I had been dating my now-husband for nearly two years when I finally met his brother’s long term girlfriend. She lived in South Korea and we had always missed each other during her various trips to Australia. I was really looking forward to meeting her, thinking about how our children would probably grow up as cousins, and how we’d enjoy many shared Christmases and holidays together for years to come.
I walked in the door, stuck out my hand and smiled broadly, introducing myself. She paused, stared at the ceiling, and reluctantly proffered a limp hand, mumbling something that may have been ‘hi’ beneath her breath. I felt as though I’d been slapped across the face. What had I done to deserve such rudeness? I honestly had no idea.
Despite the fact that my husband’s mother had cooked up an amazing meal to celebrate the day we had all finally met, Sara behaved like a spoilt child the entire day. She refused to speak to us, ignoring our questions and rolling her eyes at our conversation. At the same time, she chatted happily with my husband’s parents, so we knew that we were clearly the ones at whom her behaviour was aimed. Eventually, she disappeared off into the upstairs bedrooms and didn’t return.
We were baffled. My husband, who had always gotten on well with her, couldn’t understand it. I was personally devastated as I had always gotten along well with my brother-in-law and really wanted to have a good relationship with the woman who was likely to become his wife.
The week that followed was stressful and upsetting as we tried to speak with my brother-in-law and Sara about why she had been so rude. Eventually, we discovered that it was all based in jealousy about our engagement and upcoming wedding. As Sara had been dating my brother-in-law for almost seven years, she felt that the occasion should have been hers.
Our attempts to resolve the situation were fruitless, culminating in an email from Sara that abused me and my husband personally, while making threats that she would ‘take us down’. I simply couldn’t understand how a grown woman could behave like such a spoilt, childish teenager.
Our wedding was a few short weeks later. To our relief, she didn’t come as she was back in South Korea. Instead, my husband and I plotted to get rid of her. I had six single, attractive and fun friends coming along, so I told them all about the situation and how lovely my brother-in-law was but how horrible his girlfriend was, and asked them if they’d consider paying him some ‘extra’ attention. We then all took the opportunity throughout the day to ply him with copious amounts of champagne, to the extent that he could barely manage to deliver his best man’s speech.
One short email with attachments in reply to the one she sent us was all it took, and the relationship was over. Three months down the track, my brother-in-law isn’t speaking to us, and while I do feel bad for causing him pain, I honestly believe that he would have been miserable with her for the rest of his life. Most amazingly, my husbands’ parents supported us in what we had done. We could all see that he’s a great guy, and she’s a psycho. Hopefully one day he’ll forgive us, and will see we meant only for the best.
Names have been changed. Picture posed by models.
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