Eight years ago my long-term boyfriend and I broke up under amicable circumstances. He seemed to move right on to a new relationship but I sat around the house wondering how I was ever going to meet anyone new.
At the age of 40 I felt I was past my prime and I didn’t have any clues about where I could go to meet eligible, single men. I wasn’t interested in going to nightclubs or wine bars. All my friends were married so I had no-one to go out with, even if I had somewhere to go.
Saturday nights passed uneventfully while I watched television at home. I started to fear that I was going to be companionless for the rest of my life. It hadn’t occurred to me that a great number of single people are quite happy living by themselves, leaving it to fate to meet the right person one day. I wasn’t used to being by myself and I decided to do something about it.
It started with a fairly innocent advertisement in the local newspaper. I did get some replies but I didn’t seem to click with anybody. I was also quite surprised that a large number of the respondents admitted they were married and that they were looking for a diversion. I was rather downhearted by this turn of events and decided that the competition in lonely hearts columns was too great.
I mentioned my dilemma to a male friend who showed me a sex magazine that he purchased regularly. He suggested that I answer one of the personal advertisements in that. I was quite shocked by his suggestion and also by the type of personal ads featured in the magazine. It certainly seemed to cater to every sort of weird taste.
I was too scared to answer any of the ads that I saw so I decided to bite the bullet and put in my own. I was curious to see what would happen. If I didn’t like a reply, I didn’t have to answer.
My ad said I was “a 35-year-old, ready for anything”. I certainly received a lot of replies — about 30. I was surprised by the very polite and respectful letters. Some of the photos also looked quite interesting. Suddenly I felt the thrill of adventure!
I excluded all the replies that obviously came from married men and then I replied to the most appealing letters from the rest. I never once felt that I was doing anything dangerous. When I met the respondents they always acted absolutely normal in every way.
I met five men in total. After first meeting in a coffee shop we would decide if we wanted to meet again. All of them were very sexy company but I was back to square one — without a partner. Then the final letter arrived.
It was quite a funny letter and I liked the look of the man in the photo. He said that he was separated from his wife and was looking for company as he never went out. I replied and he invited me to dinner in a restaurant.
From the first moment I met him I felt comfortable with him. He was the same age as me (40, not 35!) and we had the same interests and outlook on life. In fact we were perfect for each other! Within a month we had moved in together and we have lived together ever since.
Although some would feel that our meeting was not auspicious, I would have to say that I couldn’t hope to meet a more faithful partner. He is the most attentive man I have ever met. The only problem is that I tend to flinch when anyone asks me how we met. I usually mumble something about meeting him at a party and then change the subject!