Simone Platt, 22 , shares her harrowing true story:
Trigger warning: This post deals with sexual violence. If you are affected by any of the issues, contact 1800 737 732 or visit the 1800 RESPECT website here.
I heard the door go and moments later my dad walked in with someone following him.
“Simone, meet your brother Matthew,” my dad said. “He’ll be staying with us a while.
“Hi,” I replied shyly.
“Good to meet you at last,” Matthew, 25, smiled.
I knew that before Dad had got together with Mum, he’d had a son with another woman.
I’d always wondered what he was like and what it would be like to have a big brother, so I was excited he’d be living with us.
Matthew was down on his luck. He’d lost his job and was struggling financially, so Dad said he could stay with us while he got himself back on his feet.
Although Matthew was 10 years older, we got on brilliantly.
When I got home from school, I’d hang out with him.
We’d watch TV together or listen to music.
If I’d had a bad day, I’d talk to him about it.
He always made me feel better and gave good advice.
I liked having a big brother to look up to.
I felt like he’d protect me.
With Mum and Dad often out, I ended up looking after my younger siblings a lot.
One day, I’d cooked their favourite dinner of chicken nuggets, chips and beans and was about to take it out to them when Matthew came into the kitchen.
“I’ll give them their dinner,” he said.
“Ok, thanks,” I replied.
They were watching telly and he took their plates in and came back out, closed the door, and locked it.
“Let’s go up to my room,” he said.
I thought we were going to listen to music but when we got there, he threw me onto the bed.
Me at age 15.
Pinning me down, he shoved his hand up my dress and pulled down my underwear.
He forced himself on me with his hand clamped over my mouth.
Afterwards, he acted like nothing had happened.
“What are Mum and Dad going to say?” I said, panicking.
“You’re not going to tell them,” he replied.
So I didn’t.
He attacked me twice more after that. I was so confused and upset.
I didn’t know what to think. All I wanted was my protective big brother back.
My confidence plummeted and I became quiet and withdrawn.
Mum noticed I wasn’t myself.
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
I desperately wanted to tell her but felt too ashamed.
“Nothing, I’m fine,” I answered.
Soon after, Matthew had a huge argument with Dad and walked out.
Dad said he’d gone back to his mum’s and I felt so relieved.
I could finally move on.
But then I missed my period.
I took a pregnancy test and burst into tears when the result was positive.
I was pregnant with my rapist brother’s baby.
Later, I got Mum on her own and sat down with her.
“I’m pregnant,” I admitted.
“Who’s the father?” she demanded.
The result was terrifying. (Image: Getty Images)
I broke down crying and the truth came spilling out.
“Matthew raped me,” I sobbed, and Mum’s jaw dropped.
She held me as I cried, the words I’d been holding in for so long finally spoken.
She called the police and I gave a statement.
Afterwards, I was taken to hospital for a pregnancy scan.
My heart broke as I watched the squirming shape dance across the screen.
My little baby, created out of such hate and pain.
Social services advised that I terminate but I felt torn.
I knew I didn’t want to keep the baby, it was the result of a year of torment.
But I also felt attached to the tiny life growing inside me.
Eventually I realised that the only way for me to move on was to have the abortion, so I agreed.
When I woke after the procedure and realised my baby was no longer there, I felt empty.
That night, I cried myself to sleep.
The foetus was taken away by the police to be DNA tested.
The results confirmed what I already knew – that the baby was Matthew’s child.
A warrant was made for his arrest.
I sobbed on my hospital bed and prayed he would finally pay for what he’d put me through.
My dad was so angry when he found out, he wanted to take matters into his own hands, but I begged him to let justice be served.
Matthew Ali was arrested and charged with three counts of adult sexual activity with a female child family member.
He denied the charges but was convicted on all three counts and jailed for four years and three months.
The court case didn’t provide closure.
I wasn’t in court but Mum called to tell me what he’d got.
“It’s not enough,” I raged, horrified.
Afterwards, I spiralled into depression.
There were times I felt so low I didn’t want to be here anymore.
The police still had the foetus frozen and they tried to contact me to ask what I wanted them to do with it, but I was too upset to think about it.
Two years on, just after my 18th birthday I finally made a decision.
“I’d like the baby to have a funeral,” I told them.
The police arranged everything for me, and a few close family and friends supported me as we buried my baby.
I was glad I got the chance to do the right thing and lay my baby to rest properly.
But it brought everything back and over the next years I continued to suffer from depression and anxiety.
0During that time I started seeing someone and fell pregnant.
The relationship didn’t last but out of it came my child, who is the best thing that’s ever happened to me.
Becoming a mum helped me to heal.
Matthew is out of prison now.
He tried to contact me on Facebook but I blocked him.
I’m determined he won’t make me feel scared again.
I’m stronger now than I was as an innocent teenager.
I still visit the grave of the baby I knew I couldn’t have. It does make me very sad.
1It wasn’t the baby’s fault his father was a rapist.
But then I pick myself up and try to be the best mum I can to the child who’s here and needs me.
Becoming a mum saved me.
It helped me take my life back and now I’m determined to be a survivor rather than a victim.
If you have been affected by the subjects in this article, contact 1800 737 732 or visit the 1800 RESPECT website here.
