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I faked my heritage to score my dream job!

A few years ago while searching for a new job I was very excited to stumble across an advertisement for a nightclub manager position. The club was a popular nightspot in my local area and, at that age, I thought it was be a fantastic opportunity — not to mention loads of fun!

Upon examining the advertisement closely, though, I noticed at the fine print at the bottom read: “Must speak Italian”.

My knowledge of the Italian language was limited having only taken a short course in it at high school. But even though I could hardly string a sentence together in Italian, I couldn’t refuse such an exciting offer. In the ignorance of youth, I convinced myself that I could “wing it” and I went ahead and applied. To my amazement I got the job.

When I arrived for my first shift the owner greeted me with a double kiss and a hearty “Buongiorno!” Even though I was panicking inside, I forced a smile as I fumbled through his questions like where my family hailed from. “Umm… Sicily,” I answered unsteadily before he launched in to an animated story (in Italian of course) about what I can only assume was my homeland. I quietly excused myself and headed to the bar.

Thankfully, the majority of the bar staff were young second-generation kids who preferred to converse in English. I found it easy enough managing the bar as I had previous experience, but the most difficult part of the job was concealing the fact that I wasn’t Italian!

I figured in the first two weeks, if I avoided the owners and kept my head down, my colleagues would assume that I was shy which would give me some time to grasp a new language.

I bought Italian books and tapes and carried them with me everywhere so when I had a free moment I could brush up. My Italian/English dictionary became my bible and I religiously wrote down all the phrases I had heard during the day so I could look them up when I finished for the night. I even rented Italian movies on my days off!

I had also developed a few techniques to mask my embarrassing lack of knowledge. When I had to speak to the owner on the phone I would pretend that my line was bad which prompted him to speak very clearly and slowly. I worked out when he would be visiting the club and I avoided him like the plague! When I had a message to give him, I passed it on to his bookkeeper who would write it down for him in Italian. As for the bar staff who preferred to speak their native tongue, I gave them shifts on the days I had off.

If a customer asked me a question I couldn’t immediately decipher, I blamed the booming music and asked them to repeat themselves louder. Even if I had no idea what someone was talking about, I found simply nodding in acknowledgment saved me on many occasions!

After a few months, I became quite good at speaking Italian — although in no way was I fluent. Eventually the long hours, the late nights and all the pretending had stressed me out. I felt it was only a matter of time before I was exposed as a fake, so I decided to quit while I was ahead.

In all, it was a good experience — I made some great friends and found a love of Italian culture. I have plans to visit Italy in June and I can’t wait to see what “my homeland” is really like!

Picture posed by model.

Your say: Have your say about this true confession below…

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Sean Penn sparks controversy at the Oscars

Well-known for being vocal about his political views, Sean Penn didn’t fail to spark controversy when he won the Best Actor award last night at the Oscars.

It was the second Oscar win of his career, courtesy of his portrayal of gay civil rights activist Harvey Milk in Gus Van Sant‘s Milk.

In his acceptance speech, Sean noticeably did not thank his wife, Robin Wright Penn. Instead, he chose to comment about the state of gay civil rights and the anti-gay religious protesters, who are a common sight each year at the Oscars.

In his speech, Penn said: “For those who saw the signs of hatred as our cars drove in tonight… I think that it is a good time for those who voted for the ban against gay marriage to sit and reflect and anticipate their great shame and the shame in their grandchildren’s eyes if they continue that way of support. We’ve got to have equal rights for everyone.”

The celebrity-packed audience responded with rousing applause.

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Be happy without being perfect

Be happy without being perfect
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Reese Witherspoon’s baby bump shock

The actress fuels baby talk as she sports an increasingly rounded belly on a visit to Venice Beach with Jake.

Reese Witherspoon continues to be at the centre of pregnancy rumours, with the usually svelte actress stepping out in LA in recent weeks with what looks suspiciously like a baby bump.

Reese, 32, first sparked pregnancy speculation in December when she visited a medical centre with nine-year-old daughter Ava.

But in the weeks since then, her rounded tum appears to have grown significantly larger — inflaming speculation that she is expecting her first child with boyfriend Jake Gyllenhaal.

Reese has noticeably swapped her usual figure-hugging wardrobe for baggier clothing and extra-large handbags in recent weeks, and appears to have relaxed her usually strict workout regime.

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Jen and John’s Valentine’s vacation

The couple celebrate their “on” status with a romantic holiday in the Bahamas.

Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer have confirmed that they remain one of Hollywood’s hottest couples, slipping away for a steamy weekend in the Bahamas.

As our pictures show, the weekend — which John planned as a surprise Valentine’s and 40th birthday gift for Jen — was more than enough to put him back into her good books after their brief split earlier this year.

The He’s Just Not That Into You star couldn’t get enough of her musician beau as they said their goodbyes following a weekend holed up in a beachfront mansion on the island of Eleuthera.

As they waited to board their private jets, onlookers noticed Jen appeared clingy, going in for a kiss with her arms wrapped around John’s neck as his remained by his side. In contrast, John appeared nonchalant as he walked away from his girlfriend.

“Jen looked really upset to be leaving John,” an onlooker told X17online. “John leaned in to kiss her but — should I say it? — he seemed to be ‘not that into her!’…”

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Pool tragedy mum: ‘I’ll never forget my twins’

By Angela Mollard

Pictures: Andrew Jacob

She suffered every mother’s worst nightmare when her twin sons died in the backyard pool, but Maxine is fighting through her grief.

It’s the quietness that Maxine Hill notices most. Where once there was the sound of two little boys riding their bikes and giggling as they smeared Vegemite on each other’s faces, now there is only silence.

Three months after her twin sons Ethan and Matthew drowned in the family swimming pool, the young mum and her family are slowly trying to piece their lives back together.

“The worst thing is knowing that you’re never going to kiss or hug them again,” says 22-year-old Maxine, drawing her arms around herself as she reveals for the first time the full horror of her twins’ deaths.

Sitting on the enclosed patio overlooking the large pool, you can understand why Maxine and her family have to move from their home on NSW’s Central Coast.

“I can’t look at the pool — all I see are the boys lying still beside it with the police and ambulance all around… That image never goes away,” says Maxine, as she turns slowly through a pair of baby memory books that are full of loving detail but end abruptly.

For the full story, see this week’s Woman’s Day (on sale February 23).

To donate money to NETS go to www.everydayhero.com.au/ethan_and_matthew_foundation

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Kim Ledger tells: Heath’s final gift to Matilda

The late actor’s father opens up about his son’s amazing legacy to his beloved daughter.

He’s already won every prestigious acting accolade in the Hollywood awards season so far. And with Heath Ledger looking almost certain to take out a posthumous Oscar at the time of going to press, his three-year-old daughter Matilda has all the more reason to be proud of her late dad’s legacy.

Speaking exclusively to Woman’s Day on the eve of the Oscars, Heath’s father Kim Ledger has confirmed that should Heath win the Oscar, the award will be Matilda’s to cherish.

“Of course it would be Matilda’s award and we’d keep it in trust for her, along with everything else,” the Perth businessman told us.

Dismissing talk that the three-year-old could also be brought to the stage should Heath win, Kim says the well protected toddler will probably be home asleep in bed on the big night.

Regardless of the outcome, Heath’s ultimate wish for his daughter — financial security and a loving, extended family united in her best interests — looks set to be fulfilled.

It has come as a relief that the actor’s US life insurance company has finally accepted that Heath’s death was accidental. With a policy claim worth millions, Matilda’s future is assured.

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Katie Underwood exclusive: ‘My drug hell’

**By Patrice Fidgeon

The former Bardot singer breaks her silence on her secret stint in rehab for marijuana addiction.**

She became famous as the outspoken, sassy member of girl group Bardot, but six months ago Katie Underwood was a shadow of her former self.

After her marriage split, Katie — a self-confessed “recreational” marijuana user — developed a full-blown habit, smoking the drug to dull her pain and retreat from the world.

Shutting herself off from her family and friends, she’d stay home every night and smoke joints until she fell into a dreamless sleep. She lost all motivation and stopped writing music. Even the thought of socialising filled her with anxiety.

“I know, unquestionably, that pot [caused my anxiety] and it was one of those light bulb moments when I realised just how it had impacted on my life,” Katie reveals to Woman’s Day.

But it would take several more months before Katie, 33, finally faced her demons — and checked into rehab.

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Andre Rieu: ‘My song to save the bush’

**By Lucy Chesterton

The virtuoso is using his music to ease the sorrow of our bushfire victims.**

Dutch music master André Rieu is helping Australians rebuild their shattered lives in the wake of Black Saturday by donating all proceeds from his new song Yours Forever to the Red Cross Victorian Bushfire Fund.

“When you are on the other side of the world and you see people suffering in Australia, a country you love, it gives you the feeling that you cannot do anything to help,” André tells Woman’s Day.

“When I learned of the bushfires in Australia, I wanted to jump in a plane and come to your side and fight.

“But all I can do is make music, and so I hope that the music I give you now will help the people who are suffering.”

Like so many others around the world, André was overcome with emotion at the thought of the tragic deaths that have devastated Australian families over the past two weeks.

Never before had stories of heartbreak and heroism moved the musician so deeply as when the first reports of Black Saturday emerged in his homeland of Holland.

And in the great Aussie tradition of helping your mates when the chips are down, the big-hearted star was moved to write a song in support of the bushfire victims who are now struggling to rebuild their lives in the land he considers his “second home”.

“This is the first time I have ever donated my music to a relief fund like this,” he says.

“I hope people will follow my example and do whatever they are able to do to help.

“If something happens to me, or you, I am sure we would like to be helped also.”

All proceeds from André’s “uplifting” instrumental track will be donated to the Red Cross, which will also provide support to victims of the recent Queensland floods.

Given André’s enormous popularity in Australia, it’s hoped his generous decision to donate all proceeds from Yours Forever will mean relief for large numbers of Aussie families.

But donations aside, André is a believer in the healing powers of music itself, having relied on songs to help him through times of trouble.

“I myself took a lot of comfort from music when I was sad or when something went wrong,” André says.

Happily married for more than 30 years to Marjorie, and devoted to his two sons, André also knows the importance of family and can understand the devastation of losing a loved one.

“My heart goes out to you all,” he says. “All of my feelings are with you who are suffering, all of my thoughts are with you, and all of my heart is with you.

“Have all of the courage you can.”

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Good for your gut

Good for your gut

Give the Mylanta a miss. When tummy troubles strike, try these natural stomach soothers to relieve unwelcome gurgles, hiccups and burps.

Get herbal help

  • Ginger has antispasmodic properties and is excellent for settling stomach upsets and easing nausea. Take it in capsule form; or, nibble candied ginger.

  • A cup of chamomile tea will relieve indigestion and wind because it acts as a carminative, meaning it releases gas from the gut.

  • Peppermint oil soothes intestinal cramps and relieves bloating. It is best taken as slow-release capsules like Mintec, available at www.epharmacy.com.au.

  • Chew fennel seeds. They contain oils that soothe stomach spasms and control flatulence. That’s why Indian restaurants set out dishes of them for customers.

Seek a supplement

  • Constant bloating may signal an imbalance in gut microflora, which can be improved by taking a probiotic supplement containing live cultures of Lactobacilli bacteria: acidophilus and bifidus. Read labels carefully. To have a therapeutic effect, a probiotic supplement should contain at least 1 billion live organisms per dose. Foods that encourage ‘friendly’ bacteria in the gastrointestinal tract include milk products (e.g. yoghurt and whey powder) and fermented foods (miso, kimchi and sauerkraut). Some experts recommend ‘feeding’ these beneficial bugs with complex carbohydrates known as prebiotics. Barley, beans, dandelion greens and chicory are good sources, but any whole grains and high-fibre foods will do.

  • Artichoke-leaf extract contains fructo-oligosaccharides (FOS) which stimulate bile production, and so improve digestion. It is available in tablet and capsule form in healthfood stores, or from www.thexton.com.au.

  • Licorice root has been used since ancient times to treat indigestion and modern research confirms its benefits. A particular form known as DGL (deglycyrrhizinated licorice) is excellent for soothing stomach upsets by coating the lining of the oesophagus and stomach. It is most effective when taken as a chewable wafer, as it works best when mixed with saliva.

  • A homoeopathic remedy can be closely matched to your symptoms: for example, Nux vomica for a recurring sour taste, nausea and burping; Arsenicum album for thirstiness and heartburn; Ipecacuanha for excess saliva and hiccups. To find a homoeopath near you, visit www.homeopathyoz.org.

Try a little ‘nanna know-how’

  • Indigestion can result from too little stomach acid as well as too much. An old tried-and-true solution is to drink a teaspoon of apple cider vinegar stirred into a glass of water, especially after a rich meal. Add a little honey if you wish.

  • Stir a teaspoon of bicarbonate of soda (bicarb) into a glass of water and drink it. This neutralises stomach acid and relieves wind.

  • Practise prevention: Eat little, slowly and often to minimise stomach acid production; avoid fatty foods, coffee, and alcohol; and eat your last meal of the day at least three hours before bedtime. Be wary of fruit juice and dairy products – fruit juice contains fructose, which can cause wind; an inability to digest lactose, a sugar found in milk, could make you feel gassy.

** Note If you take cyclosporine (a drug for rheumatoid arthritis), check with your doctor before taking peppermint oil. Peppermint can reduce milk flow, so use with caution if breast-feeding. Don’t take pure licorice – as opposed to the DGL form described here – if you have high blood pressure, as it can elevate blood pressure. Avoid ginger if you suffer from gastric ulcers, and fennel if you’re an epileptic. Do not take bicarb if you have high blood pressure and/or are on a low-sodium diet as it is high in sodium.*

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