Christian and I had been best friends for ages when he was horribly dumped by his long-term girlfriend. I’d just got out of a relationship myself and been absolutely crushed by it.
We were together in my apartment one night, drinking and complaining about how cruel love was, when one thing led to another. By the end of the week, we were a couple.
Things were great at the beginning. It helped that we had a long history and understood each other, but then Christian began to get really needy. He began hinting about marriage and babies. It was just too fast for me. I knew it was a result of him being dumped, but as a friend, I felt really bad about discouraging his crazy ideas, so I didn’t. But I was slowly feeling trapped, so I subconsciously began to distance myself from him.
That made things even worse. He would text me up to 10 times a day. One day, he arrived on my doorstep and asked me what was wrong. I didn’t have the heart to tell him it was him, so I did the worst thing possible and said I thought I was a lesbian.
I lied and said that my last relationship had really made me distrust men and that I couldn’t picture a future with a man any more. I went on to say that I had been interested in women for a really long time but fear of rejection had made me never pursue the idea.
Christian was surprised, but took it really well because it wasn’t his fault. He turned into my best friend again and was very supportive. He even tried to set me up with his lesbian friends!
I went along with it for a few months. We would go to the mall and “check out” girls together or we’d research articles on the Web about lesbianism. It was really good to have my best friend back, even though I felt bad about lying to him. In the meantime, he was out and about and met a girl he really liked. After a few dates, they were an item. I was happy that he had moved on.
I eventually met a guy I was interested in and told Christian that the lesbian thing was a phase and I’d finally met the guy who could turn things around for me. At that point, he was so delighted with his relationship that he was happy for me!
Because of that massive white lie, I managed to salvage our friendship. I can’t feel bad about that. It only cost me a few months of singledom … and a long-term guilt trip!
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