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Working mums aren’t in it for the money

Working mums aren't in it for the money

Image: Getty, posed by models

A new US study has found that although working mums are busy, that’s the way they like it.

The study, which surveyed employed mothers, found that most would work even if they didn’t have to, however, they were also looking for new ways at being the ideal employee managing both motherhood and work commitments.

Unlike earlier research this study, which was published in Gender & Society, highlighted that the employed mothers emphasised the benefits they, and their children, receive from their paid work.

Carried out by Karen Christopher, an associate professor of Women’s/Gender Studies and Sociology at the University of Louisville, the study found that both married and single mothers said they found more fulfilment and gained self-confidence from paid work than in parenting.

This is the essential reason why they chose not to stay at home with their children full time.

Although the women studied said that they enjoyed their careers, they also put limitations on how much they work. In fact, many of the women said they sought out employment by looking for employers that did not demand long hours, this also included high-powered professions such as lawyers.

The study was conducted by surveying a group of young mothers, from Canada and the US of different racial/ethnic backgrounds, class and marital status. Most women in the study were born between 1970 and 1985 with 40 working mothers, each having at least one child under the age of five and over half the women had two children.

Although each mothers’ situation is different, associate professor Christopher said almost all of them wanted to work.

She said that while these mums are not spending intensive amounts of time with their kids, they see themselves as involved parents who are “in charge” of their children’s lives.

“About one-third of the 40 employed mothers expressed some ambivalence or guilt over their employment, but most employed mothers justified their paid work by saying it made them more fulfilled people, in addition to better mothers,” she said.

“So, these mothers are not only reframing what good mothering entails, they also frame employment in ways different than do earlier studies of mothers.”

In the US mothers’ employment rates have risen. In 2010, about two-thirds of North American mothers with young children worked outside of the home.

Your say: How do you feel about this study? Share your thoughts below.

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How to save money this school year

As children head back to school, parents breathe a collective sigh of relief — but that relief may be short-lived as the bills start to pile up. Get an 'A' in budgeting wih these handy tips.
Back to school savings

School fees

After a mortgage, education costs can be one of the family’s biggest expenses, so it pays to plan carefully. Some families choose to use a dedicated education savings plan, managed fund or a high-interest savings account to prepare for the cost. By making regular deposits into the savings tool of your choice, it can help spread the cost of education and may also earn some interest.

Education expenses

When budgeting for annual education costs, it helps to make a list of all the expected expenses. While fees, uniforms, shoes and stationery are the obvious ones, don’t forget school camps and excursions, music lessons, sporting activities, internet access and computers. Keep a list of all major events and expenses during the year so you can set aside money and won’t be hit with unexpected last-minute bills.

Shopping for a bargain

If you have children in high school then the cost of text books can add up. These items are generally only needed for one year, so why not see if your child’s school has a second-hand book scheme or a swap program. For items you need to buy, try discount stores. Additionally, most chain stores have sales at the start of the year where you can pick up cheap bags, lunch boxes and other necessities. Cost can always be reduced if you shop around and putting name tags on all your kid’s belongings will ensure you don’t have the added expense of replacing lost items.

Tax advantages

Take advantage of any family and childcare benefits available to you, such as the Education Tax Refund if eligible. This benefit offers up to 50 per cent back on a range of children’s education expenses, including items such as computers, software, textbooks, stationary and even uniforms. Just don’t forget to keep your receipts.

Lunch box savings

With many families time-poor, it’s often easier to send your kids to school with lunch money rather than a packed lunch, yet a packed lunch is one of the easiest ways to cut costs on a daily basis. This money saver takes a little extra effort, but the rewards are twofold. Aside from preparing a healthy lunch for your child, it also ends up costing you far less over the course of the year.

Pocket money

The start of a new school year is often the time when families review pocket money. How much you give can depend on the age of the child, how much disposable income you want them to have, and what they are expected to do to earn it. For example, many kids are “paid” for doing household chores such as mowing lawns or washing the car. By paying pocket money online into a low-fee savings account, your kids can also login to watch their balance grow. This helps eliminate any frivolous dipping into cash so they can save for the things they really want.

Back to school expenses can seem endless, but with some pre-planning it is possible to take the sting out of the cost.

Dianne Charman is an AMP financial planner and mother of two.

Any advice given is general only and has not taken into account your objectives, financial situation or needs. Because of this, before acting on any advice, you should consult a financial planner to consider how appropriate the advice is to your objectives, financial situation and needs.

To find your nearest AMP financial planner visit www.amp.com.au/findaplanner.

Your say: How to you make sure you have enough money for school expenses?

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School-day blues

Getty Images

Getty Images

New people, new places, new friends, new faces — starting school is a huge change for any child. But what if the one struggling to adapt is you?

Your “baby” is no longer a baby. You’ve watched them crawl, stumble and finally find their feet, and now they’re off to school, leaving you at home with a lump in your throat.

Related: Quick and easy lunch box fillers

They’re learning new things and enjoying their independence, but you’re probably experiencing a huge sense of loss. And that’s perfectly normal, says Anna Cohen, senior clinical psychologist at Kids & Co Clinical Psychology.

“When a child starts school, the mum often feels as if she’s handing over responsibility for that child to someone else,” Anna says. “It can be difficult to let go of something so important.”

Difficult, but not impossible.

Change your thinking

“Starting school marks the end of a developmental stage and means huge changes to your family life,” Anna says. The trick is to think of those changes as something necessary for your child’s development.

“We try to help parents see that their child has a ‘job’ to do,” Anna says. “That job is to complete certain developmental tasks, such as learning from their mistakes, understanding the consequences of breaking rules, developing self-control and responsibility, and learning to cooperate with others.”

As a parent it’s possible — and important — to help your child with those tasks. “Be a source of information,” Anna says. “Be clear with them about routines. Let them experience the consequences of their actions at home. Help them learn how to do things for themselves.”

Fill the gap

A problem for some stay-at-home mums is filling the hours when their child is at school. “When you’re used to your day revolving around caring for someone, it can come as a shock when they’re not there anymore,” Anna says. “The secret is to stay busy, so try creating an activity schedule for yourself.”

Perhaps you’ve always wanted to take up a hobby, have more time to exercise, or simply read all those books that have been gathering dust on your shelf. As long as you’re not sitting around waiting for school to finish you’ll be doing yourself a favour — and we all need a little “me” time now and then.

“Make sure you schedule in some quality ‘child’ time too,” Anna says. “Once they start school it can feel as if you never have any special time with them. It doesn’t have to be something major — Friday afternoon milkshakes or a bedtime story can work wonders.”

**Get involved

** Don’t see school as something you are excluded from. You might not be there with your child, but you can still be involved in their day. “Know what your child likes and what’s all the rage at school,” Anna says. “Whether it’s Zac Efron, Nintendo DS or a cartoon character, find out about it so you know what they’re talking about.”

It’s also worth meeting with the teacher at the start of term to see what your child will be learning about. Then you can build on that at home by reading bedtime stories or drawing pictures on the same subject.

“Being involved like this allows you to feel connected, which is important as feeling disconnected is a big worry for mums,” Anna says. Some schools even provide the opportunity for parents to be involved in lessons or school excursions, so ask staff for details.

Stay strong

Finally, be aware that however you feel about your child going to school will probably rub off on them. “Children are very perceptive, so it’s important to stay positive,” Anna says. “If you feel confident that you and your child can cope, so will they.”

Related: Parents DO have a favourite child

Starting school can be hard enough for some children, and seeing you weep at the school gates will make it even harder. So stay strong, stay involved and enjoy the peace and quiet!

Your say: Did you find it difficult when your child went to school?

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Katherine Heigl’s adorable daughter stars in music clip

Katherine Heigl and Josh Kelly show off their adorable daughter

Katherine Heigl and her country music singer husband Josh Kelley have shown off their adorable little girl in his new music video.

The couple’s adopted three-year-old daughter Naleigh Moon stars in the video clip of the song named after her.

Katherine, who directed the video, made it a truly family affair.

“The idea was to show how Naleigh changed our lives, Josh’s life specifically,” she told Parent and Child magazine.

The clip features family home videos while Josh sings of the love he has for his little girl which the pair adopted in from Korea in 2009.

And there might even be a little brother or sister on the way for Naleigh with her parents hinting that they would consider adopting again.

“I just wanted to be a mum. So however we do that, it’s fine with me. I’d like to adopt again,” Katherine said.

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Mary and Fred’s public marriage meltdown

Mary and Fred's public marriage meltdown

A startling quarrel between Denmark’s royal couple shatters the fairytale of their seven-year romance.

In a rare glimpse of the strain behind their seemingly perfect marriage, Crown Prince Frederik and Crown Princess Mary have had a disturbing fight, despite the eyes of the world being on them.Glaring at each other, hunching their shoulders and pursing their lips, it was a portrait of the strained couple the palace never wanted you to see.

During a month of celebrations commemorating the 40th anniversary of Queen Margrethe’s coronation, the couple had clearly had enough of the festivities – and each other. First Mary, who is rarely seen without a placid smile, leans into a grumpy looking Frederik as he mutters something to her. Upset and seething, she purses her lips and looks away.

Finally Fred assumes a haughty expression as he glares past his wife, clearly bored and irritated. It’s the kind of exchange shared by many couples, but it’s one we rarely see from this pair, who normally present a united front. What makes the tense scene even more surprising is that it has come at a time when the spotlight is fixed firmly on Denmark’s royals.

With the cream of European society gathered in Copenhagen to mark Margrethe’s ruby anniversary on the throne, there could hardly have been a more public way for the couple to have displayed their marital tension. There’s little doubt that pictures, taken during an exhibition of the Queen’s couture at Amelienborg Palace earlier this month, are a sign that the pressure of raising four young children is getting to the couple.

Read more about Princess Mary and Prince Frederik’s argument and see the pictures of the pair arguing in this week’s Woman’s Day on sale January 23, 2012.

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Ajay Rochester’s son’s shock: Mummy, that fat woman is you!

Ajay Rochester's son's shock: Mummy, that fat woman is you!

Ajay Rochester describes in her own words her humiliation when she finally became a cover girl – as the “worst bikini body ever”.

With two weeks off over Christmas [a break from shooting Channel 9’s new weight loss series Excess Baggage], I flew back to LA to spend it with my darling boy Kai. Home and with a Christmas meal to cook the very next day, we raced off to the supermarket to grab some groceries.

“Standing at the checkout, my eyes skim across a magazine I never look twice at, the National Enquirer, and I think, ‘Oh, wow, some random celebrity has the very same bikini as me’. I can’t see the face of the alleged celebrity because there is a sticker across it, claiming that $2 and a turn of a page guarantees a peepshow of the best and worst beach bodies of all time. “It takes me a few seconds. I’m not sure how long, but time stood still, crickets chirped, while clocks probably ticked loudly… and then it hit me! “I looked a little closer at the fat spilling out over the bikini bottom and marvelled at the back fat spilling out of the top like a nicely rolled roast.

“Oh my god! That fat celebrity with the worst beach body of all time was ME! ME! Oh my god! I am on the cover of a magazine, the fattest I have been in years! Oh dear! Oh dear! Oh dear! “I look around, forgetting that I am in America and no-one knows who I am (it’s only in Australia that people scrutinise my every move), and I grab the magazine, dying a thousand deaths.

“I show Kai, pointing and – unlike me – unable to find the words to describe the horror I am experiencing, but he sympathises immediately. “‘Oh my gosh,’ he says. ‘Why do they do that? That poor person. That’s just rude. Imagine how they feel…’ “At first I think he is joking. Then I realise, bless him, he doesn’t realise it is me – his mother – on the cover of a magazine I hope none of his friends ever get their hands on.

Read more about Ajay’s shock and see her bikini body pictures in this week’s Woman’s Day on sale January 23, 2012.

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Rebecca Gibney’s sexy slim down

Rebecca Gibney’s sexy slimdown

Wearing a little black dress, Rebecca Gibney is showing off her sexy new figure!

Rebecca Gibney’s smile says it all. Striking a pose in a skin-tight little black dress, she couldn’t be prouder of her transformation. Having stacked on some 13.5kg for her first major feature film role in PJ Hogan’s Mental, the mum of one has spent the past four months working to get back into swimsuit shape.

Rebecca’s weight-loss secret? A combination of a wholefood diet, cardio workouts and yoga, under the direction of a personal trainer. And it has given the 47-year-old her best body ever. Rebecca, who will return to our screens in the new season of Packed To The Rafters, had to work hard to lose the weight she gained last year.

Her trainer, Brad Spark from Active Lifestyles in Sydney’s north, said it wasn’t enough for Rebecca to change her eating habits to lose weight after filming wrapped, rather, she had to overhaul her entire lifestyle.

“Her amazing transformation was largely due to her commitment to my plan. A plan is only as successful as the client’s commitment,” Brad says. “I planned Rebecca’s diet with careful consideration to her training and lifestyle.” Central to Rebecca’s weight loss was her embracing a no-CRAP diet, which refers to cutting out caffeine, refined sugar, alcohol and processed food.

Read more about Rebecca Gibney’s slim down in and see her before pictures in this week’s Woman’s Day on sale January 23, 2012.

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Kate’s happy news!

Kate's happy news!

William thought it was just a quiet walk on the beach but it seems he also got some good news from his wife.

It was a chilly afternoon on a remote beach in Wales but the Duchess of Cambridge was snug and warm, cuddling up to Prince William, while their new puppy played at their feet.

Putting her arm around William’s shoulder, Kate reached up to whisper in his ear. His face lit up in shock, then he smiled broadly. These world exclusive pictures not only show that the couple are more in love than ever but have sparked a frenzy of speculation about the wonderful secret they share.

Her intimate confession remains between the two of them, but the smart money is on Kate agreeing it’s time for a baby – particularly with William about to be deployed to the Falklands, and then to the North Sea on treacherous Air Force operations. London bookmakers William Hill are quoting odds of 1-2 ON that Kate will give birth this year, and royal commentator James Whitaker says Kate last year told her mother, Carol, and sister Pippa that she would be pregnant “in the very near future”.

Body language expert Allan Pease says there’s no doubt Kate shocks William with a “significant” confession – and that Will’s normally expressionless face lights up with joy. “Whatever is happening, it is clearly intimate and secret,” explains Allan, who says that, unlike Diana and Charles, Kate and Wills are perfectly in synch with their body language.

Read more about Kate and William’s happy news PLUS see the WORLD EXCLUSIVE pictures of the pair’s beach walk in this week’s Woman’s Day on sale January 23, 2012.

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Lose 5 kilos in 2 weeks: Day 14

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Want to know how to lose five kilos in two weeks? Elle Macpherson’s trainer James Duigan shows you how!

When it comes to losing weight, just like everything in life we need to a little bit of inspiration to achieve our goals. Elle Macpherson’s trainer James Duigan has come on board for the Woman’s Day diet in 2012 and shares with us all of his top tips. “I am thrilled to contribute to The Woman’s Day Diet 2012,” he said.

“You’ll find all your favourite WD diet recipes – kJ-crunched, cooked and tested in the WD test kitchen – plus a few of my own recipes, diet tips and the workouts that get my celebrity clients in tip-top shape.”

Make sure you follow the rules, work out plan, eat two snacks from the snack list per day and stick to the portion sizes.

Top tip: Please note foods in bold are free kj and you can eat as much as you like.

  • You should lose 1-2kgs a week (up to 5kgs for heavier women), depending on your starting weight. The total daily kJ count is 5500-7000kJ. This compares to the average of 8000-9000kJ for a 70kg Australian woman;

  • Eat lots of green vegetables or a fibre supplement. Fibre helps reduce “bat wings” and “bingo arms” by eliminating toxins;

  • Limit alcohol to four standard drinks a week. A 400kJ glass of wine replaces one snack.

  • Your body converts wheat to sugar faster than any other grain. So try and avoid bread and pasta, if you can.

  • All breakfasts on the diet can be swapped with other breakfasts, lunches with lunches and dinners with dinners.

  • One coffee per day is allowed. After that, drink green tea.

  • All beakfasts on the four week diet are interchangeable with other breakfasts, lunches with lunches and dinners with dinners;

  • Studies show that low-fat yoghurts, for instance, are loaded with sugar and sodium to make up for the blandness of having no fat. So, eat real butter, yoghurt and milk and cheese. Keep the doses small, though, says James.Snack ListEach day choose from any two of the following:1 apple and 1 matchbox-sized serve full-fat cheese (700kJ);

  • Vegetable sticks and ¼ cup hummus (600kJ);

  • 1 piece of fruit and a handful of nuts (400kJ);

  • 100g natural yoghurt with berries, cinnamon and almonds (400kJ)

  • 1 small latte (400kJ)

  • 2 Corn Thins with 1 teaspoon no added sugar peanut butter (400kJ)

  • Make a yoghurt paddle pop (with fruit and nuts) (450kJ)

  • Frozen grapes and bananas (480kj)

  • Fruit smoothie with added fibre or bran (400kJ)

  • 4 squares dark chocolate (400kJ)

  • Green smoothie (blend up celery, cucumber, lime, ginger, mint) (negligible).

  • 1 apple and 1 matchbox-sized serve full-fat cheese (700kJ);

  • Vegetable sticks and ¼ cup hummus (600kJ);

  • 1 piece of fruit and a handful of nuts (400kJ);

  • 100g natural yoghurt with berries, cinnamon and almonds (400kJ)

  • 1 small latte (400kJ)

  • 2 Corn Thins with 1 teaspoon no added sugar peanut butter (400kJ)

  • Make a yoghurt paddle pop (with fruit and nuts) (450kJ)

  • Frozen grapes and bananas (480kj)

  • Fruit smoothie with added fibre or bran (400kJ)

  • 4 squares dark chocolate (400kJ)

  • Green smoothie (blend up celery, cucumber, lime, ginger, mint) (negligible).

  • 1 serve of rice or pasta = a fist

  • 1 piece of meat, fish or chicken = the size and width of a deck of cards

  • 1 serve of cheese = one slice, or 4 small cubes that could fit in a matchbox

  • 1 serve of butter = your fingertip

For more great diet and work out tips, plus the full diet plan, see Woman’s Day on sale January 9, 2012.

DISCLAIMER: Please do not embark on a vigorous exercise program without speaking to your doctor first. This advice is general only and does not replace the advice of your doctor or exercise physiologist.

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Lose 5 kilos in 2 weeks: Day 13

Want to know how to lose five kilos in two weeks? Elle Macpherson’s trainer James Duigan shows you how!

When it comes to losing weight, just like everything in life we need to a little bit of inspiration to achieve our goals. Elle Macpherson’s trainer James Duigan has come on board for the Woman’s Day diet in 2012 and shares with us all of his top tips. “I am thrilled to contribute to The Woman’s Day Diet 2012,” he said.

“You’ll find all your favourite WD diet recipes – kJ-crunched, cooked and tested in the WD test kitchen – plus a few of my own recipes, diet tips and the workouts that get my celebrity clients in tip-top shape.”

Make sure you follow the rules, work out plan, eat two snacks from the snack list per day and stick to the portion sizes.

Top tip: Please note foods in bold are free kj and you can eat as much as you like.

  • You should lose 1-2kgs a week (up to 5kgs for heavier women), depending on your starting weight. The total daily kJ count is 5500-7000kJ. This compares to the average of 8000-9000kJ for a 70kg Australian woman;

  • Eat lots of green vegetables or a fibre supplement. Fibre helps reduce “bat wings” and “bingo arms” by eliminating toxins;

  • Limit alcohol to four standard drinks a week. A 400kJ glass of wine replaces one snack.

  • Your body converts wheat to sugar faster than any other grain. So try and avoid bread and pasta, if you can.

  • All breakfasts on the diet can be swapped with other breakfasts, lunches with lunches and dinners with dinners.

  • One coffee per day is allowed. After that, drink green tea.

  • All beakfasts on the four week diet are interchangeable with other breakfasts, lunches with lunches and dinners with dinners;

  • Studies show that low-fat yoghurts, for instance, are loaded with sugar and sodium to make up for the blandness of having no fat. So, eat real butter, yoghurt and milk and cheese. Keep the doses small, though, says James.Snack ListEach day choose from any two of the following:1 apple and 1 matchbox-sized serve full-fat cheese (700kJ);

  • Vegetable sticks and ¼ cup hummus (600kJ);

  • 1 piece of fruit and a handful of nuts (400kJ);

  • 100g natural yoghurt with berries, cinnamon and almonds (400kJ)

  • 1 small latte (400kJ)

  • 2 Corn Thins with 1 teaspoon no added sugar peanut butter (400kJ)

  • Make a yoghurt paddle pop (with fruit and nuts) (450kJ)

  • Frozen grapes and bananas (480kj)

  • Fruit smoothie with added fibre or bran (400kJ)

  • 4 squares dark chocolate (400kJ)

  • Green smoothie (blend up celery, cucumber, lime, ginger, mint) (negligible).

  • 1 apple and 1 matchbox-sized serve full-fat cheese (700kJ);

  • Vegetable sticks and ¼ cup hummus (600kJ);

  • 1 piece of fruit and a handful of nuts (400kJ);

  • 100g natural yoghurt with berries, cinnamon and almonds (400kJ)

  • 1 small latte (400kJ)

  • 2 Corn Thins with 1 teaspoon no added sugar peanut butter (400kJ)

  • Make a yoghurt paddle pop (with fruit and nuts) (450kJ)

  • Frozen grapes and bananas (480kj)

  • Fruit smoothie with added fibre or bran (400kJ)

  • 4 squares dark chocolate (400kJ)

  • Green smoothie (blend up celery, cucumber, lime, ginger, mint) (negligible).

  • 1 serve of rice or pasta = a fist

  • 1 piece of meat, fish or chicken = the size and width of a deck of cards

  • 1 serve of cheese = one slice, or 4 small cubes that could fit in a matchbox

  • 1 serve of butter = your fingertip

For more great diet and work out tips, plus the full diet plan, see Woman’s Day on sale January 9, 2012.

DISCLAIMER: Please do not embark on a vigorous exercise program without speaking to your doctor first. This advice is general only and does not replace the advice of your doctor or exercise physiologist.

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