Eloise Tomkins, 39, Melbourne, Vic, shares a real-life story of recovering her true self after undertaking a form of therapy she’d once labelled “far-fetched”.
Prince Harry’s face flashed across my TV screen.
“Unfortunately, London’s a trigger for me,” he said to Oprah, who was interviewing him.
On the TV show, The Me You Can’t See, he went on to explain how he’d undergone something called EMDR therapy, also known as rapid eye movement therapy.
“Interesting,” I said out loud, as my Italian greyhound Zeke nuzzled his nose into me.
It was June 2021, and for years I’d come across EMDR therapy in my work as a psychologist.
The therapist moved their hands in front of a client’s face, in what is known as bilateral stimulation.
This helped them to process trauma that had previously not been dealt with and had become blocked in their body.
Me, before I addressed my trauma.
Harry said that EMDR had helped him with his grief over losing his mother, Princess Diana, and with the PTSD he suffered after serving in the British military.
In my psychology training, I’d been taught talking therapies, like Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, and had always thought EMDR was a bit far-fetched.
But after watching Harry on the show, I did some research, and then a few months later, I enrolled in a ten-day intensive course to learn how to administer it.
I was stunned at how quickly I started seeing results in my clients.
During our sessions, I instructed my clients to mention distressing thoughts and memories, then using various bilateral stimuli, like waving my hands in front of their faces, or getting them to tap their thighs, it helped their bodies to process the trauma and put the memory into a box.
The triggers became neutralised.
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Knowing I had unresolved trauma from my own childhood, I decided to try it myself.
One client, who had been in a car accident, couldn’t even get into a car without his trauma being triggered, when he first came to see me.
By the end of his EMDR therapy, he was driving again.
It didn’t only help PTSD sufferers, but those with anxiety too.
One woman I saw suffered from crippling anxiety during public speaking.
Through a few sessions, we worked out this stemmed from her father always saying she wasn’t good enough when she was a child.
Once we used EMDR on that memory, her anxiety went away.
Knowing I had unresolved trauma from my own childhood, I decided to try it myself.
After recovering my confidence, I booked an appointment with the hairdresser and told her to cut off all my hair. It was always something I’d wanted to do!
I went for nine one-hour sessions with a coach called Angela and, afterwards, my confidence soared.
To celebrate the new me, I booked an appointment with my hairdresser, Breanna.
“Cut it all off,” I said, when I was in the chair.
Today I help other women like me turn their self-doubt into self-confidence!
It was something I’d always wanted to do but had never felt brave enough to.
Afterwards all my friends commented saying I finally looked like me.
Now, I have my own business, helping other women like me turn their self-doubt into self-confidence and it’s all thanks to His Royal Highness, Prince Harry.
