Feeling uncomfortable in a swimsuit is feeling that even the most confident among us are familiar with.
This woman was left in tears after being asked to leave her own swimming pool because of complaints about the way her body looks in a swimsuit .
Tyler Newman’s fiancée, Tori Jenkins, was accused of wearing a “thong bathing suit” and told there were objections regarding the way she was dressed while attempting to swim in the pool at her apartment complex in the U.S.
Taking to Facebook to post about the incident, Tyler explains:
I have never really witnessed sexual harassment and/or ‘rape culture’ until today with Smoky Crossing Apartments.
The post, which has since gone viral with almost 30K shares continues to share the full outrageous story.
Today my fiancée was faced with either changing her bathing suit, covering up with shorts, or leaving the pool that we paid a $300 fee to maintain on top of a monthly rent of nearly $1000 (not including utilities and wifi).
Within three minutes of the couple arriving at the pool, they were asked to leave because of Tori’s inappropriate attire.
Tori pictured in her swimwear
Tori decided to go to the apartment office, which I regret not accompanying her on, and address the issue politely and calmly with the leasing consultant about the situation in a more private setting. In the office, the leasing consultant (who, for now, I will not name) insisted upon letting Tori take her picture to show “how inappropriate” her bathing suit was, and instructed her to look into a mirror at her own body. When my fiancée replied with “I know what I look like, I bought this myself, it’s not a thong” the consultant told Tori that if she didn’t have kids herself, she wouldn’t understand.
Tori was outraged and explained to those involved that she is aware she is curvier than most, and this means her swimsuit wouldn’t sit exactly the same as someone of a different body type.
The post from Tyler claims Tori was told that a “normal bathing suit covers your entire butt”.
She was then allegedly told that her body was “too inappropriate” for children to be around and “there are a lot of teenage boys in this complex, and you don’t need to excite them.”
Tyler’s post continued:
Today my fiancée was told that she is less important than how men feel around her. That Tori is less important than a man’s urges to be sexual towards her. I think she’s the most beautiful woman in the world, but I also respect her. I would never make her or any other woman feel less than what she’s worth because of her outfit or her looks. This is how rape culture continues to grow.
I’ve never seen my fiancée embarrassed to the point where she can’t even look her best friends in the face. I’ve never seen her cry like she did in our apartment today. Never seen her want to be isolated like that. All because some ignorant assholes think they can police the size and shape of her body. I’ve never seen a woman so disrespected.
Mind you, the Pool Rules sign states on “duly appropriate attire must be worn at all times. No cut offs.”
To drive his point home, Tyler concluded:
MY POINT: My fiancée being told she should cover up on a 90 degree day in our own apartment pool because she will “excite teenage boys” is bull. I will not stand for this. My fiancée should be able to wear a bathing suit without being sexualized and demeaned. She shouldn’t feel violated. I will make a live video of my personal opinion and reasons why this is unnecessary soon.
Tori Jenkins has since issued the following update on the situation on her own Facebook page, which addresses some FAQs around Tyler’s now viral post.
The main FAQs addressed are:
I’m a size medium. The swimsuit is a size medium. I tried on the large in the store and felt little confidence that my boobs wouldn’t show after being hit with one good splash.
The pool rules state only that “Duly appropriate attire must be worn at all times, no cut offs”
The suit may look small but that’s also after I binge cried and ate pizza. When you feel that shitty about yourself do you really think the first pose that comes to mind is happy? That I wanna have good posture and look skinny? I didn’t care. And frankly I still don’t care if I looked “too big” for the suit. Look at the body language: my shoulders are down, arms crossed, and so on. There’s only a “pinch an inch” situation on one side, because I’m slouching.
There WAS a front facing picture. I took it down after reading so many hateful comments about my stomach and so many intensely explicit sexual comments. That is the whole issue. I will not be reposting it because that isn’t the area of my body in question. I left the back view up even after the same comments are made on that picture.
The ENTIRE POINT of this post is that no man or woman has the right to make me feel uncomfortable in my own skin. No right to police me or any other human.*
The apartment complex’s spokespeople are denying any of this ever happened leaving Tori and Tyler at a loss.
What’s important to remember here is that one swimsuit is bound to fit everyone differently, and that needs to be taken into account when dress rules are being created.
