If you thought TV was fake, you’re mistaken! Woman’s Day’s entertainment editor Shari Nementzik spent a night in camp and found out just how real it has been for the unlucky celebs.
Toto may bless the rain down in Africa, but I was cursing it as I sat around the campfire trying to dry my drenched clothes from the torturous downpour.
It had only been an hour or so (my watch was confiscated before I entered the jungle, so that’s my best guess) since adventuring into camp as a test subject for Ten’s new reality show I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here and I was already dreaming of my creature comforts. Bed, shelter, food, phone, I had nada! And I wasn’t happy, especially when a less than friendly tick decided to set-up home in my wet sock.
While I’m certainly not the outdoors type, I was excited for my chance to explore the camp and it’s surrounds. I even convinced myself that my Bear Grylls survival skills would kick-in and I’d be bringing home the food I’d gathered and making fires in no time. But far from showing off my bushman tactics, I was squealing into my mic like a little girl, begging to be saved from Africa’s unforgiving elements.
My heart goes out to the celebs in there because Mother Nature shows no mercy – not even to household names like TV star Maureen McCormick (best known for her role as Marcia Brady on the The Brady Bunch).
And if I learned anything from my brief time in there (I spent 8 hours in the jungle camp), it’s that the producers show none either. For those whose eyes glisten at the sight of a buffet like sporting legends Merv Hughes and Barry Hall, their stomachs are in for a shock. With so few rations, I predict plenty of feuding over food if either one were to ‘indulge’ in more than their tablespoon’s worth of beans and rice per meal.
Shari’s request for hot chips was denied, she had to deal with rations instead.
The only saviour from my grumbling stomach, itchy bites, and soggy socks was the Tok Tokkie Hut, which served as a makeshift counselling booth, as well as providing a dry haven for a few minutes.
While Lee (‘the voice’) lended me his ear and patiently listened to my moans and groans, I wasn’t impressed when he refused to grant my wish for a rack of ribs and hot chips. Instead, he had an ostrich egg zip lined into camp for the ten of us to share.
The only good thing about the lack of food is hopefully the celebs won’t have to venture to the loo, which is a hole in the ground, too often – especially in the dark. With 9 venomous snake species and a rogue leopard spotted in the area, it’s a trip I dared not make alone so I roped in a fellow campmate to stand guard.
As night fell upon us, we all started to go slightly stir crazy – a fellow journalist decided to perform an interpretive dance around the fire to pass the time, while some of us embarked on deep and meaningful conversations about aliens.
Shari settles in for the night in her sleeping bag.
Then the heavens opened yet again and just as I was ready to mouth the words, ‘I’m a journalist get me out of here,’ Lee’s soothing voice announced our imminent escape.
I can definitely say I wasn’t built for the jungle and one thing’s for sure –I’m more than happy to watch the celebrities brave it out from the comfort of my sofa – with my ribs and hot chips in hand, of course!
