**Dear Judy,
I have lost 8kg and even though I feel much better, I don’t like my body. Everyone says I look great but I don’t feel I look as good as I expected to. I thought after all the effort it took to lose weight I’d feel fabulous but now when I flick through magazines and see pictures of gorgeous Hollywood stars, I feel disappointed and depressed.
— Disappointed**
We are an image-obsessed society and we continually make the mistake of comparing ourselves to others. Yesterday I was speaking to a professor who had just returned from a business trip to India. He commented on how Indians, unlike Westerners, are grateful for what they’ve got, while we always seem to want what we don’t have.
While it’s good to have personal goals and projects to work towards, it’s not good if the motivation behind the goals is to try to be better or have more than those around you. When you read the stories of many ‘gorgeous’ movie stars, you’ll find most of them are fighting their own personal battles and regardless of what they look like, many still battle with marital breakdowns, substance abuse, and unmet career expectations.
It’s important to recognise that being gorgeous doesn’t necessary mean you will be always be happy.
A number of years ago I worked with a journalist on a story about how she, with a team of professionals by her side, could look like a star. She had a personal trainer, fashion stylist and hairdresser and me as her food coach. After six weeks with all of us helping her, she emerged slim, buffed and gorgeous.
In her story, she talked about the personal sacrifice required to achieve the look. After six weeks on a super strict diet with early morning workouts and early nights in bed she couldn’t wait to resume a normal life, out with her friends again enjoying the occasional glass of red wine and bowl of pasta.
Congratulations — losing 8kg is a terrific accomplishment and I’m only sorry you don’t feel as proud of yourself as you should. Instead of looking at photos of stars, why don’t you look at some old pictures of yourself and compare the difference?
Think back to the days when you were 8kg heavier and the impact it had on your energy levels, skin appearance, and physical fitness. And finally, instead of looking at people who you think look better than you do, look at people less fortunate like those in India, and be grateful.
All the best,
Judy
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