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Victims of the Oscars Curse!

What do Sandra Bullock, Reese Witherspoon and Kate Winslet all have in common? They have all fallen victim to the Oscars love curse.

Although winning an Oscar is usually the highlight of any actresses’ career, these days it seems taking home the little golden statue might not be the best thing for long-lasting pairings.

Actresses recently bitten by the curse include Sandra Bullock, who only three weeks ago won Best Actress for The Blind Side and Kate Winslet, won best actress for The Reader at last year’s Oscars.

And actresses such as Reese Witherspoon – who won Best Actress for Walk the Line, Hilary Swank – who won Oscars for Million Dollar Baby and for Boy’s Don’t Cry, and Charlize Theron – who won for Monster, eventually all ended the relationships they were in at the time of winning the Oscar.

Sandra Bullock and Jesse James at the 2010 Oscars

Kate Winslet and Sam Mendes at the Oscars in 2009

Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe at the Oscars in 2006

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Sandra’s Husband’s shock cheating claims

Jesse James and Sandra Bullock

Jesse James and Sandra Bullock at the 2010 Oscars

Oscar-winning actress Sandra Bullock has pulled out of the London premiere of her new movie, The Blind Side, following claims her husband of five years Jesse James, had an affair, People magazine reported.

“Due to unforeseen personal reasons a trip abroad to support The Blind Side has been deemed impossible at this time,” the 45-year-old actress said in a media release.

“I apologise for any inconvenience this may have caused and thank you for your continued support of the film.”

The actress’ husband, who supported his wife throughout the awards season, allegedly had an 11-month affair with tattoo magazine cover girl Michelle “Bombshell” McGee.

The heavily tattooed model told US magazine In Touch that she was not aware Jesse and Sandra were still together at the time of their hook-up, while Sandra was shooting The Blind Side in Atlanta last year.

“I asked him, ‘What’s going on with you and Sandra?’ He said, ‘She doesn’t live here. She has a house in Austin. She is filming, and I can’t talk about it,” Michelle told the magazine.

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How to stop fighting over money

If spending habits are hurting your relationship, it’s time to act. Money is one of the top four causes of conflict in a relationship, according to Relationships Australia. No matter what we argue about — he spends too much, she hides the bills, there isn’t enough to go round — we do argue. And the dollars and cents may not even be the real issue.

“Most people fight about money because our families or origin impact how we regard money,” says Melbourne psychologist Meredith Fuller. “It can be an emotional issue, and no amount of financial advice can solve the problem.”

If yours was a family that did it tough, you’ll look at the world differently to a partner whose parents weren’t short of cash or believed things would always turn out for the best. Money isn’t just a stack of notes — it represents power, freedom, independence and security.

“Part of the problem is that we don’t talk about it enough,” says Melbourne financial counsellor Sheila Freeman. “It only comes up in a crisis. Ideally, you’d work through the bills together so you both know what it costs to live.”

Let’s face it, in the current climate we’re even more likely to have “heated debates” about money. Here’s how to stop those arguments turning into warfare.

Make it just about money

It’s hard, but avoid bringing up other relationship issues that have been bugging you. “Very often couples will scream and yell about money,” says psychologist Jane Haufbaum, “but they’re really arguing about sex, who’s doing the housework, or who isn’t putting the kids to bed. Money is an easy cause to latch onto.”

Sit down and discuss only the issues at hand. If you feel your partner has overspent, tell them that, but don’t use phrases like, “That’s so like you” or “I’ve told you before”. It will only escalate.

Remember you’re in this together

Screaming at each other won’t pay the mortgage. You have to work together, and the best way to do this is to write a mission statement for your finances. This might sound odd, but it works.

“Just write down your financial goals. It may be as immediate as, ‘We need to pay the mortgage next month’, or it might be, ‘We have to limit our outgoings by 30 percent’,” says Jane. “If you have a shared goal, you’ll both focus better.”

Play to your strengths

Think about your partner. Are they a planner? Do they love spreadsheets? Think about your own strengths and weaknesses, and when you draw up a budget, use the person with the relevant skills to organise key areas.

Talking about money problems

Pick a place that’s neutral territory and put a time limit on the talk. Don’t make it a blame session. Concentrate on ideas for managing better instead.

If one of you has trouble saving, try writing down every cent you spend to see exactly where the money is going. That way you can more easily work out where you can trim costs.

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How can I protect my friend from the man she loves?

This should be the time when my best friend Laura and I are making huge plans and laughing together all the time. Instead I can hardly bear to be in the same room with her.

She recently got engaged to a guy I think is the scum of the earth. She has only known Martin for a few months and we are all confident that he is using her because he works for her Dad.

She has never had a boyfriend before and is blind to everything except him.

He and I have never had a proper conversation as I find that he asks rude questions, never listens to anyone’s answers and says very inappropriately sexual statements.

Sadly he does not feel like ignoring me…

At their engagement dinner I had this nasty sensation of feeling itchy and nervous the whole night and I kept feeling like someone was staring at me.

I went to the bathroom after my speech halfway through the meal and Rebecca, Laura’s sister came in after me and asked if there was anything going on that we needed to talk about. It turns out he had been staring at me all night, even shifting in his seat at times to get a better view of me.

Rebecca was sure that Laura hadn’t noticed but she had heard some of the other guests talking about the relationship between him and me. I was so horrified that I wanted to throw up! In tears I told her that there was nothing going on and that I would never do anything like that to Laura. She hugged me and left me with her makeup to fix myself up.

Horrified I stayed in the bathroom for a while trying to pull myself together and feeling disgusted with everyone. That was a huge mistake; I never should have let Rebecca leave me by myself.

Suddenly the bathroom door opened and Martin walked into the ladies toilets and lent back on the door. I didn’t say anything and just focused on putting the makeup back into my bag.

He abruptly started talking for a while about how I was so much prettier than Laura and that I should show Laura how to dress and do her makeup. I couldn’t believe that no one was coming in, especially considering how packed the restaurant was. If only someone would come in then the conversation would have to end.

He then started talking about how I would look in a wedding dress and saying that Laura didn’t fit her dress properly but he thought that since I was bigger in some areas it would suit me more.

After hearing constantly from Laura how perfect Martin is and how much she loves him and he loves her I found it unbearable. I couldn’t take it any more after that and turned around to face him and told him that he should never talk like this to me again and focus on being with Laura.

I said that this was his last chance and that if he ever said anything like this to me or didn’t respect Laura I would make sure he would be out of our lives for good. I think he was happy to finally get a rise out of me because he smiled and started to come towards me as if to grab me.

He said that I had always been a challenge to him and that it was my fault he couldn’t stop thinking about me. I ran out of the bathroom, grabbed my coat and left the restaurant. I messaged that I had an upset stomach and Laura was so supportive and came over to see me the next day.

It has been a week and I still feel so ashamed and scared. I just wish that I knew what to do.

Picture: Getty Images. Posed by model.

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New research urges woman to have a healthy heart

New research urges woman to have a healthy heart

Woman may soon be monitoring their eating habits and cholesterol levels more closely after a French study discovered woman are more likely than men to die after suffering a heart attack.

Researchers at the University Hospital of Besancon in France have found that women who were admitted to hospital after suffering a heart attack were less likely than men to have follow-up treatments, Reuters reported.

Treatments include angiography, where blood vessels are injected with dye to find vessel blockages, and an angioplasty, which clears blockages.

The study, which monitored more than 3500 patients who were treated for heart attacks between January 2006 and December 2007, also found that women were twice as likely as men to die within a month of suffering a heart attack.

Chief cardiologist at the University Hospital of Besancon, Dr Francois Schiele, who presented the research at the American College of Cardiology meeting in Atlanta recently, said women should be treated with all recommended strategies, including invasive ones.

“This suggests that we could reduce mortality in female patients by using more invasive procedures,” he said.

In earlier major heart studies, the majority of patients have been men, leaving women largely understudied in comparison, Reuters reported.

However, these studies have also suggested women have a higher risk of death after a heart attack than men, with no clear indication why. But, researchers say the answer may lie in the biological differences between men and women.

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Overcoming excuses for health, fitness and survival

Getty Images

Getty Images

According to the latest figures, more than 60 percent of Australians are overweight or obese and don’t get enough exercise. Being fat and inactive has become the “norm”. You areabnormalif you are able to overcome your excuses and stay active and trim.

Don’t flog yourself

The cause of the problem is largely understood. We live in a world where physical activity has been designed out of our environment and lifestyle. It is harder to be active these days. So how do active people do it? Do they grapple with excuses and how do they overcome them? What are your excuses?

The psychology of an excuse

In psychological terms, excuses are part of your “decisional balance”. For example, you have a “thought bubble”, in which you weigh up the reasonsfor going for a lunchtime walk and the reasonsagainst it. If your list of reasonsagainst outweighs your list of reasonsforgoing for a walk, then you’ll probably find an excuse not to.

It’s interesting that if your list of reasons for and against are about equal, then you will feel in “two minds” about it and could be swayed, depending on the circumstances. When this happens, your final decision is based on how confident you are to go for a walk, even if there are tempting reasons not to. In contrast, active people will typically give you a long list of reasons for why they like to be active and their list of excuses will be short.

What’s your excuse?

Here’s a list of common excuses for not being active and how you can turn your negative into a positive.

Excuse: “I don’t have the time.”

Turn it around:This is false. Even the busiest people in the world make time to exercise. Have a lunchtime walk, run, swim or use a gym. If your workday is too busy, get up 30 minutes earlier in the morning. Write your exercise times into your weekly and daily scheduler.

Excuse:”I have one or more injuries which stops me.”

Turn it around:Another false belief. What you are saying is your old injury stopped you and you haven’t started again. Whether your injury was a knee replacement, back pain or paraplegia, physical activity is vital to your health and could be an important part of managing your pain and reducing the chance of re-injury.

Excuse:”I have family responsibilities.”

Turn it around:Find activities that include your partner and kids. For babies and young children, use a jogger pram to get out onto the trails for walks or runs. Get organised with drinks, snacks and distractions to keep the kids content. Break the activities into bite-sized pieces (less than 30 minutes) so your children don’t get bored.

Excuse:”I’m young. I don’t need it.”

Turn it around:Young people can feel anxious and worried about things in their lives. Physical activity helps to relieve tension and anxiety is a great mood regulator.

Excuse:”I’m too old.”

Turn it around:Physical activity benefits health at any age. For example, weight-bearing exercise, like walking, improves balance, coordination, strength and bone density and can reduce the chance of a fall. In fact, the benefits of exercise are clear which has lead to this famous cliché: “We don’t slow down because we get old, we get old because we slow down.”

Excuse:”I just can’t get motivated.”

Turn it around:Re-stated, you are saying you haven’t found an activity that you enjoy. One strategy is to find a friend to exercise with or book a session with a personal trainer. It helps to regularly try something you’ve never done before, like learning to paddle a kayak or ride a mountain bike.

Your first few times exercising after a long break can feel a little daunting. You may experience a little muscle soreness and fatigue but that’s normal and usually passes within a week. Take it easy and give your body time to adapt. After a week or two into your new routine, you’ll be loving it and wonder how anyone could come up with an excuse not be active.

Your say: How do you stay motivated to exercise? Which of these excuses do you use? Share your helpful hints below…

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I poisoned the school busy bee volunteers

My kids’ primary school had a busy bee during the school holidays so parent volunteers could get in and tidy up the large unruly gardens around the grounds of our school. We had a great turn out of about 15 parents and soon got into the work of stripping out the dead plants and making everything look neat and tidy again.

Just before morning tea time, one of the parents announced she’d brought in cakes and fruit for everyone to share.

As the school was locked for the holidays, the only room we had access to was the gardener’s shed. Thankfully the gardener kept tea, coffee and sugar in his shed and another parent had thought to bring a flask of milk, so we were able to stop for hot drinks with our snack.

As everyone was busy, I volunteered to make the drinks and made my way to the gardener’s shed which was out on the other side of the school.

I noticed when I was in the shed that the gardener kept the tea and coffee containers on the same shelf as the pesticides, but it seemed okay as the supplies were in sealed tins.

I made the drinks up and had them on a tray, carrying them across the school grounds, when I realised I hadn’t stirred the sugar into the drinks.

After morning tea, a few people were starting to complain they felt sick. We put it down to the summer heat and started work on the gardens on the other side of the school.

As we got to the bank of trees where I had snapped the twig off the branch to stir the coffees, one of the parents mentioned that the trees were highly poisonous Oleanders and that we needed to wear gloves before pruning the branches as they contained a highly toxic sap.

It was only at this stage, that I started to think that stirring the drinks with a fresh Oleander twig may have been a mistake, but I was sure that the few drops of sap that had gone in the cups wouldn’t have been enough to make anyone sick….

A few hours later, about half the parents were complaining of stomach pains and were feeling sick. It got so bad we had to cancel the busy bee and all went home.

I found out a few days later that nearly all the volunteers had got bad stomach cramps (myself included) and one parent had ended up in hospital, but was now doing okay.

I didn’t know how to confess what I’d done. I didn’t know Oleanders were poisonous and would never have harmed anyone on purpose. In fact, I’d made myself quite sick as well.

When the parents got together again at the start of school this year, they all discussed what could have made them so unwell. It was decided in the end that it was either the cakes and fruit that had sat all morning in the hot car or somehow the gardener’s drink supplies had become contaminated with the pesticides he kept in there.

I’m thankful that everyone recovered with no real ill effects, but I still feel really bad that the parent and the gardener got the blame.

The mother kept apologising to everyone about her food and the gardener has now been banned from keeping any food products in his shed. They’re both so sorry to have caused everyone to be so sick, when I still think the finger should probably be pointed at me.

I think this year I’ll stick to what I know and only put my hand up for classroom volunteer work instead.

Picture: Getty Images. Posed by model.

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Kate Winslet suddenly single

Kate Winslet and Sam Mendes

Oscar-winning actress Kate Winslet has split up with her husband of six years, director Sam Mendes.

In the statement released through their lawyers, the pair said they were “saddened to announce their separation”, People magazine reported.

“Kate and Sam are saddened to announce that they separated earlier this year,” the statement read. “The split is entirely amicable and is by mutual agreement. Both parties are fully committed to the future joint-parenting of their children. They ask that the media respect the privacy of the family.”

The pair, who married in 2003, have one son together aged six and Kate has a daughter from her previous marriage to director Jim Threapleton.

Sam directed 34-year-old Kate in Revolutionary Road, a story about a marital breakdown, for which she won a Golden Globe for best actress.

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Kylie all cashed up!

Kylie Minogue

Kylie at Paris fashion week (right) and performing her showgirl tour

After being in the spotlight for 23 years most singers slowly creep into “has-been” status, but not our Kylie! Not only is she as popular as ever, she continues to bring in the big bucks.

According to financial documents for her Darenote company lodged at Companies House in Britain, the 41-year-old pop star earns more than $18,000 a day , the UK’s Daily Mail reported.

Her extremely steady pay packet is said to be thanks to her 2008-09 world tour, as well as ongoing record sales and royalties.

Financial experts suggested that Kylie’s situation is quite unique considering she has been in the limelight for such a long time.

“They are very healthy figures for any business,” a financial expert told the Daily Mail. “But for a singer who has been around for quite a long time it is incredible to be still earning money at this level. There are few pop stars who can sustain themselves at the top for so long. This shows that Kylie Minogue is among that select band.”

The pint-sized singer has recently suggested in interviews that she will release a new album in the next few months and is also rumored to be discussing starting a family with her Spanish boyfriend, Andrés Ve lencoso.

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Sara-Marie’s amazing new look!