My date scanned the cocktail menu and sighed. “I don’t know what to order, can you please do it for me?” he asked. I frowned.
I’d just met the guy, how was I supposed to know what he wanted to drink
He gave me a sheepish smile. “My mum always orders for me,” he said.My jaw dropped. He was 33!
The date went from bad to worse when I had to pay for the meal, too. Dating was a minefield.
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I’m a hopeless romantic and was looking for Mr Right so I’d joined all the dating apps. Over five years, I went on hundreds of dates.
Some went well and I wound up dating a few guys for a short while. There was a magician, a personal trainer and a writer. But other dates were disasters from the start.
Like the man who arrived to meet me completely wasted. He was slurring his words and promptly forgot my name.
Guys often portrayed themselves in a certain way but when I met them in person, they were completely different.
Over time, I got disillusioned with the apps. “We need to make dating fun again,” I moaned to my flatmate, Sammi.
Suddenly, I had an idea. “What if we have a house party, and we all invite the random blokes we’ve met on Tinder?” I suggested.
That way, it felt like we were taking the pressure off the date and if it didn’t work out with one man, there were others available.
Valentine’s Day 2022 was coming up, so we arranged it for that weekend and I got 10 of my girlfriends to invite strangers they’d met on dating apps.
Days before the party, I suddenly panicked that there weren’t enough guys, so I swiped right on Tinder and Hinge and wound up inviting 65 more men!
Then, I met a man called Ken at a bar and he invited me out for coffee. I told him about the chaotic singles party I was arranging. “Can I come?” he asked.
“Well, it’s supposed to be just for random strangers we’ve matched with on dating apps,” I said. But I liked him so I decided to bend the rules.
On the day of the party, my girlfriends all arrived first. We were nervous. “What if no-one turns up?” Sammi said.
“What if too many people turn up and they trash the place?” I fretted.
Just then, the doorbell went. Thankfully, the first few guys who arrived were sweet. It set the tone for the rest of the night. In the end, around 10 women were there and 40 men!
Ken arrived with a bottle of tequila and was the life of the party.
I’d set up a phone in the bathroom as a makeshift ‘confessional booth’ and instructed everyone to go in and confess to the camera who they were crushing on.
My motive for this was to find out what Ken thought of me! Thankfully, when he went in he admitted that he thought I was a “cool chick”. “I haven’t met anyone this cool in the city,” he said in the video, as my heart melted.
We wound up getting together that night. Others did, too. It was a big success.
Next morning, I posted the confessional videos on TikTok and it went viral with two million views! When’s the next party? someone wrote. Please do another one! begged another.
So, the following month, I hosted another singles party but this time I booked a venue in town that could hold 500 people. When I posted about it on TikTok, it sold out within 30 minutes. I knew I was onto something then.
I called the events Chaotic Singles Parties and started holding them once a month. Guests loved that everyone was there for the same reason. The rule was that if you come, you have to invite a stranger who you’ve matched with on a dating app.
That way, if someone wasn’t interested in you, they’d just gently say so and then you could move on to the next person
The confessional booth concept from my original party has stayed and I often let people know who’s crushing on them during the night so they have a chance to get together.
I also play ice-breaking games asking questions like, “What’s the worst date you’ve been on?”Each guest gets a gold heart sticker they get to give to their top crush.
In 2022, I hosted 17 parties and this year, I’ve expanded across the country and have amazing sponsors who collaborate with me. I’ve also had a production company contact me about turning my parties into a reality TV show. These events are now my main source of income.
Ken and I are still dating. Focusing on matchmaking for others rather than looking for love for myself has been an unexpected bonus. It lets me be everyone’s wing-woman!
I recently conducted a survey and found that 25 per cent of people who came to my party ended up going on second dates with people they met. I also know of 20 couples who are still together after meeting at one of my events.
I’m proud that I’ve put the fun back into dating. For me, that’s what it’s all about.
