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Honour your other half

If you’re in a relationship, it can be sobering to take an inventory of how you treat them.

How much time did you spend together this week?

How much (if any) was “quality time”? What did you talk about – chit-chat, family business, or something more significant?

Give your partner the same consideration you would a friend, or even a stranger. Don’t forget to say thank you – every single time – and try to speak calmly, even when you’re furious!

Try at least one of these today:

  • Read to each other from your favourite books

  • Sing silly love songs to each other

  • Start a hobby together

  • Give your loved one a massage

  • Raise a pet together. Couple with pets are happier and healthier than petless ones

  • Send him a letter, even if you live together. Everyone loves to get a little fan mail!

  • Drink champagne

  • Go parking!

  • Get intimate: Buy each other gorgeous – or ridiculous – underwear and leave it on the bed, with a rose

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Q&a: Di Morrissey

Q & A with Di Morrissey, author of Barra Creek (Pan Macmillan Australia), the Great Read in the November issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly.

**Q. You have said that each book comes as a strange gift and that you wait for whatever fateful circumstances bring each novel to you – what were they in the case of Barra Creek?

A.** Well, I was planning a totally different book. I was just waiting to see which one stepped forward, and an old friend whom I felt I knew everything about, made a passing reference at a dinner party one night to working as a governess in the Northern Territory. And it hit a nerve and I thought wouldn’t that be fabulous? But I decided I wanted to go to the Gulf.

**Q. Why?

A.** I’d already set two books in the Northern Territory and I love fishing, and my partner, Boris and I had talked about going to catch barramundi, and I kept looking at Queensland thinking how fascinating it was…you know crocodiles and all that stuff and I thought it would be an interesting and dangerous environment, and that it might be fun to hook it on the governess. But the whole thing bears no resemblance in any way to my friend’s life.

What we did was we drove up the Gulf and based ourselves in Normanton and went to Karumba. In Normanton, I met a lot of governesses who had worked up there. They go up to work and hook a good bush guy, and stay there. And so again, I thought well, what’s in Normanton – so I rang and I finally got onto the Normanton library and the young girl who worked at the library, her family were the Gallaghers and they have big properties up there. She knew my books and was only too pleased to introduce me to her family, and they took me everywhere and were able to introduce me to all kinds of people to hear all kinds of stories. So I was able to hook into the right people at the right time.

**Q. How long did you spend in the Gulf country, researching your book?

A.** About a month. We drove and took Bunya, our Sydney silkie. We went inland into the river a little bit, [Karumba is on the coast], and that’s where all the banana prawns come from. When I lobbed there some bloke on a fishing trawler recognised me and said, ‘You’re that lady writer…geez, are you going to set a book up here and do for prawns what you did for pearls?’

**Q. (turning the tables, Di asks me) What did you think of the grisly death in Barra Creek?

A.** Fantastic, what a shocking way to go.

**Q. (me again). Where is Normanton?

A.** On the Gulf of Carpentaria, the pointy bit of Cape York, on the left hand side at the bottom, that’s where Karumba is and then 1km inland on the river is Normanton. So it’s on the Gulf of Carpentaria, on the western side of Cape York.

**Q. Tell me about the worst and the best of being up there?

A.** The best was the extraordinary landscape and the fabulous people. You meet people who live in extreme conditions – many are either totally mad, or eccentric, or absolutely wonderful. But even the eccentric ones are wonderful in their own way.

**Q. The worst?

A.** I was fearful of crocodiles. The biggest crocodile ever shot in Australia by a woman was in 1967 and it was 28 feet long, and it’s in the main street of Normanton. So the crocs were around, so walking around the water’s edge, and going out in a boat, it was a creepy feeling knowing that the red eyes are out there, looking at you. And at one point we were driving and were at a claypan in the middle of nowhere when we let Bunya out of the car for a run. All of a sudden we had whumph, whumph, whumph and a wedge tail eagle with a wing span of 10 feet circles overhead and we had to run and run to catch the dog in case it picked her up.

We met some amazing people along the way. We met this old guy who was in his 80s. He no longer walks around Australia, and he lives in a lean-to at the back of a pub. He had a little dog he was devoted to and he was nearly blind. I struck up a conversation with him because of his little dog. We had a steak meal and neither of us could finish it, so we decided to take it and give it to his dog. We finished up spending the bulk of the day in this lean-to with him telling us stories about his life.

Meeting people like that makes travelling so special. And Boris is making a documentary. He has filmed me for the last 12 months, from the day I started the book to the day I finished it. He filmed everything that happened, like the day I was sobbing because I’d erased half a chapter. On a book tour. Everything. So it will be very interesting to see what we end up with.

**Q. Are you doing anything with the documentary?

A.** We’re hoping to put it up to someone. The other idea that we’re also looking at is Di Morrissey’s Australia, because most of my books have been set in all different places around Australia. I could go back to those places and look at the landscape, and the people who inspired my books. It would be a novelist’s travelogue and I think it would be quite interesting.

When I did This Is Your Life I felt very comfortable being back in front of a camera. And I thought I wouldn’t mind doing something again, although I wouldn’t want it to be full-time. We’ll see.

**Q. Barra Creek is your 13th book?

A.** No, this is my 12th adult novel and I’m now embarking on my 13th, set in the Great Barrier Reef.

**Q. One aspect of the plot of Barra Creek that I think many people will relate to is the poisonous family relationships.

A.** Yes, I think everybody has a family story where there’s some conflict.

**Q. But it doesn’t always involve murder.

A.** No (laughing), sometimes it’s a slow death and involves more suffering.

**Q. Yes, in some cases you might be better off being eaten by a crocodile?

A.** Yes (laughing). I should tell you, too, that I had a crocodile hunter who helped me a lot. So all the croc stuff in Barra Creek is true and accurate.

**Q. I thought all your mustering detail was very good, too – do you ride?

A.** I do. But of course for my first book I went and worked on a station as a ringer. I do like to go back to the bush. It was hard to simplify without changing it or making it incorrect.

**Q. You captured the 1960s very well, were you a teenager back then?

A.** Oh, absolutely and Ita Buttrose was very helpful, in terms of the places in Sydney that were very popular then. And I made the governess a New Zealander so that she came from an ultra, super- conservative society and went from a cool, green, snowy landscape to the heat and dust of the Gulf country. I wanted it to be that kind of contrast.

I talked to a lot of the old Aboriginal and white stockmen at the retirement home in Normanton. People in their 80s and 90s. But they had fantastic memories. Some of the staff said, ‘Oh, they have nothing to say.’ But you sit down and get them talking and reminiscing – some of the nursing staff were very surprised to hear them chatting away.

**Q. Sounds like you had a fabulous adventure up there?

A.** Yes, it was.

**Q. When you’re writing one of your books, how many words a day do you aim to do?

A.** Whatever comes during the course of the day, but I have a good working day. But it’s also a good test of the book when I can’t wait to get back to it. If I get up in the morning and can’t wait to get to it, it’s a good sign that the book has got me in and I want to find out what’s going to happen. But I am pretty productive.

**Q. Do you re-draft as you go?

A.** No, I write it all the way straight through, as I don’t like to stop that journey. I wait till I finish and then I go back. All up, I probably do about four drafts.

**Q. The room you write in?

A.** I go between my little writing cabin which Boris built me and the office at home. I do the creative stuff in the cabin. Then when I’m writing stuff that requires me to make phone calls or check stuff, I do it in the office. The cabin’s a little wooden shingle cottage built in the garden at home.

**Q. There’s no phone or anything there?

A.** No, there’s power so I can plug in my laptop, and I just hear running water and see greenery. But in my mind I was in the Gulf. So much so that at one point I stepped outside the cabin, heard a rustle and it was, ‘Oh God – crocs! No, no, it’s alright, I’m in my garden.’

**Q. I have read that the actor Chips Rafferty was your mentor and unofficial godfather and that the famous poet, Dorothea McKellar, was a mentor, and of the family tragedy when your father and brother died?

A.** It’s been mentioned in articles and stuff but not dwelt upon.

**Q. Was it an accident?

A.** My father ran a water taxi service at Pittwater, north of Sydney. I think my brother, Michael, was about 14 months old. Apparently there was no-one on the boat and Michael fell overboard. My father jumped in after him and they both drowned. My father had heavy clothes on and boots which weighed him down. I think of that and when I look at my mother I wonder, how would I cope?

**Q. How old were you then?

A.** Ten.

**Q. Your mother must have been enormously strong to go on and pick up the pieces after that?

A.** Yes, because she was just a housewife and we had nothing – we were left penniless.

**Q. You went to live in LA for a period of time after that?

A.** Yes. Mum’s sister was living there and we went to be with her. We stayed there for a year and then eventually, my mother carved out this career as a TV director.

**Q. Your mother must have been an inspiration for you?

A.** Yes, very much. There is nothing I feel I can’t do, given the opportunity.

**Q. You are divorced, with two children. Tell me what they are doing now?

A.** Dr Gabrielle runs the sexology unit at Curtin University, Perth and is a writer and broadcaster. She is 32.

Nick, is an art historian completing his PhD at UCLA in Buddhist studies. He will be 30 in November.

**Q. What is your star sign?

A.** Pisces. I’m a water sign, romantic and creative, but with a Leo moon or something that gives me an enormous work ethic. I’m never late for my deadline and I’m business minded.

**Q. Your favourite colour?

A.** Emerald.

**Q. What do you hope for?

A.** That the refugee problem and lack of leadership being shown in this country is resolved very soon.

**Q. I’ve read that you once glimpsed yourself as an old lady saying you could have written books?

A.** Yes, that was something that drove me, to take the plunge, to have a bash at writing a book at what was probably the worst time of my life. But I felt if I didn’t try then, I’d never know if I could do it or not. And I’d talked about writing books since I was seven.

So I jumped off the cliff and found I could fly.

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Decoupage placemats

These elegant placemats are the ideal addition to any dinner table. Create them for yourself or give them as a house-warming or Christmas gift.

Materials

Craftwood placemats (available from major craft outlets)

Jo Sonja’s Basecoat – Primrose

Black and White photocopies of floral designs from botanical prints or wrapping papers (or choose your own theme)

Jo Sonja’s Artist’s Acrylics: Pine Green, Yellow Oxide, Warm White and Burnt Umber

Jo Sonja’s All Purpose Sealer

Jo Sonja’s Satin Water-Based Varnish

Brushes: No 12 flat, No 2 round

Manicure or decoupage scissors

Craft knife and cutting mat

PVA glue

Roller/brayer

Chux cloth

Permanent black marking pens: fine point and thick point

Ruler

Sandpaper: fine grade and 120 Wet & Dry

Winsor & Newton Japan Gold Size

Liquid Gum Arabic

Jo Sonja’s Archival Oil: Burnt Umber

Mineral turpentine

Feast Watson Gloss and Satin Oil-based Varnish

Adhesive contact felt or suede (for the back of each mat)

Method

Mix Primrose basecoat and All-purpose Sealer 1:1 and paint placemats with three coats, using the No 12 flat brush, sanding lightly after the second coat. Allow the paint to dry overnight, then apply one coat of sealer.

Make the desired number of photocopies for your placemats. Tint your photocopies with colour wash as follows: paint leaves with diluted Pine Green, adding more intense colour on the shaded areas of the leaves. The stems are painted with Burnt Umber. Paint any flowers with Warm White mixed with a little Yellow Oxide. When the photocopies are thoroughly dry, seal the back and front of each with a coat of Sealer. Cut out the pictures using decoupage scissors and use the craft knife to cut out any enclosed areas.

Using a soft brush, apply slightly diluted PVA glue to the back of one picture and position the image on the placemat and smooth it over with the roller to remove any air bubbles. Finish by wiping the surface with a damp Chux cloth to remove excess surface glue. Repeat to attach all your pictures to the placemats and allow to dry overnight. Measure 0.5cm in from the edge of each placemat and rule a border line using the fine black marking pen. Use the thick pen to colour the edges of the mats.

Seal the entire surface of each mat with two coats of satin water-based varnish, and allow to dry thoroughly.

Paint the front of each mat with a coat of Japan Gold Size and allow to dry until it is just tacky (this will take anywhere between one and three hours, depending on weather conditions). Next, apply a layer of liquid gum arabic over the size. Allow to dry. After 30-60 minutes, cracks will begin to appear on the surface and the drying process can be speeded up by using a hairdryer set on low held about 10cm from the surface of the mat. Repeat for all the mats and allow to dry overnight.

To accentuate the cracks, rub a little Burnt Umber oil paint into the surface using a dry cloth, rubbing it in a circular motion. Use a clean cloth to wipe off the excess paint, and allow to dry overnight. Finish your mats with four coats of gloss oil-based varnish and for a satin finish, another two to three coats of satin oil-based varnish, with a light sand using 120 Wet & Dry sandpaper before the final coat. Apply contact felt or suede to the back of each mat for a protective finish.

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Breakfast for breast cancer

We invite you to attend the National Breast Cancer Centre's Pink Ribbon Breakfast.
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Breast cancer breakthrough

A variety of studies have shown a connection between low levels of vitamin A and lung cancer. Now new research published in the Journal of the National Cancer Institute indicates the same may be true for breast cancer. The researchers found that women with breast cancer were less likely to have a particular protein called CRBP, which facilitates the proper digestion and use of vitamin A.

A variety of studies have shown a connection between low levels of vitamin A and lung cancer. Now new research published in the Journal of the National Cancer Institute indicates the same may be true for breast cancer. The researchers found that women with breast cancer were less likely to have a particular protein called CRBP, which facilitates the proper digestion and use of vitamin A.

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Food intolerance

There is only one accurate way to diagnose food intolerance and that is to follow an elimination diet.

Uninformed practitioners sometimes suggest the methods described below. However, these are a complete waste of time and money, yielding inaccurate and misleading. They are listed here only by way of warning.

Live blood tests

A small sample of blood is taken, sometimes from a pinprick in the finger. The patient may be invited to look through a microscope, and be shown what is said to be his or her white blood cells “attacking” a foreign substance, supposedly indicating intolerance to whatever that substance is.

This method is also claimed to diagnose systemic candida. It is absolutely unreliable.

Hair samples

A small hair sample is analysed, allegedly to identify food responsible for symptoms. This test also has no scientific basis whatsoever.

Skin prick testing

Tiny amounts of proteins extracted from certain foods are injected into the skin. If redness develops at the injection site, it’s said to indicate food intolerance.

While skin tests can sometimes be very useful for discovering the cause of allergic reactions, this is not the case for food intolerances.

No doubt there are other way-out methods of diagnosing food intolerance that will be offered to the unwary.

As said, the only reliable method is an elimination diet.

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Vitamins at the beach

Swallowing a vitamin tablet won’t mean you can skip the hat and sunscreen when you go to the beach, but it may give you extra protection from the sun’s rays.

A study published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition has found that subjects taking 25 mg of natural mixed carotenoids plus 500 IU of vitamin E had less skin reddening after UV exposure.

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Slow down and simplify

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Our favourite books

To celebrate our 70th birthday, we asked a few members of the team at The Australian Women’s Weekly to nominate their favourite five books of all time.

Here they are:

Deborah Thomas, Editor

Into Thin Air, by Jon Krakauer

Wild Swans, by Jung Chang

The Lovely Bones, by Alice Sebold

The Wilder Shores of Love, by Lesley Blanch

The Magic Faraway trilogy, by Enid Blyton

Lyndey Milan, Food Director

Like Water For Chocolate, by Laura Esquivel

Shipping News, by Annie Proulx

Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood, by Rebecca Wells

Angela’s Ashes, by Frank McCourt

Charlotte’s Web, by E.B. White

Athena Starwoman, author of Zodiac Lovers (HarperCollins)

Seabiscuit, by Laura Hillyard

It’s Not About the Bike, by Lance Armstrong

The Thorn Birds, by Colleen McCullough

Lord of the Rings, by Tolkien, entire series

Gone With The Wind, by Margaret Mitchell

Caroline Roessler, Managing Editor

To Kill A Mockingbird, by Harper Lee

The Catcher In The Rye, by JD Salinger

Birdsong, by Sebastian Faulks

The Secret History, by Donna Tartt

In Cold Blood, by Truman Capote

Gabrielle Ranaldi, Website Editor

The Magus, by John Fowles

Catch 22, by Joseph Heller

Intimacy, by Hanif Kureshi

Oscar and Lucinda, by Peter Carey

A Prayer For Owen Meany, by John Irving

Carol George, Books Editor

A Passage To India, by EM Forster

Aunt Julia and the Scriptwriter, by Mario Vargas Llosa

The Dice Man, by Luke Rhinehart

The Great Gatsby, by F Scott Fitzgerald

The French Lieutenant’s Woman, by John Fowles

Rosemary Bruce, Chief Sub-Editor

The Complete Adventures of Snugglepot and Cuddlepie, by May Gibbs

The Gormenghast Trilogy, by Mervyn Peake

Libra, by Don DeLillo

Pity the Nation, by Robert Fisk

Lovely Bones, by Alice Sebold

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Book gossip: October 2003

The prolific, talented Jackie French has won Book of the Year for her gorgeous children’s book, Diary of a Wombat, published by HarperCollins. Jackie, who is the gardening writer for The Australian Women’s Weekly, won against some impressive titles, including Recollection of a Bleeding Heart, Across The Nightingale Floor, Holy Cow and Almost French. The award is voted for annually by the Australian Booksellers’ Association, who nominate the Australian book they most enjoyed selling and working with in their bookshops.

In the “I don’t know how she does it” category: Colleen McCullough, whose next book, The Touch (Century), marks a return to the romance genre for the Thornbird author, still types her books on a manual typewriter! For every one of her Roman books, she wrote a million words and then edited it back to 280,000 – all done manually!

One of the UK’s best known female war correspondents, Kate Adie, is touring Australia at the end of February. Kate, whose terrific autobiography, The Kindness of Strangers, was released earlier this year, is visiting to promote her latest, Corsets to Camouflage, which looks at the image of uniformed women in conflict and civilian roles throughout the 20th century. Kate will attend the Perth Writers’ Festival from February 18-21 and will be in Melbourne February 23-24, in Sydney February 25-27 and Canberra on February 26.

Madonna is in talks to play the gypsy in the movie version of Paulo Coelho’s The Alchemist.

Caroline Carver, winner of the Crime Writers’ Association Debut Dagger Award for Blood Junction, is touring in November to promote her latest crime thriller, Dead Heat (Orion). The UK writer, who once lived here for 10 years, is a mad rally car driver and blames her spirit of adventure on her parents – her father was a jet fighter pilot and her mother set the land speed record in Australia.

The movie version of Charles Frazier’s Cold Mountain, starring Nicole Kidman, Jude Law and Renee Zellweger, is scheduled to open here late December.

Ali Bashir, Saddam Hussein’s personal physician for 10 years, is writing an account of his experiences in Saddam’s inner circle, according to Publishers Weekly.

A memoir by Deborah Santana, wife of Carlos Santana has been bought in the US.

The authors of the TV hit about to screen here, Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, have made a book deal for a companion volume.

Oprah favourite House of Sand and Fog has been turned into a movie starring Ben Kingsley and Jennifer Connelly.

Over 50, local, national and international authors will converge on the apple isle October 2-5, when The Australian School Library Association and The Children’s Book Council of Australia hold their national conference in Hobart.

Gabriel Garcia Marquez has written his autobiography, Living to Tell the Tale, and Muhammad Ali tells his own story in The Soul of a Butterfly. According to press reports, the boom in sales of television cookbooks may be over in the UK. Nigella Lawson’s and Jamie Oliver’s most recent books did not match the success of previous ones. Publicity for Shirley MacLaine’s new book, Out On A Leash, has been held up as the actress has hurt her back. No-one’s saying how.

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