A woman sick of being asked about her future baby plans has made an epic Facebook post that absolutely nails why a woman’s reproductive choices are “none of your business”.
Posting to Facebook with an ultrasound picture nabbed from Google, writer Emily Bingham, started off bold, writing, “Hey everyone!!! Now that I got your attention with this RANDOM ULTRASOUND PHOTO I grabbed from a Google image search, this is just a friendly P.S.A. that people’s reproductive and procreative plans and decisions are none of your business. NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.”
The post continues on to slam the noisy friends and family who pry into baby plans (or lack thereof), “Before you ask the young married couple that has been together for seemingly forever when they are finally gonna start a family … before you ask the parents of an only-child toddler when a Little Brother or Little Sister will be in the works … before you ask a single 30-something if/when s/he plans on having children because, you know, clock’s ticking … just stop. Please stop.”
“You don’t know who is struggling with infertility or grieving a miscarriage or dealing with health issues. You don’t know who is having relationship problems or is under a lot of stress or the timing just isn’t right. You don’t know who is on the fence about having kids or having more kids,” she writes.
“You don’t know who has decided it’s not for them right now, or not for them ever. You don’t know how your seemingly innocent question might cause someone grief, pain, stress or frustration,” added Emily.
“Sure, for some people those questions may not cause any fraught feelings — but I can tell you, from my own experiences and hearing about many friends’ experiences — it more than likely does.”
“Bottom line: Whether you are a wanna-be grandparent or a well-intentioned friend or family member or a nosy neighbour, it’s absolutely none of your business. Ask someone what they’re excited about right now. Ask them what the best part of their day was,” urged Emily.
“If a person wants to let you in on something as personal as their plans to have or not have children, they will tell you. If you’re curious, just sit back and wait and let them do so by their own choosing, if and when they are ready.”
And it seems Emily is not the only one who feels this way, with nearly 50,000 people sharing the post.
“Can I like this a million times?” wrote one user.
“Thank you for posting this! I’m so drained right now from fighting these questions off,” said another.
“Great timing. This comes up daily for me. Grrrr, stop asking me,” wrote a woman.
And we couldn’t agree more. Although well-meaning, sometimes people need to take a little more time to think about how their words might impact the person that they’re speaking to.
