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The year that broke my heart

In her most revealing interview yet, Deborah Hutton tells Michael Sheather about her devastating family tragedy, a new romance and how, at 47, she has come to terms with never having babies.

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You could be forgiven for believing that Deborah Hutton, one of Australia’s most recognised faces, leads a perfect life, unblemished by the troubles that most of us know. She is widely considered one of the country’s most striking women, with a beauty often compared, even today, to a young Candice Bergen. At 47, her complexion is flawless, her smile dazzling. She has a beachside home, an established career and all the glamorous trappings of a contented, fortunate life.

Yet Deborah Hutton’s life is far from perfect. The truth is that she also knows pain and sadness. She and her family have endured a grief that, at times, has been almost unbearable – a double tragedy that has claimed the lives of both her beloved brothers in less than two years.

Her brother Rod, who suffered a severe brain injury in a devastating accident as a young man, died suddenly, aged 47, after an epileptic fit in July 2007.

Shattered and bewildered that she should lose Rod so unexpectedly after life had dealt him such an unfortunate hand, Deborah and her family then suffered a second, equally devastating blow – the death of her brother David, 50, a husband and father of two young boys, from liver cancer, in February this year.

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“It’s bad enough to have one brother die suddenly, but then to have the other taken just as abruptly is bewildering,” says Deborah, sitting, head bowed, at the dining table of her home in Sydney’s eastern suburbs. “There are so many mixed-up emotions: loss, sadness, grief, disbelief. I don’t know that I have come to grips with it yet and I don’t know if I ever will.”

On a sideboard in Deborah’s elegantly decorated dining room is a framed photograph of her with her brother, Rod. Downstairs, among a collection of other photos, is a portrait of Deborah enfolded in the arms of her brother, David. The affection between these three siblings is clear for all to see. They were close, though often divided by geography and circumstance. They were family who loved each other and that’s what mattered most to them.

And it’s from this affection that Deborah draws the only possible hope from a devastating situation. This and the two beautiful little boys – Jackson, four, and Joshua, one – whom David left behind. It’s in their smiles that Deborah finds a lasting affirmation of life and a signpost to the future.

To read more from our exclusive interview with Deborah Hutton, see the June issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly, out now.

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