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Surviving (and that is the right word) the Silly Season

Home survival

Did you know that you’re a whopping five times more likely to be injured at home than in work – and car – related accidents combined? Here are 10 commonsense tips to reducing your risk over the holidays.

1 Don’t trip Secure carpet edges and put non-slip mats under rugs. Tie electrical cords together and run them along skirting boards. Pick up clutter – tiny, wheeled toys are the worst offenders. Wipe up anything you’ve spilled on the floor immediately. Place rubber mats in showers and baths, and install hand grips. Put nightlights near bedrooms and bathrooms. Install movement detector lights outside, especially down dark side paths.

2 Lock up poisons Store all drugs in a secure box where children can’t reach them. Keep household cleaners in a lockable cupboard. Never store toxic substances, e.g. methylated spirits, in old food or drink containers.

3 Install smoke detectors Change the batteries twice a year. Make sure everyone in the household understands what to do in a fire. Keep at least two fire extinguishers: one in the kitchen, and one at the other end of the house. Check them regularly and replace when they expire.

4 Check for circuit breakers These prevent death or injury from electrocution by instantly shutting off the power if any appliance overheats or comes into contact with water. They are mandatory in new houses, but if you live in an older-style home, you’ll need to get an electrician to install them.

5 Wear safety goggles They are vital for avoiding eye injury in everyday tasks, e.g. lawn-mowing.

6 Fence any pool Ask your council for requirements in your area. You should also have life preservers and a lockable cabinet for pool chemicals.

7 Buy a strong, lightweight ladder Keep it in a convenient spot to reduce the odds of someone clambering up on a chair or other unsuitable surface.

8 Purchase power-boards These are a far safer option for extending outlet capacity than overburdening double adapters.

9 Keep a torch near everyone’s bed Check the batteries regularly. If your area is subject to electricity failures, buy a large hands-free ‘dolphin’-style one and keep it in the kitchen.

10 Never underestimate kids’ curiosity – or speed Before any littlies come to visit, cover exposed power points with plastic safety shields, tuck curtain and blind cords out of reach, and store plastic bags on the top shelf of the linen press, or in a high kitchen cupboard.

Lock any upstairs windows. Put a safety gate or other sturdy blockade at the top and bottom of staircases, and across driveways or paths that lead to the street. Ensure that top-heavy furniture, like a bookshelf, is plugged to the wall with safety angle-arms, available for a couple of dollars at any hardware store.

Don’t leave kids unattended in a garage, kitchen or bathroom. Remove any ornamental dishes with nuts, sweets or knick-knacks that might be choking hazards. This is also a good idea if you have pets, especially dogs.

YOUR SAY: What rules do you have in place to keep safe and avoid accidents? Tell us below.

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Brisbane golfer: I got banned from golf for becoming a woman

By Julie Hayne

Pictures: Paul Broben

Born Don Asher, Dasher struck a bunker at her golf course after turning up dressed as a woman.

Teeing off for a game of golf at the prestigious Wynnum Golf Club in Brisbane was nothing new for dad of one Don Asher ? but when “Dasher” arrived on the course in a dress, all hell broke loose.

“I don’t think the club had ever struck a transgender player before,” says Dasher ? who was born Don Asher but is in the early stages of undergoing a sex change.

“I was playing off the men’s tees, so there was a bit of a kerfuffle when I turned up in women’s attire. I was told that if I wanted to play, I was to dress like a man and act like a man. I was also told the club would not accept that I was transgender unless I could produce a certificate showing I had had a sex change operation.”

Sitting on the verandah of that same club, Dasher opens up about her painful past and how having her gender ticked as “male” on her birth certificate almost 53 years ago was “like being sentenced to a life of solitary confinement”.

“From my earliest memories as a child, I could never believe that I had been born a boy. I’ve been religious all my life and there’s been hardly a day where I haven’t asked God why He delivered me in this package,” she says.

Have your say below…

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Tom Cruise and John Mayer’s risky business

While their women work hard on the stage and screen, Tom and John enjoy a little flirty fun.

While all eyes were on Jennifer Aniston at the Marley & Me premiere, John Mayer’s attention was obviously elsewhere — namely on a reporter!

John flirted unashamedly with Thea Andrews from US program Entertainment Tonight as he talked about Jen’s recent nude cover for men’s magazine GQ.

“I sort of told myself in the car that I was going to talk about dogs and movies and fonts,” he joked as he put his arm around Thea and leant in for a kiss.

With his reputation for being stand-offish in interviews, onlookers were shocked to see John get so touchy-feely with the beautiful journalist.

The flirtation is nothing short of a slap in the face for Jen, who has come out openly saying how much she adores John.

The 39-year-old actress poured out her feelings in an interview earlier this month.

“He’s a rare one. He is extraordinary and it’s wonderful to watch him,” she gushed. “The way his brain works and the way he thinks thoughts … it’s beautiful.”

For the full story, see this week’s Woman’s Day (on sale December 22).

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The end of the world’s greatest murder mystery?

**By Philip Koch

When wealthy socialite Sunny von Bülow died this month after 28 years in a coma, she took the secret of that fateful night to her grave. Was it an accidental overdose, a suicide attempt or something far more sinister?**

She was the gorgeous US heiress nicknamed for her sunny disposition and famed for her millions, but behind the glamorous facade lay a web of jealousy and betrayal, which spawned one of the most sensational court cases of all time and ripped high society apart.

Even after her recent death, Martha “Sunny” Crawford von Bülow continues to fascinate a world captivated by the mystery of what really happened to one of the world’s richest women when she slipped into an irreversible coma on December 21, 1980.

Despite two court cases, a Hollywood blockbuster film starring Glenn Close and Jeremy Irons and hundreds of lurid headlines, no-one really knows what happened to Sunny von Bülow during Christmas celebrations at her palatial home.

What is indisputable is that Sunny was found lying on the bathroom floor of her Newport, Rhode Island, mansion almost exactly 28 years ago, unconscious and unresponsive. She was taken to hospital but she never again regained consciousness. She had been found in a similar state 12 months before but was revived. That time, doctors said the coma was the result of hypoglycaemia (low blood sugar) and advised her to follow a strict diet, limit sugar and avoid alcohol. But her husband Claus was later accused of causing her collapse by injecting Sunny with insulin, an accusation repeated 12 months later when Sunny lapsed into a coma for the second time.

While Sunny remained unconscious, her case became an international cause célèbre after her two children from her first marriage to Prince Alfred von Auersperg of Austria — Alexander and Ala — became convinced their stepfather Claus was responsible for their mother’s coma.

For the full story, see this week’s Woman’s Day (on sale December 22).

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Bob gets his own show: Is he too young?

Aged just five, Bob Irwin is to follow in his big sister’s footsteps and host his own show, but is he becoming a mini-Steve too soon?

He’s only just reached school age but “Baby Bob” Irwin is set to become a bigger star than his big sister Bindi, with news he’s been called up to host his own show next year.

Bob, who celebrated his 5th birthday on December 1 with a dinosaur-themed party at the Irwin family’s Australia Zoo, is said to be “in the preproduction stages” of making his new show.

An Irwin source told Sydney’s Sun Herald newspaper last week, “It’s clear that Robert is being primed to appear on television more frequently” and that he is being groomed to continue his family’s showbiz legacy.

The bubbly little boy has already appeared on the new season of his sister’s hit show, Bindi: The Jungle Girl.

But while Bindi has lived her life under the spotlight, first appearing on her dad’s TV show at just two years old, experts predict that Bob’s striking resemblance to his legendary dad may place too much expectation on the young child.

For the full story, see this week’s Woman’s Day (on sale December 22).

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Bec and Lleyton’s baby joy

Already known as the Aussie Posh and Becks, the celebrity couple go one step further and name their baby boy Cruz.

Bec and Lleyton Hewitt were given a wonderful early Christmas present with the birth of a gorgeous baby boy, after the former actress went into a surprise early labour.

Bec, 25, and Lleyton, 27, welcomed baby Cruz on December 11, a good three weeks before Bec’s scheduled due date.

“All are doing well and are very excited about the new addition to the family,” the couple announced last week.

“It’s great, especially a boy. Everybody wanted a boy,” Lleyton’s grandfather Max Hewitt told Sydney newspaper, The Daily Telegraph.

Bec appeared to be expecting a premature birth, revealing last month that she was already considering an early arrival.

“You just don’t know if it’s going to be a middle of the night labour, or if it’s going to be daytime, or am I going to be out and about and my water breaks,” a nervous Bec mused.

For the full story, see this week’s Woman’s Day (on sale December 22).

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In the mag – December 29, 2008

Issue on sale Monday December 22, 2008

Bec and Lleyton’s baby joy

Already known as the Aussie Posh and Becks, the celebrity couple go one step further and name their baby boy Cruz…

Newton family’s first Christmas with baby Sam

TV’s first family gather together to celebrate…

Bob gets his own show: Is he too young?

Aged just five, Bob Irwin is to follow in his big sister’s footsteps and host his own show, but is he becoming a mini-Steve too soon?

Tom Cruise and John Mayer’s risky business

While their women work hard on the stage and screen, Tom and John enjoy a little flirty fun.

The end of the world’s greatest murder mystery?

When wealthy socialite Sunny von Bülow died this month after 28 years in a coma, she took the secret of that fateful night to her grave. Was it an accidental overdose, a suicide attempt or something far more sinister?

  • Seafood Christmas for 8:

Caprese salad

  • Festive chocolate gifts:

Rich chocolate and nut truffles

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Newton family’s first Christmas with baby Sam

By Jenny Brown

Pictures: Nick Leary.

Styling: Pip Cook. Interior Styling: Virginia and Celia Dowzer.

TV’s first family gather together to celebrate.

Adorable Sam Welsh doesn’t quite understand what the fuss is about, but sitting on his famous grandfather’s knee — their moon-faces both beaming — he knows he’s safe and loved.

It’s the first Christmas for Bert and Patti Newton’s first grandchild. And even for a family that goes crackers around the festive season, Sam’s presence makes the celebrations extra special.

“He has really changed our lives,” smiles doting “Nanna” Patti. “Bert and I have always loved Christmas — we’re perhaps a bit over the top — but having Sam around makes the whole thing even better.”

Surrounded by mysterious packages, paper and brightly coloured ribbon, the Newton clan — including Sam’s mother Lauren, Matthew Newton and son-in-law Matt Welsh — is introducing its newest member to Christmas rituals. There’s midnight mass, snacks for Santa, gift-giving around the tree, a large roast turkey lunch with all the trimmings, a toast to absent loved ones — and perhaps a sing-along with friends.

“But I don’t really know,” jokes funnyman Bert, who recently turned 70. “I’m not the officer in charge of Christmas activities so whatever I tell you, I’m probably wrong. I’ve learnt to leave the frilly stuff to Santa’s helpers, Patti and Lauren…”

For the full story, see this week’s Woman’s Day (on sale December 22).

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My husband booked me as an escort

My husband Don and I had been married for almost 10 years when our relationship and our lives were changed irrevocably.

We married young — I was only 18 and Don was 19 when we tied the knot. We were very much in love — more with the idea of being in love than each other, in hindsight. But the first few years were great.

We both had good jobs that paid well and we weren’t in a great rush to have kids so we had a lot of disposable income. We travelled overseas — often spending months at a time in France and Italy as well as South East Asia and other exotic places. We surprised each other with gifts on a regular basis and we enjoyed all the spontaneity that life had to offer us.

That was until our luck started to run out. It began with Don losing his job. He always swore blind to me that it was due to the company falling on hard times, but I was told later that it was linked to a sexual harassment allegation against Don that the company wanted to quash as quickly as possible. Either way, it meant that our comfortable joint income was slashed.

We still managed on my salary but it times were a lot tighter. Don didn’t seem too eager to get another job and this caused tension between us. The stress got so bad that what started out as a couple of drinks with the girls on a Friday night to ‘vent’ became a full-blown drinking problem and I also lost my job.

I was at my wits’ end. One night, while in a teary mess, I called my best friend Sandra and went over to her place. I stayed the night and awoke to find her kissing a man goodbye at the front door. When I said that I didn’t know she was seeing someone, she laughed at me.

“That wasn’t a date,” she explained. “That was a client. I had him booked before you showed up so I couldn’t cancel on him.”

I wasn’t as shocked as curious. And my reaction surprised me more than finding out that one of my good friends was an escort girl.

“How much do you make a week?” I asked.

“I can make anything up to $5000 without really working too hard,” she replied in an off-handed way.

I soon realised that I envied this independent and fairly wealthy woman that I had hardly known at all over the years we’d been friends.

Before I knew it, I was swept up in a world of money and prestige that far outweighed anything I’d known before. I had my drinking under control and I felt better than ever.

Sandra was a great guide into the world of the escort and she was good enough to pass on some of her more approachable clients to me until I got used to things and built a client base of my own. I was surprised (after muddling through my first couple of appointments fairly clumsily) how matter-of-fact it all became.

I was earning twice what Don and I had made combined and I felt no real guilt about it. My clients were faithful and respectful gentlemen, not the grimy perverts that I imagined when I’d thought of call girls before I discovered Sandra’s secret.

Some of my clients just wanted to cuddle and talk for an hour or more and I really felt as though I was helping people in some small way. I worked out of hotel rooms and, with some of my more trusted clientele, out of their own homes.

I was given expensive jewellery at Christmas or sometimes for no reason at all and I was often taken to the best Sydney restaurants and events that only the very wealthy ever experience.

I told Don that I had landed a business consulting job working mainly with entrepreneurial types which is why I was on call day and night to cater to their every whim. He had no complaints as he no longer needed to even pretend to look for work.

New clients would only become aware of me via word of mouth. My business card was only to be passed on to trusted colleagues of my existing client base. Even then, my card said “Conveyancer” on it. The potential client would then email me at an address that I had set up for clients only, using terms such as: “I would like to make an appointment to discuss the sale of my property” and we would go from there.

One night, I received an email from my first new client in some time. I wasn’t really looking for any new business but he sounded sweet and polite and I thought, “Why not?” I was to meet him at a well-known hotel overlooking Hyde Park.

He had given me the room number, and I always dress to fit into the places I’m sent to, so I just glided right through the foyer and up to the room.

When I knocked on the door this particular night, I heard the man inside shout, “Won’t be a sec”. My stomach lurched.

I ran back around to the lifts and carefully peeked around the corner to see the man I’d married 10 years before appear at the door!

He looked this way and that for the escort girl he’d ordered — the one who just happened to be me on this night.

I wondered how many others there’d been and the cynical voice in the back of my head laughed at the fact that I’d funded my husband’s infidelity with my own.

Neither of us has confronted the other about that night. Whether Don ever found out that he had contacted his own wife for a clandestine meeting I don’t know. I’m still working, though somewhat less these days. Don has since moved out and, funnily enough, he’s working as a conveyancer!

Names in this story have been changed.

Your say: Have your say about this true confession below…

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My Kris Kringle gift was… revenge!

My friends and I have a tradition ? every year we give each other presents to a value of about $50.00, but we don’t tell each other who it’s from ? even years later. One year, there were five of us, plus five boyfriends, in the Kris Kringle draw.

When I got my best friend Katie in the draw, who lately had been acting weird and nasty towards me, I set out to find her an el crappo present in $2.00 shops.

At the same time, my boyfriend Paul had started to avoid me. He would only come for dinner or invite me to his house on Sunday nights.

When it was the day to exchange gifts, I suggested that everyone should come over to my house where I would put up a little Christmas tree.

After everyone had put their presents under the tree, I said that we should open them tomorrow because I had a Christmas party idea. In an attempt to get my boyfriend’s attention, I suggested that all the girls come as Santa’s little helpers while all the guys come as elves. This was greeted with very enthusiastic response!

Later that day, I bought a sexy Santa’s little helper dress. Then at night, I thought about the presents and which one was mine. So, I crept out of bed and carefully went through them all. One of the presents was from my boyfriend Paul to Katie. And it had a saucy love letter attached! I couldn’t believe it. Paul was cheating on me with Katie. But I had to find out for sure whether the letter was a joke or not.

Having bought Katie some crappy chocolate for part of her present, I opened up the box and thought of what to put in it. Then I remembered ? I had been trying to go green for the environment. So I went out into the garden and brought back several worms from my compost heap.

They squished perfectly into the chocolates, which I then wrapped up so no one would be the wiser.

The next day, we exchanged presents. Katie, being a chocolate lover, started eating hers straight away ? without noticing the worms! Having received a beautiful gold bracelet myself, I was in an extra happy mood.

When I went up to put my bracelet away in my room, I heard muffled sex noises. I slowly opened the door and saw Katie, in her Santa’s little helper dress, on top of Paul!

So, my suspicions were confirmed. I was thankful that I had put the worms into Katie’s chocolates, but I still had to think of something for Paul. Then I remembered what someone did for revenge in another true confession I’d read!

Paul had a swimming pool, so I poured half a bottle of Chlorine in it. It worked like a charm. A few days later, I saw Paul and Katie with a nasty rash.

I called Paul and left a message that our relationship was over. Paul called me back and said he had been cheating on me. I forgave him, but the relationship didn’t work. So now I’m single and ready to mingle!

Names in this story have been changed.

Your say: Have your say about this true confession below…

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