Your new baby has finally arrived and you and your hubby are over the moon but don’t be surprised if your first child isn’t as thrilled as you are.
It can be tough for a toddler to watch a new baby – who does nothing but sleep and feed – arrive into their world and steal their spotlight.
Phoebe Burgess and her NRL star husband, Sam Burgess are parents to Poppy, two-and-a-half and Billy, eight months and are all-too-familiar with this scenario.
Phoebe admits there was a period of adjustment for Poppy when Billy arrived but she had some smart strategies to make the transition as smooth as possible.
Phoebe and Sam Burgess with their newborn, Billy.
(Image: Instagram/@mrsphoebeburgess)
“Poppy and Billy are only 23 months apart, so Poppy was really only just on the cusp of learning to communicate effectively, talk and understand the concept,” explains Phoebe.
“So we read Poppy a very simple story called, Za-Za’s Baby Brother by Lucy Cousins (recommended by child psychologists) about a little zebra family who were bringing home a new baby. And it just prepared her for the idea of it.”
“Then, Billy gave Poppy a great gift when she came to meet him for the first time in hospital,” she continues.
“We also make sure Poppy is equally heard, equally paid attention to, encouraged and cuddled, whenever she starts to get irritated that mum is always attending to the baby. One time I let Billy cry and attended to Poppy first and of her own accord she asked me to look after Billy first as he sounded sad. So I let Poppy make that choice to realise why mummy attends to Billy’s needs when he cries.”
Phoebe follows a Johnson’s bath and bedtime routine with Billy.
(Image: Supplied)The gorgeous 30-year-old and ambassador for Johnson’s Baby also has some pieces of wisdom to share for new mums.
1. Never compare your child to anyone else’s
Every motherhood journey is completely unique. They might be smashing the sleep category while you pull your hair out at night but you might be getting your toddler eating vegetables when that is their challenge. Never assume people have parenthood nailed, no one does!
2. Trust your instincts
You know your child better than anyone. I swear we have an inbuilt radar that alerts us when something is wrong. I’ve always listened to and fought for my gut instinct and it’s always trustworthy. Trust your routines, trust your choices, trust what you believe in and feel is right.
3. Be kind to yourself
You’re going to mess it up sometimes. But that’s how we all learn and by baby number 10, we’ll all be professionals.
“Never assume people have parenthood nailed, no one does!” So true.
(Image: Instagram/@mrsphoebeburgess)4. Find a routine that works for you, your babies and your household
I chose the Johnson’s 3 Step Bath and Bed Routine and I’ve never looked back. It is now the cornerstone of our family’s day and a time when we all come together. It’s also the best way to gradually lead into quiet time and eventually bed time and has been proven to improve the quality of your baby’s sleep (and therefore your own!)
5. Ask for help
From anyone. Whenever you need it. And never allow anyone to judge your choices. Have a list of people you can call on for babysitting, wine and chats.
Gah, so cute! Poppy and Billy’s age gap is 23 months.
(Image: Instagram/@mrsphoebeburgess)6. Choose a select few peoples whose advice you heed and ignore everyone else’s
There’s only so many tips, tricks, ideas and influences you can take! And while your neighbours’ mothers’ friend might have the best intentions, it just gets confusing. So stick to your people or sources when it comes to looking for counsel.
7. And finally, soak up every vomit-stained minute of it all…
Because they genuinely do grow up so fast.
