Having always been close to my older brother Sean, the day I looked forward to the most in my life was the day he was due to arrive home from his long working holiday in the UK.
I’d only been 17 when he’d left, so now I was almost 20 we would get to do everything we’d talked about growing up: going out to pubs, travelling together, and I even wanted him to set me up with some of his friends!
But I was even more excited when Sean arrived home a surprise fiancée. None of us had even imagined! And now, not only would I have my beloved brother back, but the sister I’d always wanted as well. I thought it could well be the most memorable day of my life.
As it turned out, I was right — but for all the wrong reasons.
It quickly became obvious to me that Anne might not be the girl Sean thought she was — she was bossy, sullen, and nothing that Sean ever did was good enough. And he did everything she wanted!
He changed industries because she wasn’t happy with the money he made, moved suburbs because she didn’t want to live near us, and bought a new car because his old one was too old. She was so conceited. Sean was her slave, never doing anything without her approval.
So much for awaiting his return! Within three months of his being back in Australia, I spoke to him less than when he’d been overseas. I never, ever saw him — she made sure of that.
English Anne wanted to stay in Australia so, for the time being at least, there was little chance that he would actually leave for good. But as the months went by, I realised that he could be on another planet and I’d probably feel closer to him.
As the wedding drew near, with Sean barely having even a say in his own special day, I knew it was time to take action. Sean was head-over-heels, so he just didn’t see what was happening. I had to save him from himself and find a way to get rid of Anne!
As it happened, not long after that, one of my best friends had a hen’s party. It was one of those boozy affairs with lots of nightclubs and flirting with lots of different men, and it gave me an idea.
I quickly suggested to Anne that, as her future sister-in-law, I should throw her a hen’s party of her own. Anne was quite enthusiastic about the idea, and I promised to organise the whole thing. I just didn’t tell her what I was organising.
Through my network of friends, I found out where the sleaziest nightclubs were and planned our night. I also invited as many single male friends as I could trust, telling them of my secret plan: I was going to get them all to seduce Anne! Considering how conceited she was, with a little bit of alcohol I was hoping she wouldn’t be able to resist all of the attention.
On the night of the party, I was buying Anne drinks constantly. Anne loved being the centre of so much male attention that she didn’t even seem to care how drunk she was getting.
By the time we arrived at the pub where all the boys were supposed to be, she was really drunk. She was also quite attractive, and the men really did go for her. A swarm of handsome young men crowded around Anne as soon as we reached the dance floor, and I quickly got out my phone and made the call — Sean needed to come and pick his fiancée up; she was behaving disgracefully. Sean said he would be right down.
Anne was so drunk by this stage she wasn’t even choosy: the first guy who tried to pick her up quickly found himself in a passionate embrace, and then she moved onto another one, and Sean walked through the door only a few seconds later.
Needless to say, he was crushed, and it was a bad break up. I almost felt bad for what I had done, until I remembered what I had actually saved Sean from. 18 months later, Anne is now back in the UK and Sean is seeing someone he met at work. He’s truly happier with her than he ever was with Anne.
He’s never suspected my involvement in his break-up. I still hope he never finds out that I deliberately set up his fiancée.
Picture: Getty Images. Posed by models.
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