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A father’s anguish: my wife killed our baby

Devastated Perth dad Chris Nicholls tells Natalee Furhmann about the day his perfect life was shattered.

When new mum Rebecca Morley told her husband Chris to go back to sleep after they both woke to their baby Freddy’s early morning cry, Chris happily agreed. Four hours later, Rebecca told him she had killed their son.

“I still love her, but I’ll never understand why she did what she did,” says heartbroken Chris Nicholls of his depressed wife. “We had a lovely romance and a lovely life ? it was four years of pure happiness for me, and at no stage were there signs of what was to come. As a father, you don’t expect your wife to kill your child.”

What was to come was nothing short of a nightmare for Chris, 44, who fell in love with their much-yearned-for IVF baby when he first set eyes on him on May 11, 2008.

Just four weeks later, the doting dad’s life was destroyed when Rebecca, now 40, woke Chris and calmly told him that she’d smothered their son.

His school teacher wife recently escaped a jail term after pleading guilty to infanticide, or killing a newborn, in a Perth court. She was placed under a two-year supervision order.

“When someone you love kills someone you love, it’s a cruel paradox,” says Chris, a former hairdresser, who remains unemployed and in therapy more than 12 months after losing his son.

Chris is still haunted by what his wife told him after she killed their son. “Freddy woke at 3am for a feed,” he recalls. “The next thing I know it’s 7am and Bec is shaking my shoulder, saying, ‘Chris, can you call the police? I’ve just killed him.’

“I raced into Freddy’s room shouting, ‘No, no, no!’ I called triple-0, tried to revive him and kept asking, ‘Why did you do it?’

For the full story see this week’s Woman’s Day, on sale September 14, 2009.

Do you think post-natal depression should be taken more seriously? Leave your comments below.

Stop the bullying, Kyle

Mat Rogers & Chloe Maxwell: How our son is beating autism

Kate Ritchie: I’m marrying my perfect man

John & Kelly: torn apart by grief

‘Bold’ star Hunter Tylo: I’ve dumped my cheating lover

I can’t lose my kids a second time

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Stop the bullying, Kyle

Both Magda Szubanski and Jackie O have endured a week of hell at the hands of radio’s Kyle Sandilands, writes Jonica Bray.

With her usual good grace and wit, Magda Szubanski put on a brave face last week after shock jock Kyle Sandilands launched into a bizarre string of on-air insults about her weight battle.

Shrugging off his comment that she was fat but “put her in a concentration camp and you watch the weight fall”, Magda said, “I couldn’t care less what Kyle Sandilands says about me.”

But despite her casual attitude, the popular comedienne is understood to be shattered at the jibes. Not only did his cruel comments undermine Magda’s highly publicised efforts to lose weight, they touched on a dark part of her personal history that she has undergone intensive therapy to come to terms with.

In the past, Magda has spoken publicly about how her beloved father was a decorated WWII fighter who was left scarred by experiences helping Polish Jews who were being persecuted.

Public opinion has been firmly behind Magda and anti Kyle, but there is another victim of his latest bullying attack — his long suffering on-air partner, Jackie O.

As our exclusive pictures show, Jackie is now close to cracking after a series of Kyle-led blunders have placed her own livelihood in jeopardy.

Desperately trying to pick up the pieces of her shattered career, Jackie’s life has yet again been thrown into turmoil because of her loud-mouthed radio sidekick.

In addition to the controversies of the past few weeks, Jackie was last week devastated to learn she had been officially voted one of Australia’s most hated personalities — pushing the radio star to near breaking point, and worrying friends who are urging her to break free from Kyle.

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Mat Rogers & Chloe Maxwell: How our son is beating autism

The star couple were devastated when their young son retreated into a shell. Now he’s been diagnosed with autism, they tell Katherine Chatfield he’s responding to treatment in leaps and bounds.

Max shrieks with delight as his mum chases him round the house pretending to be a monster. Giggling, he throws his arms round her, clasping his sticky fingers around her neck and giving her a kiss.

It might seem like perfectly normal behaviour for a three-year-old, but for Max’s parents, rugby legend Mat Rogers and wife Chloe Maxwell, the scene is truly remarkable; just eight weeks ago, Max could barely interact with anyone, let alone laugh or talk.

The bubbly blond boy was diagnosed with Autistic Spectrum Disorder in March, after Chloe and Mat noticed he appeared to be living in his own little world.

“When Max was about 18 months, he seemed to go backwards in the way he was developing,” Chloe tells Woman’s Day. “We used to ask him to show us his muscles and he’d give us a muscle-man pose. But he stopped doing that. Then he wouldn’t give Mat a kiss any more. He’d have quite violent tantrums for no reason and look at me like he wanted to kill me. That was so hard — he’s my little boy. One day I found him in the pantry stacking cans like he was obsessed. When I looked him in the eye it was like I couldn’t see him any more. He just wasn’t connecting with us.”

After several tests, Max was diagnosed with autism. “It means he finds it difficult to communicate and socialise with others,” explains the former Jeanswest model. Although she was relieved to know what was wrong, she struggled to come to terms with what the diagnosis meant for Max’s future.

But the strength of Mat and Chloe’s relationship has helped them cope with everything that’s been thrown at them.

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Kate Ritchie: I’m marrying my perfect man

After years of being a serial bride on TV, Kate Ritchie finally gets the chance to plan her own wedding. Erin Craven and Angela Mollard report.

Even as a child, Kate Ritchie’s romantic side was obvious. In between scenes on Home And Away, the now 31-year-old could often be seen singing into a mirror about wanting to find her perfect man. So, when it came time for her boyfriend of 16 months, Stuart Webb, to pop the question, it came as no surprise that the former rugby league star chose one of the most romantic destinations in the world — Italy’s Amalfi coastline.

With its cobblestone streets, and pastel-coloured buildings that appear to cling to the sheer Mediterranean cliffs, the glamorous fishing village of Positano was Stuart’s choice to finally propose to Kate, with the actress offering up a resounding “yes”.

“We told our families and we’re very excited and looking forward to celebrating with our families when we get home,” a delighted Kate announced last week, with the surprise engagement capping off what has become a year of highs for the popular personality.

Along with her successful gig co-hosting Sydney radio station Nova 969’s breakfast program with Merrick and Rosso, Kate won accolades earlier this year for her standout performance in Underbelly: A Tale of Two Cities, while also signing on to be a brand ambassador for Vaseline.

All the while, she says that Stuart has been an unwavering tower of support.

The couple began dating in May 2008 and have been living together, first in Stuart’s south-Sydney home and now in Kate’s much bigger Randwick house.

“He’s much more wonderful than I could ever have imagined,” Kate recently said. “Stuart’s a perfect partner.”

“They’re a great couple,” a friend tells Woman’s Day. “She’s a laid-back, lovely girl and they’re really great together.

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John & Kelly: torn apart by grief

An inconsolable John Travolta is retreating from the world and, writes Glen Williams, from his wife Kelly Preston.

In the still, quiet hours of a Florida morning, John Travolta casts a lonely shadow. Another sleepless night has brought him to his private tarmac, where he loses himself in his dark heartbroken thoughts.

Here, away from the glare of Hollywood stardom, John is a shattered, sad-faced father — a hurting man hopelessly lost since the sudden death of his only son, Jett. He spends hours deep in thought, sometimes aimlessly driving a golf cart back and forth.

Friends say his grief is driving him deeper into a lonely shell, and seemingly distancing him further from his wife Kelly Preston.

It’s an eerie scene, and one his concerned neighbours at the exclusive estate built around a private airport say is becoming all too frequent.

All the trappings of fame — his immense wealth and vast collection of aeroplanes — can’t soften his raw-edged misery.

At 55 years of age, John Travolta appears a broken man, crumbling beneath unspeakable grief.

While he spends much of his time in solitude with the curtains drawn, or on lonely golf cart rides in the darkness of early mornings, Kelly is also dealing with Jett’s death by throwing herself into her work.

“After Jett died, John and Kelly were totally bonded by their shared grief,” an insider close to the star couple says. But now they are coping very differently, which is creating “a gap between them that seems to be growing”.

“John wants to be alone. He has secluded himself in his Florida home, where he spends his time watching old movies and eating comfort foods like ice-cream. He stays in bed a lot and cries by himself. He cries every day and he’s not doing well,” says the source.

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*’Bold’* star Hunter Tylo: I’ve dumped my cheating lover

She’s come back from the dead twice on The Bold And The Beautiful, but Hunter Tylo’s dramatic off screen life continues to rival anything the show’s writers can come up with.

Talking exclusively to The Lowdown, tragedy-plagued Hunter, 47, reveals she has been forced to kick out her musician partner Corey Cofield and take out a restraining order following a string of incidents, including the disappearance of her pets, and financial irregularities.

“It was a bad soap opera,” she says of the two-year relationship. “I booted Corey out after I found a letter he’d left on my computer — a love letter to his old fiancée.

“He claimed he couldn’t contact her because he’d been out of town, but that he missed her.”

The latest humiliation was the final straw for Hunter after the star’s family begged her to bring an end to the relationship.

“I promised my mother on her deathbed that I would stop seeing Corey,” admits Hunter. “She gave me a big smile and told me, ‘See how mother knows best’.”

The soap favourite, whose mum passed away on August 3, has had a string of heartbreaks. Her daughter Katya, 11, lost an eye to cancer, and her 19-year-old son Michael died in 2007 after he had a seizure and fell into a pool.

“Corey took advantage of me when my defences were low after the death of my son,” Hunter says. “I cared deeply for him because I thought he was there for me when no-one else was. Then I found out he was engaged to another girl!”

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The recession gen Y has to have

Is this what was needed to teach young adults a few valuable financial lessons?
Empty jean pockets, Getty Images

ACCORDING to McCrindle Research’s Mark McCrindle, the global financial crisis was necessary for generation Y, which he describes as “the most materially endowed generation in history”. He argues that the financial downturn was necessary for young people to learn how to cope with an era different from the only one they have ever known, a time of economic growth.

The problem is gen Y (those born 1980-1994) have little or no resources to help them find and keep jobs, realise they need to pay down debt — particularly credit card debt — save money and learn to live with less affluence.

It may not be fair to say gen Y had to have this happen to them, but the previous generations certainly knew times of far less affluence. But surely there could have been an easier way for gen Y to learn these lessons. Not all the generations born since World War II — boomers (those born 1946-64), X (those born 1965-79), Y and even Z (those born since 1995) — needed a recession to learn how to manage debt.

However, had property prices kept going up at the rate they were prior to the GFC, gen Y and even Z may never have been able to enter the property market. Now, with more stabilised property prices, if they save their money, pay off credit cards, they can possibly enter the market.

Of course, there is often a flipside, in this case it’s that many banks have increased the minimum deposit they require and have done away with 100 percent home loans. The majority of lenders are now asking for at least a 10 percent deposit in Australia.

A bigger deposit really is the ideal scenario for all parties, but where that is not the case and an applicant is in stable employment with a good credit history, there is a way to enter the property market without the usual minimum of 10 per cent deposit.

A select few lenders will accept a 5 per cent deposit for a first home loan, as long as they are an existing customer (for at least six months) with good conduct on their accounts and can show a genuine saving history.

Learning to live with less affluence is not as bad as it might seem, especially when it’s pretty much the same story for everyone. You might find that none of the VIP things you thought you needed really mattered as much as having a secure financial future.

Your say: Do you think the recession was necessary for gen Y? How have you dealt with the GFC? Email us on [email protected]

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Fat that satisfies

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A study by researchers at the University of California, Irvine, published in Cell Metabolism, shows that foods which are rich in a “good” monounsaturated fat called oleic acid — namely avocadoes, olive oil, and nuts — actually curb hunger pangs.

How? The oleic acid triggers production of a fat-derived hormone called oleoylethanolamide (OEA): this carries a hunger-curtailing message to your brain where it activates a circuit that sends a message to your stomach that it is full and therefore, indirectly, may help reduce your body weight.

The researchers say their findings mean that OEA could form the basis of new anti-obesity drugs. In the meantime, up your intake of these foods to quiet your hunger response naturally.

Your say: What foods fill you up? Tell us below.

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The secrets of billionaires

You are probably so sick and tired of hearing about setting goals to achieve what you want. Some of you may even tune out when someone asks you to set goals because they have never really worked for you, in the past. Don't tune out now, because here are a few hints on how to make your goals work for you!
Getty Images

Getty Images

You are probably so sick and tired of hearing about setting goals to achieve what you want. Some of you may even tune out when someone asks you to set goals because they have never really worked for you, in the past. Don’t tune out now, because here are a few hints on how to make your goals work for you!

Most of the time you write goals down and they sit in a drawer or in a book, rarely to be viewed again. Well, those days are over! Try these few simple tips and you may be surprise at how your goals can be achieved.

Colour, colour, colour

Brightness or colour triggers your imagination and creativity centres in the brain. You are more likely to feel motivated every time you see the goals. Either put them on brightly coloured card or paper or write them in different colours on white paper. Don’t write them in a book! Make separate cards or pages for each goal!

Make a collage

Seeing your goals visually rather than in the written word can be more powerful. Use pictures, photos, quotes, words, drawings, paintings — anything that symbolises your goals. You can do one big collage or several small ones for each goal.

Paint or draw

If you artistically inclined, then paint or draw your goals. This gives it even more personal meaning.

Recordings/memories of the future

Record yourself saying your goals. Add in all of the feelings, thoughts, behaviours, activities that are going to help you reach your goal and how it will feel and look once you get there.

If you can help yourself visualise what you want to achieve and all of the feelings and experiences of the journey and the end result, you are more likely to be successful. This will be a great help when times get tough. You can also have music playing in the background for further motivation and emotional enhancement.

Quote cards

Some people find quotes very motivating and meaningful. If you are one of these people, put the quotes on brightly coloured paper or write them in bright colours. The next most important part of the process is the placement of your goals. You need to be strategic so that, most of the day, you are reminded of something you are moving towards.

A US survey found the only difference between millionaires and billionaires was the number of times they read or listened to their goals in a day! So are you going to be an average wage earner, a millionaire or a billionaire? Now is your turn to use this one little secret to improve your health and lifestyle.

Strategic placements could include:

  • on the vanity mirror in the bathroom;

  • behind the ensuite toilet door;

  • above your bed (so the statements are the first thing you see when you wake up and last thing before you go to sleep);

  • on your bed head;

  • on the fridge;

  • on your steering wheel;

  • in your CD player or digital music player in your office, car or home;

  • in your briefcase;

  • on your computer;

  • as a screensaver;

  • in your wallet; or

  • anywhere you can think of!

Reaching your goals also requires:

  • good planning;

  • realistic expectations;

  • belief in yourself, your own ability and that you deserve to achieve; and

  • focus, commitment, persistence, determination and hard work.

Hopefully this time you will may be a little more excited about setting goals and you may even achieve them. Be creative and have fun!

Kellee Waters is a psychologist and fitness coach at www.mindandbodypower.com.au

YOUR SAY: How do you remind yourself of your goals? How do you motivate yourself to exercise? What are your exercise goals? Share with us below…

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Home Page 5223

The secrets of billionaires

Getty Images

Getty Images

You are probably so sick and tired of hearing about setting goals to achieve what you want. Some of you may even tune out when someone asks you to set goals because they have never really worked for you, in the past. Don’t tune out now, because here are a few hints on how to make your goals work for you!

Most of the time you write goals down and they sit in a drawer or in a book, rarely to be viewed again. Well, those days are over! Try these few simple tips and you may be surprise at how your goals can be achieved.

Colour, colour, colour

Brightness or colour triggers your imagination and creativity centres in the brain. You are more likely to feel motivated every time you see the goals. Either put them on brightly coloured card or paper or write them in different colours on white paper. Don’t write them in a book! Make separate cards or pages for each goal!

Make a collage

Seeing your goals visually rather than in the written word can be more powerful. Use pictures, photos, quotes, words, drawings, paintings — anything that symbolises your goals. You can do one big collage or several small ones for each goal.

Paint or draw

If you artistically inclined, then paint or draw your goals. This gives it even more personal meaning.

Recordings/memories of the future

Record yourself saying your goals. Add in all of the feelings, thoughts, behaviours, activities that are going to help you reach your goal and how it will feel and look once you get there.

If you can help yourself visualise what you want to achieve and all of the feelings and experiences of the journey and the end result, you are more likely to be successful. This will be a great help when times get tough. You can also have music playing in the background for further motivation and emotional enhancement.

Quote cards

Some people find quotes very motivating and meaningful. If you are one of these people, put the quotes on brightly coloured paper or write them in bright colours. The next most important part of the process is the placement of your goals. You need to be strategic so that, most of the day, you are reminded of something you are moving towards.

A US survey found the only difference between millionaires and billionaires was the number of times they read or listened to their goals in a day! So are you going to be an average wage earner, a millionaire or a billionaire? Now is your turn to use this one little secret to improve your health and lifestyle.

Strategic placements could include:

  • on the vanity mirror in the bathroom;

  • behind the ensuite toilet door;

  • above your bed (so the statements are the first thing you see when you wake up and last thing before you go to sleep);

  • on your bed head;

  • on the fridge;

  • on your steering wheel;

  • in your CD player or digital music player in your office, car or home;

  • in your briefcase;

  • on your computer;

  • as a screensaver;

  • in your wallet; or

  • anywhere you can think of!

Reaching your goals also requires:

  • good planning;

  • realistic expectations;

  • belief in yourself, your own ability and that you deserve to achieve; and

  • focus, commitment, persistence, determination and hard work.

Hopefully this time you will may be a little more excited about setting goals and you may even achieve them. Be creative and have fun!

Kellee Waters is a psychologist and fitness coach at www.mindandbodypower.com.au

YOUR SAY: How do you remind yourself of your goals? How do you motivate yourself to exercise? What are your exercise goals? Share with us below…

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