Every morning this week we’re going to have to wake up with Dickie’s balls.
All before breakfast. What a time to be alive.
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But in all seriousness, can we just stop for a second and assess how disturbing The Today Show’s Dickie’s Double Dip segment is?
We’ve culled the list of things wrong with it to these three points:
A) The name.
B) The entire concept of pulling out balls with Dickie’s face on it.
C) THE NAME.
Every morning this week, viewers will be treated to this brilliantly named segment for the breakfast show’s ‘We Love Australia’ program.
It was first introduced in September last year by the man himself who wants to regularly promote his balls – Richard ‘Dickie’ Wilkins. This segment only comes around whenever The Today Show takes their brekkie program on the road.
His co-hosts couldn’t even hold it together when he introduced the creepy concept to them all. Check it out below.
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In case you didn’t catch Dickie’s exact words when giving his pitch to the people of Australia about the segment, here it is:
“Every day next week we’ll be inviting you to double dip in my lucky bag. And if you pick out matching balls we will hand you some cold hard cash right there,” he said to his co-hosts.
SO. MANY. EUPHEMISMS.
Even co-host Karl Stefanovic can’t deal with the creepy nature of it, posting this on his Instagram this morning.
Classic Karl
The premise of the game – if you pull out two Dickie’s (two balls with Dickie’s face on it), you get $200 cash.
And who is he targeting to dip their hand into a bucket and pull out said balls?
Kids.
The country’s new tourism tag should be: “Australia, the land where a 61-year-old man with giant hair wants you to pull out his balls for money.”
All we can say is, thank God this week is over. We don’t think we could have handled any more of Dickie’s balls.
Round of applause goes to you if you can watch this video of Wednesday’s segment without doing an involuntary shudder.