“I forgive you for not always being there when I needed you and for not being the dad I expected,” Lily Collins wrote in 2017 in an emotional open letter to her famous but often-absent father, musician Phil Collins, as part of her book of personal essays, Unfiltered: No Shame, No Regrets, Just Me.
“I forgive the mistakes you made. Although it may seem like it’s too late, it’s not. There’s still so much time to move forward.”
And in the years since she bravely addressed the issues with her dad, insiders say Lily, 35, and Phil, 73, have been working hard to repair their fractured relationship.
The Emily In Paris star struggled with being estranged from her father after he left their UK home and moved to Switzerland after her parents divorced when she was just five years old.
And while they’re in a happy place now, Lily is fearful they might not have much time left together as the drummer’s health continues to deteriorate.
HEALTH NIGHTMARE
The British popstar has been suffering from a spinal injury since 2007, when he dislocated vertebrae in his back. Despite surgeries in 2009 and 2016, he was left with more nerve damage, which caused him to give up drumming after 50 years. Tragically, he is now even more immobile and is often wheelchair-bound.
“Lily’s always the one to brighten up the room, but right now all she can think about is her dad. His situation is not one that improves, which is why she’s finding it frustrating being in another country right now,” says the insider.
“The one good thing is Paris isn’t that far away from the UK (where Phil lives), but she’s on edge about his deteriorating situation and simply wants to spend every moment she can with him,” adds the source. “She’s been having sleepless nights about not being there for him. She knows he may not be around for much longer so it’s been hard filming her show.”
CLOSER THAN EVER
Since famously patching things up, Lily and Phil are incredibly close, with the actress, who was brought up by her mother Jill Tavelman, sharing a dedication to him on Father’s Day in June.
“Happy Father’s Day, Dad. I’m sending more hugs to you than ever and I’m beyond grateful for you today and every day. My words won’t be able to do it justice but… you know. I love you to the moon and back again,” she wrote.
The source adds, “It took some time for Phil to realise her creativity is also part of his and to not be threatened by it. He’s become a key part of her success and has coached her through some difficult decisions since he’s been back in her life.”
Lily’s not the type to have any regrets but she’s always felt a need to make up for lost time. “She’s so proud of him and what he’s achieved. It’s breaking her heart to see her rock-star dad so frail and struggling.
“She wants to cherish every moment she has with him and enjoy this time together when he’s no longer performing. She and [her husband] Charlie [McDowell] want to start a family next year and knowing there’s a chance her dad will be still around is everything to her.
“She wants him to teach her kids to drum and sing, and be there to tell them stories of his life as a popstar. She hopes he’ll be around for a long time to come.”
