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How to have a good marriage

Couple

Three tricks to keep your relationship happy and strong:

Get gorgeous:

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Everyone knows a couple where one person looks trim, taut and terrific, and the other has let themselves go physically or just doesn’t pay attention to their grooming. This is dangerous territory — it’s difficult to feel attracted to someone who doesn’t seem to think that you’re worth making an effort for.

Be an active listener:

Research from Harvard Medical School says that empathy is critical to a fulfilling, long-term relationship. If your partner feels that you truly understand them, they’re more likely to open up more often. Get into the habit of paraphrasing to show you’re paying attention. Say, for example, “Let me see if I understand you. What you’re saying is…” Offer acknowledgement and support by saying, “I should think that because of [fill in the situation], you feel [frustrated, confused, etc].”

Don’t go to bed angry:

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After an argument, it’s all too easy to turn your back on your partner, pull the blankets over your head, and sulk. However, research from the University of Washington shows that extending an olive branch is a much better idea. A couple’s skill in reconnecting after an argument is critical to a lasting relationship. And if you can’t quite bring yourself to apologise, simply say, “It makes me so upset when we fight. How do you feel?”

Pics: Thinkstock

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