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Warwick Capper for mayor!

The perennial self-promoter has his sights set on the gold coast’s highest office.

After a string of low-profile jobs — a “stop-go” man on a road repair crew and a meter-maid — Warwick Capper is trading in his tight shorts for a suit and running for mayor.

The former AFL star is so serious he’s already hit the campaign trail, kissing babies and raising election funds.

“I’ll be the greatest mayor the Gold Coast ever had,” he humbly declares. “And with my fame and charisma I’ll pull more tourists to the Gold Coast than ever before.”

Despite his reputation taking a dive since he was thrown out of Big Brother for exposing his genitals in 2002, the 44-year-old has no doubt he has what it takes.

“I know some people have a certain opinion about me because of some crazy things I’ve done, but that’s all ancient history.

“I’ll be so sensational they’ll probably want to put up a 50-foot high statue of me right in the heart of Surfers Paradise.”

Warwick plans to raise funds for his campaign by hosting a huge auction of personal memorabilia, which he hopes will net him $100,000 ahead of the election next year.

And he’s even flogging his own locks! He’s just had 8cm of his famous mullet cut off, and he intends to auction off the cuttings for $5000.

“I read somewhere that a lock of Napoleon’s hair was sold at auction for thousands of dollars,” he explains. “I reckon if it’s good enough for Napoleon then it’s good enough for Warwick — we’re both about equally famous.”

For the full story, see this week’s Woman’s Day (on-sale July 16)

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On ya bike

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I put toenails in my colleagues’ lunch

I was so excited when I started my first professional job at a human resources company. All my previous jobs were temporary positions in hospitality that entailed long hours, low pay and a lot of fussy customers. So I was ecstatic, to say the least, to be finally working in a professional environment with professional colleagues. My role was administration support and office manager.

My first week was great. Everyone was so friendly and easy going. Within a few months I had mastered all my tasks and responsibilities and I was effectively running the office.

My role required me to offer administrative support right down to menial tasks such as maintaining the stock of staff consumables like coffee and toilet paper. At first I was happy to do this as it was part of my job but as the months went by I started to notice how fussy and petty the staff became.

At first they started to comment on the way I would do certain tasks, so I would change to suit them. Next the brand of coffee I was buying wasn’t good enough. Then they turned into office divas complaining about the ply level of the toilet paper I was ordering and right down to the office stationery paper being ‘too white’ for them. I couldn’t believe the complaints I was hearing. These people were outweighing the fussiness of my past customers in hospitality. Everything I did or bought, there was something wrong with it.

One particular day I had to organise an annual office luncheon for the Melbourne Cup. I had heard about the disaster of last year’s event from the previous office assistant. She was so traumatised on the day that she actually had to be sent home because she couldn’t stop crying. At first I thought the story may have been slightly exaggerated and I laughed it off. But on the day of my planned Melbourne Cup event I came to realise it was not far from the truth at all.

I had organised a huge feast for the staff, and a sweep. It looked great and I didn’t think anyone could find any fault with my fantastic spread. Well, to start with my brand of orange juice was too sweet, then my muffins were too small and didn’t have enough choc-chips, I hadn’t organised enough sweeps for the day and to top it off certain staff members decided to have a little tantrum because the sandwich rolls I had organised didn’t contain enough chicken options and they refused to eat any other variety. Considering I had organised every other sandwich filling under the sun I thought that they were being totally ridiculous and petty to be making such a big deal about it. But apparently their tantrum was warranted!

According to them, I had not provided enough food options. So the three staff members who had their little fit about the food requested that I go and buy them chicken salads as they couldn’t eat any of the other food options I had organised.

At first I found it funny that they actually expected me to leave the office to buy them something else after all that I had planned. After all, this was a luncheon that management had paid for as a reward for staff and at the end of the day I still had so much work to catch up on after I organised the event. But much to my surprise my manager asked me to buy the additional salads for the staff. I couldn’t believe it. I was fuming. The assistant who organised the luncheon last year could see my frustration and gave me a sympathetic look.

So, off I went to buy their salads. The whole time I was in my car driving to the salad bar I was fuming. You could practically see the steam coming out of my ears. I was so frustrated and angry that people could be so petty and immature. And I started questioning what job I hadn’t gotten myself into. I had never, ever worked with such ridiculous people and I was not used to such petty behaviour from staff. Customers yes, but not staff.

Well, I bought their silly salads and was still reeling with anger when I saw my manicure kit on the passenger side floor. I had gone to my friend’s house the night before and had a girly night and the kit was still in the car. I opened the manicure set and a wicked thought came to mind. I started clipping my toenails and nails and then cut them into tiny little pieces. I had no polish on so my nail clippings were natural looking. I then sprinkled the clippings in each of the salads. I mixed them around and you could not tell the difference. I couldn’t believe what I had just done but I felt so satisfied, as much as I hate to admit it.

I brought the salad back and their sad little faces lit up as soon as they saw their food. One of them made a remark that now they could ‘finally eat some decent food’. Whatever remorse I’d had flew out the window once I heard that snide remark. They started eating their chicken Caesar salads eagerly, and slowly but surely a little smile started creeping on my face. The other assistant notice me smirking and asked me what I was smiling at. I quickly stopped and just replied that I was happy with the turnout and that everyone looked to be enjoying themselves.

My manager agreed and commended me on a job well done. Everyone chimed in and thanked me for my efforts, then went back to work. I was left to clean up but couldn’t have been happier. As I went to collect the empty salad containers not a morsel of food remained. The salad must have been tasty.

I am a pretty quiet person and normally very mindful of work rules and ethics. But I believe I was pushed over the edge. I had never dealt with such demanding and particular people and didn’t know how to handle it. I would never do something like that again. Since then, I have been able to express my frustration with some of their demands. But on that day I was still new and finding my place in the office culture. I didn’t want to disrupt things and make my time harder than it had to be. All in all, everyone had a great day at that Melbourne cup celebration … and I won the sweep! So everyone was happy in the end.

Picture posed by model

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Madonna: Look at me!

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Snack attack

By Judy Davie

**”It’s the same story every time I try to lose weight. Even weekends are easy compared to weekdays in the office. Almost every day at around 4.00pm my energy plummets and I make for the vending machine. Can you suggest anything I can do to overcome this?”

— Fiona**

There’s a clue in this. During weekends your attention is filled and you are less preoccupied with the thought of eating whereas at work you’re thinking far more about what you eat. Maybe it’s because you’re busy and activity is boosting your energy on the weekend, or you simply have more going on to keep you engaged.

It’s very common for people with sedentary occupations to experience energy slumps mid-morning and in particular around 4.00pm (I call it the 4.00pm slump). Some of these feelings I suspect are generated from boredom as well as physical inactivity.

When you consider the lifestyle of our ancestors it’s clear we were not designed to sit all day at a desk focusing on a computer screen, and while I’m not about to suggest you give up your job, a very effective way to manage energy troughs is to ensure you get up and move in the day. Take the stairs instead of the lift if you can and go for a walk during your lunch hour. Just do something to increase the blood circulation and distribute nutrients throughout the body. Nutrients from food provide energy to the muscles and brain, you just have to move to get them circulating.

On the subject of nutrients

It’s fairly safe to say that you’ll find nothing of any nutritional value from a vending machine other than high salt, high fat and high sugar items, all of which will carry a high energy value so let’s make a pact with yourself now that, as of today, the vending machine is out of bounds.

What you eat in the lead up to 4.00pm is another key to avoiding the vending machine

A substantial well balanced breakfast and lunch will put you in a much better position to ride through the afternoon without falling into the low blood glucose pit. A couple of rice crackers spread with vegemite and sliced tomato may be low in kilojoules but are unlikely to have an impact in sustaining energy and vitality throughout the day. Swap the rice cracker for an oatcake or slice of grainy bread, and the vegemite for peanut butter, avocado or low fat cheese and you’ll be satisfied for much longer.

A combination of low GI carbohydrate, some good fat, and some lean protein, in the ratio of approx 40%:20-30%:30-40% is the key to constructing meals to reduce the desire to snack on junk between meals.

Peaks and troughs in energy is the result of fluctuating blood sugar levels in the body influenced by the quality of carbohydrate we eat. Carbohydrate is necessary for energy and concentration and must therefore be included in the diet but it’s important to understand that some carbohydrate raises blood sugar levels quickly causing a “rush” soon to be followed by a rapid slump while other foods raise blood sugar levels slowly providing a slow steady energy stream that can be sustained over a long period of time. The measure of how quickly food raises blood sugar levels is called the “glycemic index”.

For a quick check on the GI of carbohydrates visit: www.glycemicindex.com

The analogy to saving money is one we can all understand — “the more money you invest, the greater the return”. In the case of food you have to eat more quality kilojoules at the start of the day to save more at the end. The net result is an overall kilojoule saving and weight loss.

The following recommended alternative foods may be higher in kilojoules than those they are replacing but they will “stick” in the system longer and reduce cravings for other foods.

  • Drink a maximum of 2 cups of coffee a day made with skimmed milk.

  • Drink water throughout the day (at room temperature). Warm water is good during the colder months.

  • Eat somewhere other than at your desk

  • Avoid soft drinks, including diet and energy drinks

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Flavoured tuna

Judy Davie

By Judy Davie

“I make a sandwich every day for lunch with canned tuna. I’ve noticed there are a number of flavoured varieties on the market. Are they any good?” — Marie

For convenience and variety there’s nothing terribly bad with the gourmet tuna in the supermarkets, although gram for gram they contain around 20% less tuna and cost between 5 and 20% more.

The missing 20% tuna is made up with fillers and flavours which, whilst not harmful, would be fresher and healthier if you added them yourself.

Some have a small amount of sugar which, albeit small, is hardly necessary. If you have time to flavour tuna in spring water then it’s always better to do it yourself. With a range of herbs and spices in your cupboard it’s easy and fun to create your own.

Or simply copy the ones in the cans. Spicy chilli, fresh tomato and oregano, lemon and oregano, lemon and pepper, sweet chilli, sweet corn and lemon, tomato and olive, garlic and mustard are just a few I’ve seen and none of them are too hard to copy to justify the extra expense.

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Dance away the calories

Diet Club

Have you ever tried going to do a couple of dance classes instead of going to the gym all the time?

I used to weigh 80 kilos, then I started going to funky jazz classes and the weight dropped off me! Of course I was eating right — I was going to the gym once a week and doing a high energy dance class once a week also.

In no time at all I got right down to 55kilos. I was enjoying dancing so much that in the end I ditched the gym and just did dance class. Because I had lost all that weight (and I was maintaining it because I was exercising all the time) I could go out and have the occasional Maccas with my nieces and nephews.

Don’t be afraid to go out and try something different. The gym can get a bit boring sometimes, so can just going for walks. Go and do some dance classes — there are a lot of dance studios where you can do beginner classes. You meet a lot of new friends as well as losing all that extra weight!

— Kristy

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Cracked lips

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I was brainwashed by a cult

Cindy Ferricks thought all her prayers had been answered when she joined the spiritualist sect Soul Freedom. Intelligent and articulate, the 46-year-old mum-of-three was keen to improve her psychic powers and to broaden her knowledge of the paranormal. But Cindy now describes her experience with Soul Freedom as a “living nightmare”.

“I trusted them with my life and they turned out to be nothing but a manipulative money-making cult. They’re destroying lives and ripping families apart,” Cindy says, her body shaking with anger.

“They prey on the vulnerable and poison their minds. But I didn’t know the full extent of how they operated until I joined the inner circle. What I witnessed still sends chills up and down my spine.”

Cindy has broken her silence to reveal the true nature of the sect, which is based in the old goldmining town of Mount Morgan, near Rockhampton. Among her disturbing allegations:

  • Exorcisms were regularly carried out on people whose “souls have been contaminated by dark, satanic forces”.

  • New recruits were given new identities and kept in “safe houses”, where they were brainwashed into believing their spouses were evil … liars, gamblers, even child molesters.

  • The death of members was celebrated, as they would provide a spiritual link to the “other side” and leave the sect an inheritance.

Read Cindy’s shocking story in this week’s Woman’s Day (on-sale July 9)

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Inside Katie’s nightmare

Katie Holmes’s fairytale marriage is under new pressure as she fights with husband Tom Cruise over her close friendship with Victoria Beckham. Insiders say the Hollywood couple have had a series of blazing rows, as Tom becomes increasingly concerned about Posh’s power over his wife.

Until recently, Tom’s been Katie’s biggest influence, transforming her from a giggly teenager into a sophisticated woman. However, her recent cropped hairstyle was encouraged by Posh, who Tom feels doesn’t have his wife’s best interests at heart.

“Tom has always said that he likes long hair,” says the insider, who adds that he’s also worried about Posh’s influence on Katie when it comes to fashion.

“The tragedy is that one area in which nobody should take Posh’s advice is fashion. Katie is naturally stunning and doesn’t need hotpants or trendy haircuts to look great. Following Victoria’s advice makes her look cheap, but she’s desperate for approval.

Those close to Katie say she’s furious over Tom’s jealousy…

For the full story see this week’s Woman’s Day (on-sale July 9)

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