes, as one of the guys tells her ‘goodbye.’ What followed was a montage of heartbreaking scenes, with Ali hysterically crying as dramatic music plays.
Um, what on earth will this season’s finale have in store for us?! Hopefully Ali won’t find herself walking away single a la Nick Cummins.
Ali was shown crumbling to the ground after an emotional goodbye.
Ali was in hysterics in the emotional scene.
2. Charlie is (probably) not the winner
“What I’ve learned about love is to take it slower,” Ali told the camera at the beginning of the cocktail party, before meeting any of the guys. “The old Ali would have fallen in love with the first person who got out of that car. This time around I’m going to treat giving my heart to someone as something that is so much more precious to give.”
Enter Charlie. The first guy out of the car, Charlie makes an instant impression on our Bachelorette, and her voice over would have us believe she’s about to fall in love.
However, all this ‘prince Charming’ editing seems too good to be true! Plus, the ‘winner’ isn’t typically featured this heavily in the lead-up promos. We’ll have to wait and see how Charlie fares this season, but our money is on the hunky builder to be sent home around the top four mark.
Will Charlie be Ali’s Mr Right?
3. All men should bring pasta sauce as a gift for their date
Robert turned up on the red carpet with a jar of his Nono’s sauce in tow, and this is now the standard at which Australian women should hold all of their potential suitors.
No pasta sauce on a first date = no second date.
This sauce is the key to Ali’s heart.
4. Bill is getting THE twinkly music!!! Sound the alarm!
Handsome mehcanical plumber Bill exited the limo to some seriously enchanting Bachelorette tunes. He ended up being so adorably flustered and awkward on the red carpet, but still managed to make an impression on Ali.
Bill was able to redeem himself at the cocktail party, and even scored the ‘the wild rose’ from Ali, which will allow him to steal another man’s single date at some point in the future.
Bill is one to watch!
5. Todd is the knight in shining armour Australia deserves
Not only did Todd dress up as a knight in shining armour to impress Ali, but he also stuck it out in gloriously awkward fashion.
Watching Todd struggle to get in to the limo wearing his armour, and then watching him awkwardly wait in costume, has to be the highlight of the night. Not to mention, the hilarious squeaky sound he made with each step.
Bravo, Todd. Bravo!
Todd is our dream contestant.
6. Has a first kiss EVER happened at a cocktail party before?
Have we ever seen a first kiss take place in the very first episode before? Well, not on The Bachelorette Australia! But Ali was so enamoured with Bill she pulled him in for a cheeky kiss (or two) after asking him to accept the ‘wild rose.’
We’re digging this duo!
Bill scores the first kiss, much to the dismay of onlookers.
7. Literally what is Paddy’s deal?
Who walks in to a cocktail party in the first episode of The Bachelorette and declares they got a kiss on the red carpet, a kiss which definitely didn’t happen? Paddy, that’s who.
“I don’t wanna brag about it and be a cocky little p—k, but she kissed me on the lips,” he said to the other boys upon arrival. “I got the first kiss!”
Fake news aside, Paddy spent the rest of the cocktail party yelling that Ali is “fit as f–k” and when he was called on his arrogant behaviour, he proceeded to give an English slang lesson about why “fit” is a compliment. Funnily enough, calling Ali ‘fit’ wasn’t the problem.
Safe to say Paddy missed the point of his scolding – and quite frankly the point of the show (you know, finding love) – entirely. Seems like he will be one entertaining contestant!
Paddy quickly adopts the role of pot-stirrer on this season of The Bachelorette Australia.
The Bachelorette Australia airs Wednesday and Thursday, 7:30pm, on Network Ten.
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