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Why are we so fascinated by The Bachelorette?

It's just another silly reality TV show, right?

You could call it a guilty pleasure or make excuses about remote control-wielding partners, children or housemates. You could insist you “don’t actually watch” despite knowing who’s left and who’s going to win. Or, you could just come out with it – you not-so-secretly love The Bachelorette.

But don’t worry, you’re not alone. Australia’s inaugural season of the show, starring scorned winner of last year’s male equivalent The Bachelor, Sam Frost, has been garnering a lot of interest. On average, 969,000 viewers tune into smile or cringe their way through each and every episode.

What is it about watching 14 men vying for one woman’s attention that is so engrossing, though? Why do we keep coming back for more despite the seeming ridiculousness of the concept? Is it flipped courting rituals, the promise of a fairy-tale ending, or is it just good old fashioned escapism? Why, oh why, are we so addicted to The Bachelorette?

The reversed gender roles

Men like to be in control when it comes to dating (and vehicles with a manual gear box, but that’s another story.) This is a sweeping generalisation, granted, but any woman who has tried to take the reins of a courting situation would probably agree – dudes be all “what is happening?” when they’re not the ones calling the shots.

In The Bachelorette, the bachelors are forced to take a back seat and wait for their lady to come to them. It’s Sam who decides who she will talk to, take out on a date, and ultimately reward with a rose and another chance. It’s refreshing to see a woman have all the power.

Yes, the men can ask for her time during the cocktail parties, but this in itself is a pleasure to watch – the guys just about do their heads in debating with themselves and each other whether or not they’re going to take the plunge and steer Sam away for a moment.

It really is quality television.

All of the EMOTION

Again, this is a generalisation, but we’re more likely to experience women expressing their true emotion in real life and on our tellies. And sure, it’s true that there are producers behind the scenes forcing the bachelors to get really specific about exactly what they’re feeling towards Sam at any moment, but it seems the lads are more than happy to spill.

They wax lyrical about how amazing they think Sam is, how much they want to spend time with her, and even how difficult it is seeing her form connections with the other contestants. And, interestingly, without any control over what they’ll be doing, and perhaps in lieu of opening up too much, quite a few of the bachelors resort to gift giving to get Sam’s attention.

From songs written in her honour, to paintings drawn or vouchers made, Sam almost drowns in tokens of the boy’s affection. It’s romantic, and who doesn’t love a bit of romance!

The Bromance is strong

Speaking of romance, the guys on the show do seem to genuinely get along. This is mostly true of the women on The Bachelor, too, but it does seem there are less tension-fuelled moments between the contestants for editors to throw into the mix and overlay with dramatic music.

And while they’re all dating the same woman, and only one man can reign supreme and bask in Sam’s undying love, there’s lots of pats on backs when one man is chosen above the rest for single dates or pinned-on roses, and there’s barely any chit-chat about why any one man wouldn’t be a sensible choice for Sam.

They’re just “really good blokes.” That or exceptional actors.

We want Sam to find love

Australia was veritably OUTRAGED when Blake Garvey dumped Sam Frost after proposing to her in the finale of last year’s The Bachelor. And not only that, he promptly ran back to second runner-up Louise Pillidge straight after doing so. How very dare he?

So, it’s not surprising that we have vested interest in seeing Sam seek the ultimate revenge and be happy with someone else. After the humiliation and heartache she endured last year, we want her to win. For her, and for us – because if Sam can find true love after finding a true love rat, surely so can we.

It’s reality TV

By nature, reality television is filmed and edited in such a way that makes it incredibly addictive. It plays on our emotions with sob stories and orchestral music. We’re constantly left wondering what will happen and when we can get our next fix. So really our obsession is not even our fault.

Well played, television producers. Well played.

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