So You Think You Can Dance judge Bonnie Lythgoe tells Jordan Baker why she had to leave the love of her life for another man.
At home in Britain, she is the wife of a famous man, but in Australia, Bonnie Lythgoe is best known as the sentimental, motherly judge on So You Think You Can Dance. The show, now in its third season, makes dreams come true for local dancers, but few realise it is also a dream come true for Bonnie.
For decades, she put a promising career, as a dancer and entertainer, on hold so she could support her husband, Nigel Lythgoe, a dancer-turned-creator of television blockbusters such as American Idol. Now, after 35 years, Bonnie has stepped out of his shadow and found a new life – and a new love.
Many women give up their dreams to put their husband’s ambitions first, but few get another chance to realise them as Bonnie has and Australia has given her that. “I’m so thankful,” Bonnie says. “I’m one of the luckiest people ever, to turn my life around.”
In an exclusive interview with The Weekly, she talks about love, sacrifice and the difficult decision to leave her husband for another man after years of attempts at reconciliation. She talks for the first time about their enduring bond and her heartache over his romances with celebrated women such as Jerry Hall, Priscilla Presley and her old friend, Lulu.
At first, Nigel didn’t think she could dance. At least, that was his impression when Bonnie Shawe – known to her family as Bonita – arrived at an audition for the BBC’s Young Generation dance troupe in 1971. The up-and-coming choreographer thought she was “pretty lousy”.
And she thought his moves were too hard but didn’t really care – she went to the audition on a bet and had already proven herself in show business, having starred in 1967’s To Sir, With Love with Sidney Poitier, and been a children’s TV presenter. A producer overruled Nigel, saying Bonnie’s big personality would be perfect for the show.
As part of Young Generation, she supported ’70s superstars such as Olivia Newton-John and Cliff Richard. At first, there was no attraction to Nigel; she was dating his flatmate while he squired young dancers around town. They eventually struck up a friendship, which turned into romance and a proposal, much to the horror of her Jewish father, who never imagined his son-in-law would dance and wear make-up. When they married, Nigel started putting Bonnie in the back row to avoid playing favourites. In hindsight, she admits, that should have rung alarm bells.
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To read more of Bonnie’s exclusive interview pick up the March issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly out now with Glenn McGrath and Sara Leonardi on the cover.