I don’t know about you guys but I can’t remember a time when Seven Year Switch wasn’t on. It seems like I’ve known Sarge forever.
So it’s pretty sobering/very exciting that the show is coming to an end soon.
We’re at the penultimate episode, the one before the finale. It’s the final countdown team, get on board.
Tonight the couples are reuniting after three weeks of pillow walls and awkward dates.
First up Johnny and Tracey. They’re excited to see each other and it’s worth remembering Tracey has been with Sarge, so talking to anyone else is quite liberating.
Speaking of Sarge, over at his place the mood is more sombre. Last episode we got a sneak peek of his reunion with Stacey Louise.
He was strangely holding her and the vibe wasn’t great.
Still weird.
Stacey asks Sarge why he’s being so serious, the question on EVERYONE’S lips.
The early signs aren’t good for these two and it gets worse when Sarge brings up the bed situation. God help us when he decides to talk about the lingerie gift…
Stacey Louise then tells Sarge she hasn’t changed that much and she’s still not into action sports. Sarge makes this face.
What about abseiling?
Meanwhile, time for Mark and Kaitlyn to meet once again. They take a seat in Mark’s weird movie memorabilia apartment.
Side note, he has a lounge with built in cup holders. Of course he does.
It’s for our drinks. So they don’t spill.
They then get into the nitty gritty. Mark wants to know why Kaitlyn is such a free spirit and why can’t she be more like him – uptight, conservative and moments away from a breakdown?
Kaitlyn gets upset because Mark has a photo of him and Felicity. “Is there something between you two?” she asks Mark. Yeah there is something, it’s called begrudging politeness and ZERO chemistry.
Honestly Kaitlyn, you have nothing to worry about.
Last but not least, Felicity and Michael. Their reunion is heartfelt and loving. Felicity seals the deal by welcoming Michael back into her bed.
Now that all the reunions are done and dusted it’s time to settle back into normal life.
Obviously this will be the best bit as the couples adjust back to reality and the crushing realisation that their lives haven’t changed at all.
Tracey and Johnny have a hard hitting chat over some schnitzel.
Honestly, do I give you the schnitz?
We’re then whisked off to Sarge and Stacey Louise’s place where they’re demolishing a bottle of red and arguing. How fun.
The talk turns dark when Sarge asks brings up the whole, “Did you lie about our sex life?” thing.
Stacey Louise cracks it big time as evidenced in the excruciating body language captured below.
Sex. Something you won’t be having tonight.
She then storms off and heads upstairs. Sarge packs his bags and bails. We’re told he checks into a hotel but it really looks like more of a serviced apartment.
Just trying to keep the show honest.
Sarge ends his rant by saying “I don’t know if Stacey Louise has a soul.” So yeah, things are going well for them.
Day two for Michael and Felicity and they’re straight killing it. He’s happy, she’s happy, the kids are happy. We’ll be seeing less of them as they don’t have any #drama.
What’s that noise? It’s the sound of people switching channels. Producers quickly cut back to Sarge and Stacey Louise to deliver some more #drama.
The pair are having a phone call but Sarge goes straight into lecture mode and Stacey Louise hangs up.
“Urghhhhhhhh.”
Stacey asks to catch up in person and Sarge says he’ll go on one condition – he doesn’t want to be alone with her.
All those years in the army have left Sarge constantly concerned about an ambush.
Back to the wall, no one can get to me.
The episode ends with Sarge saying he’s realised that he does want someone more like him. So either Stacey Louise needs to change or Sarge is OUT.
That’s it folks, onto the finale where ALL the couples will decide, once and for all, if they’re going to stay together. See you then.
