Aussies are up in arms over ‘wellness coach’ David Avocado Wolfe spruiking his weird/dangerous beliefs in talks all across Australia.
He’s facing stiff opposition from petitions and even MPs trying to intervene to get his talks blocked.
So, who is he?
“David “Avocado” Wolfe is the rock star and Indiana Jones of the superfoods and longevity universe.”
Well, that’s who he says he is on his website…
Wolfe has made a fortune giving live talks about wellness/endorsing products like miracle oils that stop cancer. You know, the usual.
He also preaches bleach enemas as treatment for Autism and Chiropractic for newborns.
According to his bio, he has “circumnavigated the Earth for decades seeking out the world’s purest foods and waters and leading adventure retreats”.
The pseudo-scientific preacher is now in Australia, whether we want him here or not.
And the fact he goes by the moniker ‘Avocado’ is by no means the most offensive thing about this man. No sir. His ideas are wacky at best, extremely dangerous at worst.
Let’s take a look, shall we?
1. He’s a ‘Flat Earther’
As in, he believes the Earth is flat. Seriously.
2. He’s also anti-gravity
Wolfe, on gravity: “There’s people who have known that gravity is a force that can be displaced. There’s people that have known that since the 50s or even earlier than that. But by screwing up, confusing our mind about things, and giving us incorrect theories we were brain washed into a totally different belief system. That gravity is intrinsic to all matter, we’re fighting gravity, we have to push our way through gravity to launch a craft up into outer space, all this nonsense.”
Maybe he could test his anti-gravity theory out? Just a suggestion.
3. This is his reasoning why there’s salt in the ocean:
“The reason the oceans are salty is to hold the water onto the Earth. If that didn’t happen, the water would levitate right off the Earth and that would be the end of it.”
4. He sells ‘levitational Deer antler spray’
For the bargain price of $75.
Wolfe explains: “It’s a cosmic substance. And it’s an androgenic substance, by the way—very androgenic. And it needs to be taken with respect and understanding, which is why we’ve been getting into this whole thing about estrogenic forces and then androgenic forces. You gotta know that deer antler is an androgenic force. And why? Because it’s cosmic in nature. It’s elevating. It’s levitational in nature. Which actually makes you younger. The forces of levity make you younger.”
5. He’s an ant-vaxxer because of course he is
He preaches there’s “a significant correlation between flu vaccines and a variety of mental disorders.”
6. People are super peeved he’s in Australia
Shadow health minister Walt Secord slammed NSW government for allowing the “taxpayer-funded” visit to go ahead, calling it “irresponsible”.
A petition in Perth was started by med student Denae Sinclair with a very convincing bio:
“David ‘Avocado’ Wolfe is a self-proclaimed ‘Health, Eco, Nutrition, and Natural Beauty Expert’, but he is none of these things. He does not hold any health qualifications, has no published scientific literature, is not a doctor, nurse, scientist or any other health practitioner. He promotes an anti-vaccination, medication-free lifestyle, and is a big part of the emerging crusade against ‘Big Pharma’ and the medical industry. He encourages people with cancer to avoid chemotherapy in favour of ‘natural’ remedies. He is also a ‘Flat Earther’, which means he actually believes the earth is flat.”
It’ll also cost you a whopping $440 to attend his workshop in Perth.
7. He’s also hosting some ‘cacao dance parties’ and nope, we have no idea either
“It wouldn’t be a David Wolfe Oz Tour without a raging cacao party, and this time round we’re taking to it to a whole other level. With the epic party theme of Aztec Gold, join us as we get dosed up on the ultimate party superfood, CaCaO!, and dance the night away in celebration of life (and chocolate) at this no drug and alcohol free party. This is an event for the community of ALL ages.”
Just a few of the things that will feature at this party:
“Sacred Mayan Cacao Ceremony by the one and only David Wolfe” and “Fire Goddess Bella Fuego dazzling us with the golden flame”.
We’re intrigued, we’ll give him that much.
Our advice should we be so bold: Save your money, folks.
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