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Australia goes mad for the monarch

Australia goes mad for the monarch

A fan tries to get a picture of Queen Elizabeth on a mobile phone at Parliament House.

When Queen Elizabeth arrived at St John’s Anglican Church in Canberra this morning the crowd erupted into cheers of ‘God save the queen’.

In a country populated by people who usually only scream chants if they contain the words ‘Aussie’ and ‘Oi’ this behaviour was remarkable.

But from the moment the Elizabeth and Prince Philip arrived in Australia last Wednesday, the country has been monarch mad.

In pictures: Queen Elizabeth’s visit to Australia

The airport was packed with screaming well-wishers, the shores of Lake Burley Griffin were crammed with flag-toting followers and giddy fans flocked to Floriade from as far away Adelaide and Cairns.

The excitement reached fever pitch on Friday evening when her majesty’s presence at an official reception at Parliament House created scenes more readily associated with rock concerts than royal visits.

As the queen tottered across the ballroom she was practically mobbed by the crowd of distinguished guests, with those out of curtseying distance thrusting their mobile phones into the air desperately trying to capture Her Royal Highness in a photo.

These scenes suggest the queen’s visit has been an overwhelming success — despite years of rumblings about Australia becoming a republic, the monarch is more popular than ever.

But while Australians have been overjoyed with the visit, the British media has been less than thrilled, particularly with the conduct of Prime Minister Julia Gillard.

The papers were disgusted with Gillard’s “refusal” to curtsey upon meeting the queen, not to mention the fact that she wasn’t wearing a hat when she did it.

The Daily Mail published a scathing article on the topic under the headline “A hatless Julia Gillard failed to curtsey for the queen”.

The newspaper was even more outraged two days later when Julia bowed again instead of curtseying, writing, “The pm STILL refuses to curtsey for the queen!”

Gillard also came under fire from the Daily Mirror, which was horrified by her “refusal” to sing the British national anthem at the official Parliament House reception, despite loudly singing the Australian one.

“Australian PM’s new snub against British national anthem during queen’s visit,” the headline read.

In pictures: Previous royal visits to Australia

Gillard aside, the British press seem pleased with how the tour is progressing and gleefully note how well their head-of-state is received by her antipodean subjects.

The queen and Prince Philip will visit Brisbane tomorrow, and will tour Melbourne and Perth before returning to England on Saturday.

Your say: Why do you think Australia has given such a warm welcome to the queen?

Video: Hundreds flock to see the queen

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Amazing celebrity weight loss

A dramatically slimmed-down Dawn French stole the spotlight from stars half her age at an event in London last week.

The 53-year-old comedienne has lost more than 25kg in the past few months and was keen to show it off in a sparkly black dress at the Galaxy National Book Awards.

Dawn – who split from Lenny Henry her husband of 25 years in April – said she was eating healthily for the first time in her life.

Check out these pictures of Dawn and other stars who have lost a lot of weight.

Comedienne Dawn French was unrecognisable from her 2009 self last week.

Jennifer Hudson in January 2007, and looking super-svelte in September this year.

Kirstie Alley’s weight has yo-yoed for years. Here she is in 2010, and this year.

Oprah Winfrey has also struggled with her weight. Here she is in 2008, and 2010.

Janet Jackson is another yo-yo dieter. Here she is in 2005 and 2007.

Magda has dropped several dress sizes recently. Here she is in 2002 and 2011.

Kelly Osbourne in 2005 and November last year.

Britney Spears in 2001, looking larger in 2007 and great again this year.

Sarah Ferguson was dubbed ‘The Duchess of Pork’. Here she is in 2007 and now.

Lily Allen has also struggled with her weight. Here she is in 2007 and again in 2009.

Funnyman Mikey Robbins in 2003 and again in 2007.

Director Peter Jackson in 2002,and almost unrecognisable in 2009.

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How to read his moods

How to read his moods

Image: Getty, posed by models

If you’re losing your mind trying to figure out what’s going on in his head, our guide to male moods will save your sanity!

Does your partner’s mind sometimes seem as hard to read as ancient hieroglyphs? Before you let your imagination wander into scenarios involving his younger secretary, we asked David Cutler, manager of the Men and Family Relationships Program at Relationships Australia, to help us decipher what his moods mean.

So what should you do? “Try to identify the current behaviour rather than getting defensive or adding to the anxiety by interrogating,” says Cutler. “Have a guess at something such as ‘It seems like you’re under a lot of stress’ or ‘Is everything okay at work?’ You don’t want to question because guys will close down if they’re being interrogated.”

There could be a number of underlying reasons for his sexual withdrawal. “If they’re feeling powerless or inadequate at home or the workplace, they close down in a state of confusion,” explains Cutler. A non-confrontational approach will get you the best results. “Do some active listening, not pushing. Try to tease out what might be going on.”

A nurturing attitude towards both your child and your partner can help alleviate these feelings. “A ‘let’s do this together’ [approach] is really helpful,” says Cutler.

“One of the guys [in a counselling group] said, ‘If I said that, my partner would say, ‘Get yourself a skirt’. It can make the guy feel pretty rubbish and it puts the cap on the bottle. He thinks, ‘I’m never going to tell you how I’m feeling if you make fun of me or if you don’t acknowledge and don’t listen.'”

Cutler believes communication is the key to a healthy relationship but it takes practice. “Doing some of the courses at Relationships Australia can enable couples to talk in a new way. They’re really helpful.”

For more information on these courses and other counselling options, contact Relationships Australia on 1300 364 277 or go to www.relationships.org.au.

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Queen Elizabeth takes on parliament on day 2

Queen Elizabeth takes on parliament on day two

Queen Elizabeth receives Julia Gillard at Government House this morning.

Queen Elizabeth started the second day of her Australian tour with not one, but two, awkward bows from Julia Gillard.

The monarch spent the morning in meetings with the prime minister, and, later, Opposition leader Tony Abbott.

Gillard was the first to be received at Government House, greeting the queen with bows and a handshake instead of the customary curtsey.

In pictures: Queen Elizabeth’s visit to Australia

The prime minister and the queen discussed the latter’s visit to the Floriade flower show and Canberra’s sunny weather.

“It’s a beautiful morning again,” the monarch said.

The queen went on to say she was delighted with her visit to Floriade, and was touched volunteers had worked so hard to ensure the show, which officially closed last Sunday, was back to its full glory for her visit.

“I had no idea they do that every year. I can’t believe they did it all up,” she told the prime minister.

The rest of the queen’s conversation with Gillard and her later discussion with Abbott will remain confidential in accordance with royal protocol.

In pictures: Previous royal visits to Australia

The queen is expected to spend the rest of the afternoon resting before attending an official reception at Parliament House tonight.

She will make an address at the event, which is being hosted by Julia Gillard. It will be the monarch’s only public speech while she is in Canberra.

For photos from the reception and details of the queen’s speech, visit aww.com.au tomorrow morning.

Your say: Do you think Julia Gillard should have curtsied for the queen?

Video: Queen visits Floriade

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Queen Elizabeth praises Australia in rousing address

Queen Elizabeth praises Australia in rousing address

Queen Elizabeth, Prince Philip and Julia Gillard at Parliament House this evening.

Queen Elizabeth gave a rousing address at Parliament House this evening, praising Australian’s bravery, generosity and fortitude.

The 85-year-old monarch was the picture of poise as she delivered her only public address during her stay in Canberra.

In pictures: Queen Elizabeth’s visit to Australia

She began by expressing her joy at being back on Australian shores again, and went on to describe how the country has grown during 59 years on the throne.

“Prince Philip and I are delighted to be back in Australia,” she said. “I find it difficult to believe that it is already five years since our last visit.

“Ever since I first came here in 1954, I have watched Australia grow and develop at an extraordinary rate. This country has made dramatic progress economically, in social, scientific and industrial endeavours and, above all, in self-confidence.”

The monarch also lauded Australia’s economy, scientific achievements and contributions to “world peacekeeping”. She then paid tribute to everyone affected by the Queensland and Victorian floods, Cyclone Yasi and the Christchurch earthquake.

“The world witnessed the anguish of Australians as they lived through a summer of natural disasters,” she said.

“We were all impressed by the courage and resolution shown by those affected, in the face of crippling desolation. Prince William also saw first-hand the fortitude of people during this testing time.”

Prime Minister Julia Gillard honoured the queen in her speech, praising the royal’s dedication to Australia over her years as sovereign.

Gillard also alluded to the possibility of Australia becoming a republic in the future, but reassured the queen that no matter what happened, Australians would honour and respect her as long as she lived.

“Your Majesty, we do not know where Australia’s path of nationhood may lead in the times to come,” Gillard said.

“We are, as you once so rightly said, ‘a country on the move and will go on being so’. But we know this for a certainty: your journey of service will continue all the length your of days.

Opposition leader Tony Abbott also addressed the reception, and was a surprise hit, keeping guests in fits of laughter throughout his speech.

“Your Majesty, while 11 Australian prime ministers and no less than 17 opposition leaders have come and gone, for 60 years you have been a presence in our national story and given the vagaries of public life, I’m confident that this will not be the final tally of the politicians that you have outlasted,” he quipped.

Abbott also poked fun at Prince Philip’s infamous sense of humour, recalling an anecdote about the Duke and Cate Blanchett.

“To your Royal Highness, Prince Philip, may I say that you have brought humanity and irreverence to what might otherwise be a stuffy institution,” he said.

“When introduced to Cate Blanchett as someone who works in movies, you asked her whether she could help to fix the palace DVD. Only locals are allowed to joke about our Cate so that makes you at least an honorary Australian.”

In pictures: Previous royal visits to Australia

On a more serious note, Abbott spoke in support of ending discrimination against women in Britain’s line of succession and allowing royals to marry Catholics.

The royal couple spent 45 minutes mingling with guests before returning to Government House.

Tomorrow, the queen will attend a Trooping of the Colour ceremony at the Royal Military College, Duntroon.

Your say: Do you think Queen Elizabeth has been a good head of state for Australia?

Video: Queen Elizabeth visits Floriade

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‘Tiny’ Queen meets 7ft basketballer

'Tiny' Queen meets 7ft basketballer

Queen Elizabeth with basketball player Elizabeth Cambage at Parliament House this evening.

As a queen, Elizabeth II is not used to looking up to anyone — but she had to crane her neck tonight when she came face-to-face with a 7ft female basketball player

The 5ft 4in monarch was visibly delighted when she bumped into Australian Opals forward Elizabeth Cambage, 20, at an official reception at Parliament House hosted by Prime Minister Julia Gillard.

Elizabeth — who is 6ft 8in but was taller this evening thanks to a pair of kitten heels — was stunned when the queen approached her, smiling and with a twinkle in her eyes.

In pictures: Queen Elizabeth’s visit to Australia

“She said straight away, ‘You must be a basketball player,'” Elizabeth said. “I said, ‘What gave it away?’ and the queen laughed. She is very quick.

“She’s a tiny little delicate thing but she’s very sweet. She carries herself so well and made the time to talk to as many people as possible.”

Elizabeth says she has always been tall, but reached her current height aged 15. She has been a professional basketball player for four years.

Your say: What do you like about Queen Elizabeth?

Video: Queen Elizabeth visits Floriade

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It’s official: Men are funnier than women

It's official: Men are funnier than women

In what is sure to incite some fiery debate between the sexes, a recent study has found that men are funnier than women… just.

The University of California San Diego found that men held the title by the slimmest of margins, with research — published in the Psychonomic Bulletin and Review — showing men won by just 0.11 points, the Huffington Post reports.

Researchers used a novel method of reaching this conclusion, tasking 16 male and 16 female undergraduates with writing humorous captions for 20 New Yorker comics.

A judging panel — made up of 34 males and 47 females (just in case you thought that’s where the bias might have been hiding) — used a system of elimination to determine the results.

The judging seemed to indicate that the men found the other men funny, which was bad news for those looking for a boost in the romance stakes.

“Sad for the guys,” the report’s co-author Nicholas Christenfeld said, “who think that by being funny they will impress the ladies, but really just impress other men who want to impress the ladies.”

Christenfeld also suggested that men might be slightly ahead as they try harder to get a laugh and do so more often.

Thousands of women silently nod their heads.

Your say: Do you think men are funnier than women? Tell us at [email protected]

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One woman, 20 personalities

One woman, 20 personalities

Kim Noble and her book All of Me.

Subjected to incalculable child abuse, Kim Noble’s young mind shattered into multiple personalities when she was just three years old. In an exclusive extract from her autobiography, this extraordinarily brave woman explains how she survived, became a mother and what it feels like to live a life literally in pieces.

Kim Noble was born on 21 November 1960. She grew up in Britain with her parents and sister and enjoyed an ordinary family upbringing.

Her parents both worked and, from a very early age, Kim was left with a number of childminders — although they weren’t called that in the 1960s.

True crime: Two wives, two murders, one killer

Sometimes it was family, sometimes neighbours, sometimes friends. Communities stepped in to help in those days. Most were kind and loving.

Some were different. They didn’t look after Kim Noble. They took advantage. They subjected baby Kim to painful, evil, sexual abuse. Regularly and consistently from the age of one.

Kim was helpless. She couldn’t speak. She couldn’t complain. She couldn’t fight. She didn’t even know that the abuse was wrong. But she did know it scared her. She knew it hurt.

Yet she was so small, so weak, so dependent on her abusers for so much, what could she possibly do? And then her young, infant mind found a way. If it couldn’t stop Kim’s physical pain, it could do the next best thing. It could hide.

At some point before her third birthday, Kim Noble’s mind shattered, like a glass dropped onto a hard floor. Shards, splinters, fragments, some tiny, some larger.

No two pieces the same, as individual as snowflakes. Ten, 20, 100, 200 pieces, where before there had been just one. And each of them a new mind, a new life to take Kim’s place in the world. To protect her.

At last, Kim Noble was happy. No one could find her now.

Chicago, September 2010. I never imagined the day I would find myself sitting in a television studio on the other side of the Atlantic.

I certainly never expected to be invited by the most powerful woman in world media, Oprah Winfrey, to appear during the final season of the planet’s leading chat show.

But here I am and, as I take my seat facing Oprah’s chair, I can barely contain my nerves. The most-watched program in America is about to be filmed and I am that episode’s star guest.

And yet, as soon as Oprah sits down opposite, my inhibitions disappear.

“Do you remember what happened to you as a child?”

Three hundred people fall suddenly silent. A few sharp intakes of breath. Then nothing, as they all crane forward expectantly for my reply.

“I remember parts of it,” I reply. “Not any abuse.”

Murmurs buzz around that vast hangar of a room. Oprah looks momentarily thrown. If you watch carefully you can almost see her thinking, I was told this woman had been abused!

Oprah maintains her composure. Then, ever the professional, she rephrases the question.

My answer is the same. “No one did anything to me.” But I know what she means and decide to help her out. “I have never been abused,” I clarify. “But this body has.” And then she understands.

Throughout our interview, Oprah referred to me as “Kim”. I don’t mind. I’ve grown up with people calling me that. It’s all I ever heard as a child, so it soon becomes normal.

I’ve grown up accepting lots of things that seemed normal at the time. Like finding myself in classrooms I didn’t remember travelling to, or speaking to people I didn’t recognise or employed doing jobs I hadn’t applied for.

Normal for me is driving to the shops and returning home with a boot full of groceries I didn’t want. It’s opening my wardrobe and discovering clothes I hadn’t bought or taking delivery of pizzas I didn’t order.

It’s finding the washing-up done a second after I’d finished using the pans. It’s ending up at the door to a men’s toilet and wondering why. It’s so many, many other things on a daily basis.

Crime: I’m haunted by my daughter’s murder

Oprah found it unimaginable. I doubt she was alone. I imagine millions of viewing Americans were thinking, “This is mad!”

After all, it’s not every day you meet someone who shares their body with more than 20 other people — and who still manages to be a mum to a beautiful, well-balanced teenaged daughter and an artist with many exhibitions to her name.

To me, this is normal.

&copy 2011 Kim Noble, extracted fromAll Of Me, published by Piatkus, $35.

Read more of this story in the October issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly.

Your say: Do you know anyone who suffers from a similar condition?

Subscribe to 12 issues of The Australian Women’s Weekly for just $69.95 and receive a FREE The Christmas Collection Cookbook, valued at $49.95. That’s a 15% saving on the retail price.

Video: Mental health for young people

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Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip all smiles on day one

Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip all smiles on day one of the royal tour.

Queen Elizabeth at Floriade.

Queen Elizabeth beamed throughout her visit to Floriade today, and the Duke of Edinburgh seemed heartily amused with the first official engagement of the couple’s 16th Australian tour.

The 85-year-old monarch and her 90-year-old husband took a barge from Government House to the annual Canberra flower show.

In pictures: Queen Elizabeth’s visit to Australia

After a few tense moments while a blushing naval officer struggled to moor the boat, the queen emerged smiling broadly and adeptly deploying her famous ‘royal wave’.

The monarch looked lovely in a Lavender-coloured outfit with matching hat and her ever-present black handbag.

Prince Philip was similarly dashing in a suit and jaunty hat, and took time to smile and wave at crowds while Elizabeth accepted flowers and gifts from local children.

The royal couple then got into a Range Rover for the short drive into the centre of the gardens, before getting out to stroll through the displays of flowers.

The queen took great interest in the flora, asking a multitude of botanical questions of her guides, including Floriade’s head gardener.

Philip, on the other hand, seemed to find the whole affair rather amusing, cracking jokes almost continuously.

“The queen was asking lots of questions, smiling and seemed very interested,” Floriade volunteer Ankie Dunn said.

“She obviously loves flowers but the Duke… he has a very dry sense of humour. He certainly made a lot of comments. We couldn’t hear what he was saying, but he was chuckling away.”

In pictures: Princess Diana in Australia

Nicknamed the ‘Duke of Hazard’ by British media outlets, Philip is infamous for his many gaffes.

In his 60 years as royal consort, he has said hundreds of culturally insensitive things, including asking a driving instructor in Scotland how he kept the locals sober long enough to pass their tests, quizzing a group of Australian aborigines if they were “still throwing spears” and enquiring how a British student trekking in Papua New Guinea had managed to avoid being eaten by the “natives”. If he said any similar comments today, the volunteers who overheard were keeping it to themselves.

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Pre-eclampsia breakthrough

Pre-eclampsia breakthrough

Pregnant women with pre-eclampsia or those at risk of developing the condition will be encouraged to learn that a study published by the British Medical Journal has suggested particular dietary supplements can significantly reduce their risk of having the abnormally high blood pressure and other symptoms which can lead to premature birth.

A team of researchers in Mexico and the USA provided a group of women who were at high risk of developing pre-eclampsia with two nutrition bars daily, each containing the amino acid l-arginine and antioxidant vitamins C and E.

Health news: Pinch the salt from your diet

They found that the women taking the l-arginine and vitamins combination were nearly 10 percent less likely to develop pre-eclampsia than those taking bars containing just the vitamins.

Although the exact reason why the combination works is not fully understood, the study concludes that it is a “relatively simple and low cost intervention in reducing the risk of pre-eclampsia and associated preterm birth”.

Your say: Do you know anyone who has had pre-eclampsia?

Video: Miracle babies who have defied the odds

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