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Anzac special

Exclusive extract from a new Australian book, VOICE FROM THE TRENCHES by Noel Carthew (New Holland $24.95). As 1914 drew to a close, little did anyone in Australia know that four years of warfare lay ahead. Mothers could not foresee the anguish they would suffer, nor wives and sweethearts their heartbreak. Half a million young Australians had little idea of the grim reality of war as they marched off to do their patriotic duty for King and Country. Among these men were three brothers, Charles, Fred and James Carthew. Voices From The Trenches is their story, told through the letters they wrote to their mother and sisters back home in Victoria. To read them is to live, a little, the life of an Anzac digger, to experience the personal horrors and bloody battles.

Voices From The Trenches, on sale now in all book shops, also represents a remarkable achievement by Noel Carthew, a 79 year old Perth grandmother who inherited the plastic bag of letters, written by her father and two uncles, after a death in the family. Their moving contents gave Noel the passion to turn them into an extraordinary book. In this exclusive extract, Charles, the eldest son, leaves his mother Margaret and the family farm in Myrtleford, Victoria, to go to war:

After hiring a lad to help Old Dave with the heavier farm work and visiting a lawyer to make his will, Charles and his two horses, Silver and Bullet, reported for duty at Broadmeadows, the chief training camp for Victorian military personnel.

Charles had found it almost as painful to take leave of his cattle dog, Black, as it had been to farewell his fiancee, Ethel. Ethel understood that he felt it was his duty to volunteer, but Black did not.

Charles had reared Black from a tiny puppy when his mother died, and from then on the two were inseparable. Margaret often wondered whether there was some mystic link between the dog and her son. It was always necessary to tie Black up whenever Charles left the farm, otherwise he would simply materialise wherever his master happened to be.

Sensing Margaret’s distress, Black had viewed the preparations for his master’s departure with foreboding. He watched anxiously. Attuned as he was to his master’s every mood, Black was well aware of Charles’s sadness, and gazed pleadingly up at his master as he sat down on the front steps and took the dog’s head lovingly between his hands.

Black I have to go away, perhaps for a very long, long time, and I want you to look after Mother for me while I’m gone.’ Charles could not go on ‘Hold him, Nell,’ he said gruffly to his sister Elinor as he turned away and climbed into the buggy. One last wave, and then he was gone.

The public were not allowed on the wharf as Lieutenant Charles Carthew and the 8th Light Horse infantry embarked on the Star of Victoria in the cold, misty, grey dawn of 25 February 1915.

Ethel Semour (his fiancee), Margaret and her four daughters joined the milling throng of relatives and friends who pressed against the iron railings, hoping to catch one last glimpse of their menfolk. It was a sad, silent group little group who boarded the train home to Myrtleford that fateful February day that was to change their lives forever.

13.5.’15

*Dear Mother and all at home,

We are off to the Front on Saturday next, and am sorry to say are going as dismounted L/H (Light Horse). We are not very much cut up about it despite all the work and training we’ve had with them because we are all anxious to be doing something in the real business.

It is nearly three months since we left Aust. And I have only received one letter from home. You ought to be here and see mail after mail come in and no letters from home and then you would know what it is like.

I would ask you not to worry about Fred or I as every man who gets wounded is looked after tip top. And Dear Old Mother, if we should go under feel proud of the fact that you reared two sons who will do their job and who are not afraid to die for their country, like a lot we knew who stopped at home who should be here as its every mans duty who has no home ties.

Well Goodnight

Love from Charlie*

Soon after his arrival at Gallipoli, Anzac Cove was now more or less secure. When the Turks attacked on 3am on 19 May, they were decisively beaten with an estimated 10,000 casualties, while Australian casualties totalled 160 dead and 468 wounded.

The official news correspondent Charles Bean reserved his highest praise for the Australians: They have the devil in them the wild, independent pastoral life makes wild and superb soldiers.

Charles’s trench was only about 27 metres from the Turkish trenches. On 24 May armistice was declared in order for both sides to bury their respective dead. To Charles, the sight of so many dead men, friend or foe, in their prime brave, youthful, magnificent specimens of manhood affected him greatly.

June 29th ’15

*My Dear Mother, Just a line to let you know that I am still going strong – had a rather lively week in the trenches this time. Am sorry to say that Major Gregory and Captain Crowl were both killed the other morning. A shell lobbed in my dugout and burst and destroyed most of my goods – am pleased to say I was not in it at the time. . . Well Mother our cook is yelling for me to come to tea and what do you think eggs are on the board, or ground I should say. We get fresh bread twice a week now I am pleased to say.

Well Dear Mother take care of yourself – more news next time if I can get some paper.

From your loving son, Charlie.*

**Anzac Cove

July 5th ’15**

*Dear Add, Since my card to Mother we have had a rattle with the Turks. The position we, the Eighth hold is about the worst on our front, the trenches being only about 25 to 30 yards apart, my C” ‘Sqrdn holding this part.

On Wednesday night last at 12.15a.m. I had just been relieved from the firing line where my Troop, or what is left of them three killed and thirteen wounded and several sick up to date – was on duty. I had not gone far wen I could hear ‘Allah Allah’ this cry went right along the Turk trenches. Needless to say I did not wait for any more but got back to the firing line as quick as I could get.

The beggars were charging our trenches in their hundreds – some of them got into our saps – they kept coming at us until just on daylight when they had to retire.

On about 50 yards of our front they left between 250 and 300 dead – we mowed them down in heaps.

We are back in the rest camp again now after a fortnight in the trenches and are glad to get back as everybody is done up. I am pleased to say I have had know(sic) occasion for a Dr. as yet. Only to get some disinfectant after getting dead Turks out of our trenches which I can tell you was not a pleasant job, but its wonderful how callous a man becomes at this game. I would have run a mile without looking back from a dead man over there but one doesn’t take any more notice than he would if they were rabbits.

I won’t be sorry when we get out of this and back to our horses if we ever do.

So long for the present.

Love to all at home, Charlie.*

**Anzac Cove

20.17.’15**

*Dear Add,

Things are quite (sic) as far as the Turks are concerned. We stand to arms every second morning when out of the trenches from three till four in the morning which spoils the best part of a mans sleep. I generally go down and have a dip in the sea after stand to arms – its great. I am pleased to say the Eighth Regt. is free from what we call the Scotch Greys [lice]. I don’t know how we escape – all the other units seem to be worried by the pest. One sees men sitting along the beach like monkeys picking the pest off their clothes.

I am sitting in our Mess just after having tea – Bully Beef and biscuits and cocoa – we managed to score a tin and its very nice for a change. Our mess, if you can call it such a think is a biscuit box for a table set in the middle of a bit of level ground cut out of the side of the Hill – we sit on the ground or anything that’s handy. Its rather hot in the daytime but the nights are fine – it don’t require any blankets. We never undress and seldom take off our boots or equipment. Always ready you see. It tells on some of the fellows nerves.

Well Old Girl I’ll have to close now. Hope Mother is not worrying about us and that you are all in the best of health.

Goodbye, Charlie*

Conditions at the front were not good. Most of the young officers were discouraged by blatant mismanagement, orders and counter-orders, and the fact that in three months no worthwhile gain had been made. Ammunition was always in short supply and every unit was undermanned, due not only to casualties but also to the high rate of illness caused mainly by the swarms of flies which bred in the thousands of rotting corpses and the latrines.

Consequently, morale among the Allied troops was at a low ebb, and, weakened by dysentry and malnutrition, nerves frayed by lack of sleep and constant danger, the men bore little resemblance to the fit, confident and eager warriors who disembarked in such high spirits a scant three months before.

**Chas. Carthew

Dardanelles

26.7.’15**

*Dear Girls,

I am at present sitting in a hole in the side of the cliff Well we have been here nine months now and I don’t care how soon we move on. Same old thing every day, shells flying about You will no doubt know about our losses before this reaches you. I was awful cut up.

We were issued with a DAMN Infantry equipment the other day so it looks blue our chance of getting our horses – its enough to break a fellows heart, but I suppose its all in the game and its no use growling We run the risk of being knocked over every day but no one seems to worry in fact its no use worrying. Of course I don’t put that in Mothers or Ethels letters. Am writing this on my notebook – all my stationary got blown up with a shell. You may notice the corner of this paper is all crushed – this book was picked up about fifty yards from my dugout and just as well for me I did not go to sleep that morning or I would not be here now. I had only turned in about a half hour too, but when the Turks started to shoot like blazes I got back in the firing line as quick as I could. As it is I was knocked down twice that morning with concussion of bursting shells but luckily missed any of the fragments.

These shells are awful and they are screaming overhead at present. Well girls, I carnt say much. As for me I was never better in my life.

Well goodbye for the present, Charlie.

Dardanelles*

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Don’t let things fester

Don’t let things fester

Sticks and stones can break your bones, but harsh words can hurt even more. Research shows that arguing with your nearest and dearest makes you more vulnerable to a range of viral infections and lowers your immune system. Most pointedly, women showed more damage than men, presumably because they are also very good at stashing resentments and worries away to brood about later. So, when a major problem looms, take steps to handle it then and there:

  • Know the right time to talk about it: People tend to talk about their problems with money, their sex life, their children and their future when they’re in a bad mood – which can make everything seem far worse than it is. If you plan to talk when you’re feeling calm and well, however, the problem can look quite different.

  • Get emotional If you think you’ve got due cause, allow yourself to get good and angry first of all. Repress your feelings, and you’re just heading for more difficulties.

  • Take time to cool off: Your first reaction might be, “I’m fed up with you – I’m leaving”. But, before you say anything you might regret, you need to work out if the relationship is worth saving.

  • Listen: You need to hear from the other person their perspective about what led to the problem – then you can plan what to do, hopefully together.

  • Don’t forgive too easily: The other person must prove they want things to change, too, otherwise you’re setting yourself up as a doormat.

  • Move on: Work out what went wrong, lay the past to rest, and start again.

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Eat the right protein

Beans may be better than meat when it comes to maintaining strong bones, according to researchers at the University of California in San Francisco. They found that elderly women who consume more animal protein than vegetable protein usually experience more hip fractures and bone loss.

Researchers hypothesise that when the body digests animal protein it releases high levels of acid into the bloodstream. Normally the kidneys neutralise this acid, but as they weaken with age, the body takes acid-neutralising substances from the bones instead. Vegetable protein, on the other hand, produces less acidity and therefore may cause less depletion.

This does not mean you have to stop eating meat and dairy entirely – just that it may be wise to cut back and focus on getting more protein from vegetables, like chickpeas and lima beans.

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Moral hazard

Less than 30 minutes

Exclusive extract from The Australian Women’s Weekly Book of the Month for May.

Chapter 1, Moral Hazard by Kate Jennings (Picador $28):

How would you have me write it? Bloody awful, all of it.

I will tell my story as straight as I can, as straight as anyone’s crooked recollections allow. I will tell it in my own voice, although treating myself as another, observed, appeals. If I can, no jokes or jibes, no persiflage-my preferred defenses. I’d rather eat garden worms than be earnest or serious. Or sentimental.

I recount the events of those years with great reluctance. Not because you might think less of me- there is always that. No, the reason is a rule I try to follow, summed up by Ellen Burstyn in the movie Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore: “Don’t look back. You’ll turn into a pillar of shit.”

See? I can’t help it. Wisecracking-a reflex. I’ve lived in New York for several decades, but I was born in Australia, where the fine art of undercutting ourselves- and others- is learned along with our ABCs. Australians- clowns, debunkers.

I have to start somewhere so it might as well be with Mike.

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May 2002 book reviews

Voices From The Trenches

by Noel Carthew (New Holland $24.95)

This is the first war book I’ve read from beginning to end. It has everything – drama, horror, poetry and emotion. Using family letters written from the trenches during WWI to wives and sweethearts back home, the author breathes life and passion into in a conflict that saw thousands of young Australians die needlessly. Woven between the letters is a compelling narrative which transforms dull slabs of military history into an action movie. Read it and weep.

Amie – Memories of an Australian Childhood

by Amie Livingstone Stirling (Black Inc. $29.95)

Originally published 20 years ago, this book has been re-released with new material added by her proud grand-daughter. A charming, poignant story of a young woman and her unconventional upbringing in south east Australia in the late 1800s to the bohemian streets of Paris and the jungles of Africa in the early 20th century. More fascinating and original than many novels – as Margaret Whitlam says in her foreword, “it’s the sort of book you don’t want to end.”

Baggage

by Emily Barr (Hodder headline $29.95)

This intriguing tale about double identity and running away, is one of my favourites of the year to date. There’s Sophie, the English backpacker who while travelling in the outback, thinks she sees her best friend who supposedly committed suicide ten years earlier. There’s Sophie’s boyfriend, Larry, who thinks he’s onto the hottest story of the century. And Lina, who’s found happiness in the tiny, dusty opal town – or is she really Daisy, the once glamorous ballerina whose glittering career ended in tragedy and scandal?

The Tin Moon

by Stephen J Lacey (Simon & Schuster $19.95)

Beware of reading this on public transport, as it will make you laugh out loud. A charming, endearing and darkly comic account of a young boy growing up in a daggy, working class suburb on the central coast of NSW. If you can remember Choo-Choo Bars it will ring a lot of bells. Even if you can’t, you will love this chronicle of life in Australia as it once was. You may even yearn for it.

Lucky Man

by Michael J. Fox ( Bantam $39.95)

He announced he had been diagnosed with Parkinsons’s disease in 1998. In fact, Michael J. Fox had been secretly fighting it for seven years. Not another self absorbed, Hollywood star bleating on about his tragedy, but a thoughtful, interesting story which includes his childhood, marriage, acting, alcoholism and his journey from initial denial, fear and anger to certainty that the illness is a positive in his life.

Love, Greg & Lauren

by Greg Manning (Macmillan $30)

A riveting read about Lauren Manning, wife and mother of an 11 month old son, who received burns to 82.5percent of her body when she stepped into the lobby at the One World Trade Centre on September 11, just as a fireball exploded. Her husband, Greg, watches over her as she lies in hospital, sending emails to family friends and colleagues that became his daily journal. Through his eyes, we experience the journey to recovery, going from despair to triumph. Crow Lake by Mary Lawson (Random House $29.95)

A gripping and emotional first novel about a young woman who thinks she has escaped the grim, rural backwater where she grew up and the strange and terrible things that happened there. Inexorably, she is drawn back to face to face her past and the family history and misunderstandings that cast long shadows on her successful, city life and romance.

Fiddleback

by J.M. Morris (Macmillan $28)

A psychological thriller that is completely unput-downable. I took it away at Easter and became the holiday-mate from hell who wouldn’t be torn from her book. Fiddleback refers to a type of deadly spider and it is very easy to get trapped in this sticky, web-like plot that has you following the exploits of Ruth Gemmill who sets off to find her brother who has gone missing in a dark and lonely town called Greenwell.

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Kate Jennings q&a

Interview with Kate Jennings, author of Moral Hazard, Book Of The Month in the May issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly.

Moral Hazard (Picador $28): Clever, literary Cath, is plunged into the cut-throat world of Wall Street after her husband, Bailey, is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease and she needs the money to pay for his care. A dark sounding plot transformed into a riveting read that makes you cry and laugh, while Cath runs as fast as she can between her unravelling private life and the snake pit of big business. Perceptive, witty and full of raw emotion, this is one of the most powerful books of the year.

Q Congratulations on the book, I read it in one sitting and kept reading it out loud to my husband so he could share the laughs. A I’m glad you got the funny bits – you’ve obviously worked in offices.

Q The story is both hilarious and heart-breaking, I imagine it’s semi-autobiographical because of the way you depict what it’s like to work on Wall St? A I write close to life. The book came about because my husband was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease and I went to work on Wall Street to pay the bills. It seemed to me that I was commuting between two forms of dementia – that’s what I wanted to depict. All the same, the book is fiction, with made-up characters. Life is much messier and more awful. Let’s just say that the facts are not necessarily true, but the emotions are.

Q How did you survive between what was happening in your personal life and the pressure of having to work in an alien environment and learn all that financial jargon – you must have been exhausted? A I was. Like Cath, the central character in the book, I didn’t have the luxury of being able to be judgemental or have opinions or any of the ordinary things that people do. I did it because I had to do it. It was truly a nightmare. But there are people who have much larger nightmares. They have spouses who are sick for many years and they raise children. Sometimes those spouses go through dreadful personality changes which happens with neurological diseases. I only had 7 years. But the fact is, Wall Street is fascinating. So it did take my mind off the other part of my life. I had to concentrate. Every minute of the day I had to be alert and use every bit of my brain because it was so foreign. The finance side I managed to learn relatively easily. The corporate side was really really hard. In fact I had to go to a shrink, a behavioural guy who was an expert on organisations. And he would interpret for me because I had no idea what was going on. A lot of tips in the book that the character Mike gives Cath, I got from the shrink. There was no such person as Mike. I wish I’d had someone like that. I did meet some extremely kind and supportive people, but it’s a brutal environment.

Q I’m amazed you got your head wrapped around the financial side – most creative people blank out when a number’s mentioned. A I was the same way. I couldn’t tell a stock from a bond. It’s a pity that we do that because what bankers do, affects us all. I had to pinch myself that I was actually working with these guys. Who knew that men in suits with thinning hair could be so mesmerising, so chock full of juicy hypocrisy and fabulous vainglory – ripe for the picking! As a novelist, I was drooling.

Q The way you describe these powerful men and they’re plots in your book, it’s almost Shakespearian? A That’s exactly what it is. Such drama, such tumult.

Q What you’ve been doing since leaving Wall St? A The first year after Bob died I was a mess. You would think that I would be in some sense relieved not to have the burden of the nursing home and to have your heart breaking in 100 different ways every day. But that wasn’t the case. Bob was a wonderful man. He was so vital, so alive. I was the last person you’d ever expect to find on Wall Street – and he was the last person you would ever think would lose his mind. After he died, I was completely adrift. I was left with me and my demons. I stopped working on Wall Street, because it was really hard to stay once it was no longer necessary. So I wrote the book, sobbing. People say you should let experiences lie for a while before you write about them. Then again, this way it’s more immediate, more raw. The ending was actually much more pessimistic, but by the time I did the final draft I was able to inject more of my husband’s optimism. Since then I’ve been selling the book. Promoting it. So I’ve been preoccupied with all that. But the thing that has happened that has made a huge difference is that my former boss on Wall Street gave me a little dog. He is a border terrier named Stanley, and he has saved my life because not only do I have to go outside the apartment to walk him every day, but I talk with all kinds of different dog people. There’s a big dog culture in New York. He’s always curious and wakes up every day ready for the world. And it’s hard to be miserable around a creature like that.

Q It’s also interesting that your former boss was sensitive to what happened to you. A Yes, sure, not all bankers are corrupt and ruthless!

Q A lot of people who died during the September 11 attack were involved in the financial world, did anyone you know perish? A I walked under the World Trade Centre every day for a number of years. The people I used to work with were all evacuated. It was beyond terrible, beyond any nightmare. But New York is very segmented and I didn’t know anybody else who died. They were saying everyone knows someone who perished, but it’s actually not true.

Q Was it a sense of adventurousness and curiosity about the world that made you leave Australia and travel to New York in 1979? A Yes. I didn’t want to go to England. It’s been 22 years – I’ve lived here longer than anywhere else. There were all kinds of reasons for leaving. Sixties radicalism was dying down — it was time to move on. I wasn’t the most thoughtful person in the world. I just up and left. Pride made me stay.

Q Was it difficult to make a living and survive in NY? A Early on it was difficult. I worked as a freelance writer for many years and every time the economy dipped, I, like all freelancers, felt it. So there were dire times.

Q You were raised in the Riverina on a farm – what kind of farm was it ? A Wheat, sheep, irrigation. Both my parent’s families from way, way back were farmers. There are two of us. My brother is Dare Jennings from Mambo. We were strange, determined, ambitious kids.

Q You both finished up with lives far removed from your upbringing? A Yes, we did (laughing). Dare lives in Sydney, practically in the sea and I live surrounded by skyscrapers. We went back last year for my Dad’s 80th birthday. Two hundred farmers and their wives had all gathered at the local bowling club. Both Dare and I had to speak. That was the hardest audience either of us will ever have! Country people – they’re independent sods, aren’t they? I realised how much of that is part of me – I don’t much like being told what to think.

Q Alzheimer’s disease is depicted in the book as being horrific and yet it also takes the brain on some fantastic adventures. Bailey said some amazing things and at times, he had acute insight ? A With Alzheimer’s, the brain is like a transmitter, fading in and out. If the brain ceased to work altogether, it would be easier. But it doesn’t happen like that. It affects people in different ways, But, yes, sometimes he’d say something and I would think, ‘Where did that come from?’

Q What did you set out to achieve with Moral Hazard? A Apart from depicting my commute between two forms of dementia, I really wanted to write a book about New York City. My last novel was set in Australia — I wanted to do the same thing with New York. And instead of writing about falling in love and dating and going to clubs — the usual stuff of novels set in this city — I wanted to portray an adult world, where the central character is navigating personal and public obligations.

Q Your book also explores euthanasia? A We all have had a relative or someone close to us say ‘Don’t let me get like that.’ Fact is, there’s a good chance that it will happen. You don’t know that you won’t end up demented, in diapers and drooling. I wanted to describe the emotional state that made Cath take her husband’s life. I’m not passing judgement on her – I wanted to understand. Dignity in death beliefs are intensely personal. Every case is different. I feel really strongly about letting people die when it’s their time. If there’s an issue I’m going to get worked up about, it’s that. To give aggressive medical care to people with late stage Alzheimer’s is horrible and cruel. That part of the book was true. Bob was so frightened, so distressed. In the end, he died of natural causes, but it was a big issue. There’s a line from a Leonard Cohen song that goes, ‘May everyone live and may everyone die.’ That sounds completely redundant. Of course we live and of course we die, but will we be allowed to die when we need to?

Q Can I ask how old you are? A Um, let’s see, 1948…I don’t know about you but I stopped counting after 50.

Q Is your age irrelevant to you? A I try not to pay attention to it. It’s hard because once women hit 50, they become invisible. Unless they’re Charlotte Rampling. So, hey, we may as well toddle along and think our own thoughts and not give a damn.

Q That’s a bleak view? A It’s true.

Q Well maybe, in general terms, like when you’re walking down the street, but not in other ways. A In investment banking, the average age was 27. I wasn’t just old, I was Neanderthal. Kids wouldn’t ask me what happened in the 1960’s — they would ask me what happened in the 1980’s. And New York being what it is, there’s even more of an emphasis on youth. Generally, I am happy to be alive and to be writing.

Q Where did you do your tertiary study? A At Sydney University.

Q What kind of degree did you get? A In English Literature – really shot myself in the foot there, didn’t I? (laughing).

Q You didn’t start off writing books, did you? A I started as a poet. I write ‘short,’ which means I re-write, re-write, re-write. My agent would love me to write longer novels — more money in it! I can’t do that – I keep reducing it down.

Q Do you write during set hours? A I’m fairly disciplined, being used to deadlines. I have to be, otherwise I might find myself back in a corporation. I mainly write in the morning. By the time I’ve walked the dog and read the newspapers it’s nine’ish. I’ll work till 2 or 3 in the afternoon. This book was different. This one I had to tie myself to the chair.

Q But writing it was also act of compulsion, wasn’t it? A Yes.

Q Did writing the book help you through the grief, because you do have to stop crying to write – right? A Yes. And also I had to earn a living. I had to get the book out there. At some point I had to stop being self-indulgent and say this is what I’ve got to do – or else!

Q Do you see yourself spending the rest of your life in NY? A I would say so. I have really good friends and a good apartment. Shortly after my father’s 80th, my brother had his 50th, so I went back twice to Australia within a relatively short period of time, and I have to say, Sydney is gorgeous. And the living is easy, great restaurants, cafes, weather. I would like to visit more.

Q Have the film rights been sold to Moral Hazard? A There’s some talk. Novels are crap-shoots. You can’t count on movie rights or get excited. You can’t even hope for them.

Q Do your hopes include becoming a big, best selling writer? A I would like to be able to earn my living from writing fiction. I don’t need a lot to live on. I’m happiest when I’m working. I really like to do this thing and do it well. I can’t imagine that someone (laughing) who writes short, grim, subversive books like mine will ever become rich and famous, but you never know!

Q Well, Moral Hazard has just been made Book Of The Month by The Australian Women’s Weekly? A Yes! That’s true!

Q Your biography describes you as a leading figure in the Australian feminist movement, what did you do? A I was a part of the first little feminist group in Sydney. We were also Vietnam War activists. At one moratorium, we managed to persuade the guys to let us give a speech. And I gave that speech — it was extremely confrontational. “You’ll think I’m a bra burning, man-hating, castrating lesbian bitch…well I am,” and they went berserk. Rhetorical language, of course.

Q Your parent’s must have been mystified by you? A Oh yes. I think all parents of sixties radicals were shocked and dismayed. You could say I spent the first half of my life getting on a high horse, the next half getting of it. They were wild years. We went at everything full tilt. I lived by Jane Austen’s motto: “Run mad as often as you choose, but do not faint.” The other thing I did at that time was put out the first anthology of women’s poetry. It was called Mother I’m Rooted and it made the front pages of the newspapers with photographs of me saying “Men are stupid.”

Q You were a wildfire weren’t you? A Yes. And there’s still fight in me.

Q How long were you married for? A Seventeen years – ten good ones, seven bad. My husband was so optimistic. He enjoyed life. I wasn’t the kind of person who knew how to have fun. He showed me how to have fun.

Q How did you meet? A I was working on a magazine and he came to work there as an art designer. He also designed record covers and some are famous. You’d recognise them. He knew everyone. And through him, I got to be a part of the community.

Q How much older was he than you? A 25 years.

Q And not a second of that counted? A No, it didn’t. And talk about learning not to worry about age — he never did. He’d see other older people and say “Am I like that?” Then it really caught up with him big time.

Q Have you got back into dating again? A No.

Q Because you’re still feeling bruised or because you’re content with your life as it is? A I had the great good luck to have a really good marriage. I’m okay. I’m fine. There are worse things than being alone. And most men are dead boring. (Laughing) They talk at you, have endless opinions, tell you what’s what!

Q Working on anything else? A I’m starting on a new novel. And concentrating on promoting this book, which is a big job. It’s amazing how labour intensive it is. My first book Snake really did well here and in England. We’ll see what happens now…

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Stress release

Just slow down

Lewis Carroll put the feeling of spinning chaos that comes from go-go-going too fast in a nutshell when he wrote of “life becoming a spasm and history a whiz”. Sometimes you spend days just rushing from one meeting or task to the next, but no matter how hard you push yourself, you still end up feeling as if you haven’t accomplished anything. As an experiment, see if you can make a conscious effort to slow down – both your thinking and your actions. If you do this, you’ll be pleasantly surprised to discover that, despite your slower speed, you will become far more effective, as well as more relaxed. Try these tips when things get out of control:

  • Desert a crisis A quick and easy way to clear your head during stressful periods is to physically remove yourself. Take yourself away from the problem environment – your house, or your office, for instance – and walk around for at least five minutes.

  • Drop everything Occasionally allow yourself to do absolutely nothing. Zero. Zilch. Discard your to-do list, put away your plans, and forget about the news. Instead, look out the window and watch the world go by, or stretch out on your bed and daydream.

  • Relish your privacy Consider these exquisitely wise words from Chinese philosopher La-tzu: “Just remain in the centre, watching. And then forget that you are there.” Take time to just be. Cutting yourself off from the world not only relaxes you, it can help you to achieve inner peace and enable you to clear your head for solving any unresolved work or emotional problems. The next time you are given a few delicious free moments – you get off work a little earlier than usual, you’re alone in the house for an hour before the kids come home, you’ve got 30 minutes before a meeting – try not to immediately fill it with crossing things off your to-do list. Simply stop.

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Tassels and tiebacks

Add the finishing touch to curtains and cushions with our easy-to-make tassels. They have been designed so everyone can make them, even at the first attempt.

Gold Tassels

(Makes 2)

Materials

2 plastic curtain rod ends

Gold spray paint

30cm narrow gold cord

Sharp scissors or craft knife

60cm x 16cm fringing

Clear tape

Tacky craft glue

Step 1

Using scissors or a craft knife, cut the pointed end from the curtain rod ends to form a hole. Spray the curtain ends with two or three coats of gold paint, allowing it to dry between applications.

Step 2

Cut gold cord to form the tassel loop. Wind tape around each end to prevent fraying, then push both ends through the curtain rod end. Tape cord ends together and pull up inside curtain rod end.

Step 3

Roll up the fringing, keeping the top end aligned, to form a tassel. Tape the end of the fringing to secure. Push the tassel inside the rod end and glue in place.

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Tartan rug

The ideal picnic rug or a warm cover to wrap yourself into this winter. Our popular tartan rug is a classic that’s perfect for all seasons.

Materials. Patons Tasman 8ply (100g) or any 8ply yarn; 4 balls red, 4 balls bottle green; 1 ball yellow; 1 ball white. One 3.50mm (No 9) crochet hook and one 5mm (No 6) crochet hook. Wool needle.

Finished size. Approximately 124cm square.

Tension. 10 sts (1tr, 1ch) and 10 rows to 10cm, using 3.50mm hook.

Abbreviations.Ch: chain; cont: continue; dc: double crochet; rep: repeat; sp/s: space/s; st/s: stitch/es; tr: treble.

Note. 3ch at beg of row stands for 1tr.

Rug

Using red and 3.50mm hook, make 252ch.

Row 1. Miss 5ch, 1tr in next ch, 1ch, miss 1ch, 1tr in next ch; rep from to end … 124 sps.

Row 2. 4ch, 1tr in next tr, 1ch; rep from to end, 1tr in 2nd turning ch.

Rep row 2, working 6 rows more in red, 1 row yellow, 2 rows green, 2 rows red, 2 rows green, 1 row yellow, 8 rows red, 1 row white, 9 rows green, 1 row yellow, 1 row green, 2 rows yellow, 1 row green, 1 row yellow, 9 rows green, 1 row white, 8 rows red; rep from once more, then work 1 row yellow, 2 rows green, 2 rows red, 2 rows green, 1 row yellow, 8 rows red … 124 rows.

Fasten off.

Weaving Chains

Using red and 3.50mm hook, make a 153cm-long length of chain, leaving 5cm of yarn at each end for darning in (the chain should be long enough to weave through sps without being too tight).

Fasten off.

Using red, make 53 chains more … 54 chains.

Using green, make 52 chains.

Using yellow, make 14 chains,

Using white, make 4 chains.

Mark the centre row of tr on Rug and weave a red chain vertically on each side of this row.

Cont to one side weaving a green chain in each of next 2 rows, then 1 yellow, 8 red, 1 white, 9 green, 1 yellow, 1 green, 2 yellow, 1 green, 1 yellow, 2 green, 2 red, 2 green, 1 yellow and 8 red.

Rep on other side of rug, weaving chains to correspond.

Darn in all ends and trim neatly.

Edging

Row 1. Using red and 5mm hook, work a row of dc evenly around rug, working 3dc in each corner.

Row 2. 1dc in each dc around, working 2dc in each 3dc corner.

Fasten off.

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Sarah Turnbull q&a

Almost French by Sarah Turnbull (Random House $22.92) is the Book Of The Month in The Australian Women’s Weekly, April issue. It is a vivid, funny, sometimes teary account of the adventures of an Australian who falls in love with a Frenchman and goes to live in Paris.

Q What made you write this book? A I had the idea for quite a while, before I did anything about it. In the first place it was friends and family – every time I came back to Australia, I’d tell them stories about things that had happened in Paris and they’d say you should write a book about that! But when it comes from people like that, who are close to you, you go ‘oh yeah!’ But you don’t take them seriously.

I guess I started seriously thinking about it after I went to W.H. Smith, the English bookshop in Paris and bought a lot of books on France. I suppose I was not so keen on writing the book in the first place because I thought there were already a lot of books about France – is there anything more to say? Only when I started reading these other books did I come around to the idea that ‘yes,’ there is room for writing something a bit fresh, a bit different without it being ‘quaint,’ because I don’t think life in Paris or France is necessarily ‘quaint.’ It’s fascinating and it’s many wonderful things.

I think that changed how I perceived the book. I became more confident about the idea after I’d bought half the stock at W.H. Smith! I started believing in it then.

Q Were there many books by foreigners living in France? A In the genre, Under The Tuscan Sun comes to mind, and then of course there was the book on Provence by Peter Mayle…I don’t think there have been that many by someone actually living in France or Paris. I think a lot of them have retired and bought a house that they do up. There’s quite a bit of that genre.

I guess I always felt one of my strengths was Fred. Having a French partner which gave me an insight into the whole French side of things, with his family and French friends which was quite confronting initially but also fantastic.

Q You call him Fred in real life, not Frederic as you call him in the book? A Yes. I do say in the book that when I first arrived in France I had trouble with pronouncing his name because of the two ‘R’s.’ What I didn’t say is that I still have trouble and so ‘Fred’ stuck. Unless I really concentrate, I still can’t say it properly.

Q When you first went to Europe it was for a year, so I imagine you were surprised to find a holiday turned into something permanent? A Yes, you never look that far ahead. I think often in life you make quite big decisions without realising they are big decisions. I was in backpacker mode and not ready to go back to Australia. I’d had a lovely holiday with Fred and I was not ready to end the relationship by any means. And so staying sounded like the sensible thing to do. I didn’t know what was in store. I didn’t think of how difficult it was going to be. It was a different city when I came back to settle here from the one I’d visited in August. It was winter and bleak and I realised it was quite a different thing to come back and settle here rather than visit. All of a sudden I was confronted with the reality of making my life in France. Then I began to think, ‘hang on, this might not be so easy.’

People think of Paris as small and being quite contained and not intimidating, other than the fact that people speak French. I’d been there quite a few times and I knew Fred and I knew what French people were like so it would be quite easy. Of course I was completely naive, it was much more difficult than I expected.

Apart from the usual thing of moving to a new country, there was also the challenge of finding work and getting set up as a freelance journalist. But I think that there are things about France that do perhaps make it more challenging. The fact that you feel it’s all familiar makes it all the harder when you do confront things that you just simply don’t understand. You find yourself at a dinner party say, everybody’s speaking rapid fire French, you can’t understand a word and you feel completely alien. Terribly alone.

When I first arrived I didn’t want to hang out with other Aussies or foreigners. I wanted to have a bunch of French girlfriends, I thought that would come quite easily. When that didn’t happen I met up with some other foreigners living in Paris and that was very helpful because we were all having the same experiences and same problems. Talking to them (laughing) made me feel I wasn’t the only loser going through these difficulties.

Q How did you get the book published? A Because it was my first book, I really had no idea how it worked. So I wrote an introduction of 1500 words and sent that with a proposal to about six publishers. And to the literary agents, Curtis Brown. I think nearly all of them got back to me, saying pretty positively that they were interested in the book. On my next visit to Sydney I met with Random House and that was very helpful because the woman there gave me some very good advice. She said ‘I think it could work. But you’re going to have to put more of yourself into it.’ Being a journalist who had very rarely ever written the word ‘I’ before, I was very loathe to make it personal. In fact in the first version Fred didn’t even have a name – he was ‘the lawyer.’

But if there was one thing I found difficult about writing a book it was that – that whole aspect of writing about my life. There were various stages where I completely freaked out and resisted it. Funnily enough Fred was fine about it, but I didn’t necessarily want our arguments aired dialogue- style in a book.

Q Was Fred the first person to read the finished manuscripts? A Fred read many drafts along the way. And came up with a lot of good ideas. My friend the fashion journalist who I talk about in the book, was also great. And friends and family back in Australia also read drafts and made suggestions.

Q I loved, Maddie, the ‘wonder’ dog in the book and the way everyone in Paris fauns over her. A Maddie the stubborn dog, you mean. But it was funny and unexpected, the way she opened a whole new, weird world in Paris for me.

Q Are you still working as a freelance journalist? A I haven’t been, I decided to take off time for the book – I think it’s been about a year and a half all up. Now I’m starting to get back to it again. I’d reached the point where I was happy to stop doing articles. It can be tricky freelancing and I was happy to take a break.

Q How did you organise your day when you were writing the book? A I had set hours. If I felt it wasn’t going anywhere I’d take Maddie out for a walk. I go down to the cafe first and have my coffee at nine o’clock. I would sit there watching the street entertainment, all the food deliveries rolling up and then I’d go back to my office and work till about six or seven. And then go to the gym – two or three nights a week. I gave myself monthly deadlines.

Q The title is yours or the publishers?A To be honest we were having trouble coming up with a title. They didn’t like mine and I didn’t like theirs. Time was running out. Then one day I was reading some film reviews and there was one called ‘Almost Famous’ – so I adapted that. It said everything I wanted to say. That whole struggle of integrating into a new country and realising you will only ever be ‘almost’ and perhaps that’s okay.

Although I had this interesting experience recently…we’d only just come back to Paris from Australia where we’d enjoyed a few weeks, to this grey, bleak, wintry weather and I had an attack of post holiday blues. Then I went down to the market and straight away the cheese man called out ‘how did that cheese go down that I vacuum packed for you? Did everyone like it in Australia?’ And people started calling out, ‘how was your holiday?’ And I suddenly thought, ‘yes, this is my home.’ It was lovely, gave me a sense of belonging.

Q You are obviously fluent in French now and that’s made a big difference? A Yes, that was crucial. Remember too there was the incentive in that in the beginning, I was with a Frenchman whose English wasn’t that great but it was better than my French. But Fred’s English wasn’t wonderful so speaking in English wasn’t an option. I had to learn to speak French quite quickly. Also, back then we only had French friends and I’d end up at the end of a night out without having said a word. Not because they wanted to be rude, they just didn’t think at all of slowing down so that I could understand or stopping to explain things. So I’d finish up sitting around a table for four hours, not having a clue what was being said. You get tired of just sitting there nodding, so I did have to learn pretty quickly.

Q You were born and raised in Australia? A No, I was born in Texas, in the US because my father was in the military, an airforce pilot. My older brother and younger sister were born in Singapore. In fact I grew up mainly in Canberra in between overseas postings. I did a lot of my schooling in Canberra and went to university at the ANU where I did an Arts degree. Ironically, I remember being advised to drop French…

Q The thing you love most about returning to Australia? A The people. Friends and family. I have this need to go back to Australia every year. I have to do it. I’m lucky, my parents live near the beach and it’s just beautiful there. There are many wonderful things to do in Paris, but you can’t duplicate friends and family.

Q The thing you love about Paris? A I love the quarter, the neighbourhood where I live. Living in a market street. There’s so much life, it’s so entertaining. It’s a part of Paris that still has the village atmosphere and that has given me tremendous happiness.

Q Do you have an idea for another book? A I’d like to think I could write another book, but it won’t be of this genre. But I only have vague ideas at this stage.

Q Maddie must have loved you being at home longer than normal, writing the book? A Depends. When I’d go out to do interviews, especially if it was a fashion one, I’d take Maddie with me and they’d just love it. One day I had to go into a fashion house to pick up something and the girl asked eagerly, ‘are you going to bring your dog?’ She loves the attention of course, plays up to it incredibly. She probably thinks writing books is incredibly dull because she misses her outings.

Q Are children a part of your plans? A Yes we’d like to have them at some stage… we’ll see what happens.

Q Unfulfilled ambitions? A I don’t think like that. I’m not one for setting goals – I just think whatever you do, do it as best you can.

Q Has Paris changed you in any way? A My fashion journalist friends were only teasing me recently because I was wearing some new boots and she was laughing, saying compare those with those Doc Martens you wore when you arrived in Paris. These have a pointy toe and a bit of a heel – I’m still not into heels, but they’re nothing like the clumpy shoes I got around in when I first arrived. So I’m sure there have been some changes there. French clothes tend to be very tailored and quite feminine and I think it’s quite natural to wear things that are a bit more snug or tight fitting.

Q Are you slender? A Yeah, I’m a little person. So I’m lucky I can fit into them, some of my friends from Australia find it hard to find French clothes to fit.

Paris has changed me in some ways profoundly as well and yet when I’ve asked people back home they say you’re still the same. I think anyone who’s ever lived abroad, the things you see and experience do change you – make you stronger and hopefully, more open minded.

When you first arrive in France you react against it. You make rash judgements. And you think the French are this or that, because you don’t understand. Because you feel hurt. Then, as you get to know the language and the French character things change. And I think with time, you realise there is no malice intended, it’s simply a different culture and it’s up to you to learn about and come to understand it.

Q Do you have any advice for anyone going to Paris? ADon’t take offence at the attitudes, would that be a good tip for starters? A Yes, although I do think there has been a marked change in Paris with regards to foreigners. My parents have noticed it. While a couple of words of French would be nice, Parisians are much more willing to speak English now. There has been a slow opening up in the seven years I’ve been here. I think if people are coming to live here the advice I’d give is don’t give up. I’ve spoken now to so many foreigners who have moved here and I’ve discovered that it’s normal to find it difficult and confronting. They all agree it’s a lot more difficult than you expect – and then you come out of it.

Q And then you fall in love? A Absolutely. The other thing is living in France or any foreign country, there are still things that can surprise you, that you don’t understand because you don’t still don’t know all the culture or even share the same history, or background. There is an underlying tension which makes it more exciting. It is also a wonderful thing. It makes it an adventure.

Q Long term where do you see yourself? A At one stage we’ll come back and live in Australia, at least for a while. If nothing else, so that I can be close to my family and friends and Fred is very open to that idea. One problem is that Fred is the main bread-winner and I don’t think there’s much work for French lawyers in Australia.

Q He can take some time off, then? A Yes, he loves that idea in fact. He’d love to do more painting – he paints in water colours – and he likes to draw.

Q That’s not you on the cover of the book? A No.

Q You had a lot of tough times settling into Paris, ever get close to jumping on a plane and coming back and if not, what stopped you? A It crossed my mind a couple of times. But it never ever was really an option.

Q What stopped you? A I think part of that answer obviously was Fred. And I have to say that even though when I was feeling at my bleakest, I still did believe it would work out. That I could be really happy in France. I just had to get through this. And I did that with the help of a few close girlfriends – we’d go out and drink too much house wine.

Q I felt by the end of the book you’d come to understand something about your own Australian-ness? A Yes. Having lived abroad quite a bit, I’d never really thought of myself as very Australian, but living here has made me realise I am definitely more Australian than I thought. Things like being more direct and an attachment to things being more relaxed.

Q How many countries did you live in growing up? A Singapore, Surry in England and Montgomery, Alabama in Texas, which was quite strange.

Q Did your nomadic upbringing make it easier for you to move to France? A I always thought it had made me more flexible, but it didn’t. So part of my initial reaction to Paris was ‘well hang on, I’m supposed to be good at this. Why isn’t this working?’

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