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Helen Mirren: You don’t need sex in marriage

Helen Mirren: You don't need sex in marriage

Let’s about sex, shall we? Not how much of it we’re all supposed to be having, but about whether it’s possible to be married and to be in love, and yet not be having any sex at all.

Helen Mirren — the British-born actress who also happens, at the age of 67, to be a total fox — thinks it must be.

Related: Helen Mirren – Nothing like a Dame

“I don’t know why people have this idea that all marriages have to have sex because really, they don’t,” she says, over a civilised cup of tea at the Dorchester Hotel in London’s Mayfair, one foggy afternoon.

“There are other types of glue that hold people together.”

To be clear, Helen is speaking not of her own 15-year marriage to the American director Taylor Hackford (among other films, he made An Officer and a Gentleman), but of the 54-year union between the so-called “master of suspense” Alfred Hitchcock and his wife, Alma.

Helen plays Alma in the upcoming film, Hitchcock. It’s set in 1959, the year that Alfred made Psycho and although this isn’t the main point of the movie, there are signs that the couple are no longer intimate (they sleep side-by-side, but in single beds, for example.)

This shouldn’t be taken to mean that the relationship is dead; on the contrary, Hitchcock celebrates what might be called real love — the kind that endures over decades.

Yet there are signs that Alma, who is getting on for 60 years of age in the film, still wants Alfred to desire her, as much as to admire her.

That is something that Helen completely understands. “Of course, she’s his wife, she wants him to think, or to say, ‘Oh, look at you, you look so chic!’,” she says.

“It’s not, ‘get your knickers down, darling’, but all women — or many women — want to be told they look nice.”

Just for the record, hardly anyone ever says that Helen Mirren looks “nice”. No, to her great amusement, they’re more likely to describe her as “red-hot” or as a “sex-pot”, or to quote some of the headlines that have been used in recent years, she’s “Still Sexy — and over Sixty!”

She’s only got herself to blame, of course. Just three years ago, at the age of 64, Helen startled paparazzi by emerging from the Italian sea wearing nothing but a red bikini. Two years ago, she posed naked but for a strand of pearls for New York magazine. She also stripped for Esquire in the lead-up to the London Olympics, draped only in the Union Jack.

In pictures: Meryl Streep – Sexy at 60

She’s tickled by the idea that she’s somehow doing something remarkable by being an object of sexual fascination well into her seventh decade, saying, “I do feel insecure sometimes, just like everybody else. But, honestly, it’s ridiculous … we’re all worrying about [how we look] and it really is a bloody waste of time”.

Read more of this story in the January issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly.

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Symantha Perkins: My split from Kieren

Symantha Perkins: My split from Kieren

Symantha Perkins. Photography by Juli Balla. Styling by Mattie Cronan.

Eight months after her split from Olympic champion Kieren (who has revealed the new woman in his life), Symantha Perkins tells Bryce Corbett what it was really like to be married to swimming’s golden boy.

It’s a scene that is part of the nation’s sporting history. After cruising coolly to victory in the 1500 metres freestyle final at the Atlanta Olympics in 1996, a jubilant Kieren Perkins leaps from the pool, clambers into the bleachers and kisses his girlfriend, Symantha Liu.

Related: Charlotte Dawson – I gave up my baby for my husband

It was a romantic gesture befitting the carefully cultivated image of a man who remains to this day Australian swimming’s “golden boy”.

It was, many of us believed — or wanted to believe — the beginning of a fairytale for the young couple, who would soon thereafter go on to marry and have three children.

Yet, as Symantha Perkins tells it now, sitting in a Brisbane hotel lobby bar and quietly reflecting on the recent demise of her 15-year marriage to the Olympic champion, the reality of being the wife of Kieren Perkins fell way short of whatever fantasy we may have imagined.

“Fairytales are hard to live up to,” she tells the January issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly. “That’s the thing about them. They are, by definition, a fiction.”

Eight months ago, the Perkins marriage came to an end when Kieren decided he wanted out. In a statement to the media at the time, the former swimmer turned bank executive accounted for the break-up, saying, “It’s an awful thing, but you have got to take yourself out of it and recognise that our three children are all that matters, and make them as comfortable as possible and make sure we get through this as quickly as we can.”

At the time, it was a sad case of yet another marriage foundering — a tale familiar to many Australian families.

In this instance, the main players were Kieren, Symantha and their three children, Georgia, 15, Harry, 13, and Charlotte, six.

Yet, six months later, at a sports award ceremony in Melbourne, Kieren introduced a sixth character into the narrative when he posed for photos with a new love-interest on his arm — Karen Davis, a colleague with whom he works at the National Australia Bank in Brisbane.

As Symantha puts it now (and in what will be the understatement of our interview), “It’s been a pretty horrible eight months.”

Symantha remembers well those first, confusing weeks in April after Kieren announced his intention to quit their marriage.

“It was like being caught in a dumper wave,” the 41-year-old says now. “My whole world had been turned upside-down and I felt like I was battling to come up for air. It was a dark time and I have been through a lot of tissue boxes.

“The hardest thing for me, at first, was the sense of failure. And that was a hurdle that took a while to get over. And I am still not over it. It’s something I deal with every day. I spent two decades with the same person and that’s not something you get over in a few days or a few months.”

Related: Aussie swimmers ‘cheered when Magnussen lost’

So does she feel any resentment?

“No, I don’t see it that way because of my kids. I mean, I worked so hard to have those kids — I literally nearly died having them — I just can’t see it that way. He still gave me the greatest gift that I will ever have in those children and I will always be grateful for that.

“No matter what has happened, together we created three of the most beautiful creatures on earth and we’ll always have that bond.”

Read more of this story in the January issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly.

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Archaeologists discover ‘world’s oldest bra’

Archaeologists discover world's oldest bra

The world's old bra.

Before push-up bras, camisoles and corsets there were “breastbags” but until recently not one of the medieval garments have even been recovered.

This month, archaeologists have found what they believe to be the world’s oldest bra hidden under the floorboards Austria’s Lengberg Castle.

Radiocarbon analysis shows the undergarment — made of linen decorated with lace — is around 600 years old, making it 500 years older than the previous earliest recorded brassiere.

Medieval literature contains numerous references to the aptly-named “breastbags” but archaeologists had previously been unable to find remains of the actual garment.

Seventeen linen shirts, a complete pair of men’s underwear and three other lacy bras were also discovered under the floorboards.

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Is Suri Cruise getting a house for Christmas?

Is Suri Cruise getting a house for Christmas?

It looks like it’s going to be a happy Christmas for little Suri Cruise.

While her mum Katie Holmes has reportedly splashed out more than $50,000 on presents for the six-year-old, including a $24,000 playhouse complete with running water and electricity, her dad Tom Cruise is setting the stakes even higher.

Tom is said to have bought his little princess a real house – and not just any house either. Dlisted reports that he has splashed out $13.5 million on a mansion in upstate New York, so Suri has a place to see him when he visits her. Suri currently lives in New York with Katie, while Tom is living in London due to filming commitments.

The house will also be used to stable the pony she is reportedly also getting for Christmas and all of her toys, including the $35,600 miniature race car that she got last Christmas.

This will be Suri’s first Christmas without both her parents, who separated in June.

Tom, who will have Suri over Christmas, has gone all out to make this the best holiday season ever for his daughter, telling People magazine that his older children, Bella, 20, and Connor, 17, will also be joining them in London.

“We have got lots of very special things planned [for the holidays],” he said.

“We are all going to be together. I am looking forward to it.”

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Simon Cowell is dating Carmen Electra

Simon Cowell is dating Carmen Electra

New couple alert: Simon Cowell has revealed that he is dating actress and glamour model Carmen Electra.

Talking to Ryan Seacrest on his US radio show, the 53-year-old UK The X Factor judge said he and Carmen are “people who date”, adding, “She’s adorable, isn’t she?”

Meanwhile, Carmen, 40, has told Access Hollywood that the pair got cozy when she starred as a guest judge alongside Simon on Britain’s Got Talent.

“He’s so cute. He is adorable. He’s actually a sweetheart … I really liked him. I think he’s really cool,” she said.

“Now, obviously, he’s in [Los Angeles] with X Factor and we started to hang out and we became friends … I think he’s a great guy.”

Carmen has previously dated Prince and musician Robert Patterson and was married to basketballer Dennis Rodman and Jane’s Addiction guitarist Dave Navarro.

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Pregnant Kate overcomes sickness to attend royal family lunch

Pregnant Kate attends royal family lunch

The Duchess of Cambridge arriving at the royal family pre-Christmas lunch.

She’s been sick in bed for weeks but it seems even the Duchess of Cambridge can’t get out of Christmas lunch with the in-laws.

Pregnant Kate took a two-hour break from her doctor-ordered bed rest yesterday to attend the Queen’s annual pre-Christmas lunch at Buckingham Palace.

Related: Surprise! William and Kate attend office Christmas party

She arrived without Prince William in a car driven by one of her two royal protection officers.

Kate beamed as she was driven into the gates of the palace, looking healthier than she has done in weeks.

Dressed in a burgundy dress and smart black jacket, Kate looked flawless and glowing.

The lunch — which was also attended by Prince Charles, Camilla, Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie and other members of the royal family — lasted two hours.

Afterwards, William and Kate left together, returning to their Kensington Palace home.

It is the second time Kate has attended the annual event, which the Queen hosts to celebrate Christmas with the members of her extended family who can’t be accommodated at Sandringham on December 25.

In pictures: Pregnant Kate is glorious in green at first engagement

The monarch spends every Christmas at her Norfolk estate with members of her immediate family.

Kate — who is suffering from hyperemesis gravidarum — was expected to miss the official Christmas celebrations, but now appears to be well enough to attend.

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Five New Year’s resolutions for your finances

New year, new start! Five simple resolutions for your finances

Want to manage your money better in 2013? Kick-start the new year with five simple resolutions to get your finances in shape.

1. “I will keep a spending diary”

Keeping a food diary helps dieters pin-point bad habits and trouble spots – and the same principle can be applied to money.

For two weeks, keep tabs on every cent you spend — cash, cheque, debit or credit card. If you spend it, jot it down. Having a record of your spending will highlight impulse purchases or wasteful splurges and help identify where you need to cut back.

Michelle Hutchison, spokesperson at financial comparison website RateCity.com.au, says keeping a spending diary is a great way to help you review your budget for the year ahead.

“A diary will show you exactly what you’re spending money on and if you need to adjust your budget for different expenses and for saving.”

2. “I will work towards a goal”

Set at least one long-term goal for 2013. Whether it’s simply being debt-free or saving $5000 towards your child’s tertiary education, goals are a great way to stay focused within a 12-month time-frame.

Try linking a savings account to your everyday transaction account, as an effective way of working towards a specific goal.

“Most savings accounts allow you to set up automatic savings plans where money from your transaction account will be automatically transferred to your savings account at set intervals of your choice, such as weekly or monthly”, says Hutchison.

3. “I will be organised!”

It may sound obvious, but simple measures such as keeping receipts, filing papers systematically, and using a calendar can reap significant rewards.

“Being organised will help you keep track of your expenses, minimising risk of missing bill payments and wasting money on hefty penalty fees,” Michelle says.

“Make a note in your calendar of when bills are due and when you get paid, and set up automatic debits from your transaction account to pay your bills on time. Pay bills at least a few days before they are due to allow for processing time.”

Using a calendar to keep track of when renewals are due for insurance policies or credit cards, for instance, is also a great way of reminding yourself to compare offers online, renegotiate or switch to a better deal.

4 . “I will take time to reassess”

For many of us, it’s hard enough finding time to visit a hairdresser let alone devoting hours to reading up on financial products. But according to experts, it’s well worth the effort.

“Take a look at your existing accounts’ rates and fees, but also their features and services. If you can’t find this information you can contact your provider or find the product disclosure statement online,” Hutchison suggests.

“You might be surprised to find you’re paying for a home loan with all the added extra services, like a 100 per cent offset account, but you’re just not using them.”

The same applies to credit cards. Although they may be offering great features, are they suited to your spending habits?

“Credit card offers vary significantly, so if you’re paying an annual fee for a high interest rewards card but spend less than $60,000 per year on the card, you’re probably wasting money. You could be better off with a low-rate, low-fee card instead.”

Try blocking out one hour a week for each of your accounts and policies.

5. “I will prepare for the unexpected”

No-one knows what life will bring in 2013, so be prepared for the worst by having a financial plan in place.

“A great strategy is to aim to save three months’ worth of expenses. If your household expenses total $4000 per month, you should save $12,000. If you can’t afford this, consider taking out an income protection insurance policy,” Michelle says.

Financial planners often advise hospital cover as a must-have – especially for those with larger families or big financial commitments. Medical bills can often cripple families who are not prepared for unforseen illnesses.

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Surprise! William and Kate attend office Christmas party

Surprise! William and Kate attend office Christmas party

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge earlier this year.

The Duchess of Cambridge has been too ill to attend most of her appointments in the past two weeks, but she made a special exception for her office Christmas party yesterday.

Kate and William surprised members of their household staff by attending their annual Christmas lunch at the Notting Hill branch of London restaurant chain Bumpkin.

In pictures: Pregnant Kate is glorious in green at first engagement

The party of 29, appropriately seated in the restaurant’s Queen’s Room, enjoyed a three-course set menu including free-range turkey with all the trimmings and a traditional Christmas pudding.

There were no signs of Kate’s severe morning sickness, with the Duchess eating all of her dinner, but refraining from the mulled wine the rest of the party enjoyed.

She looked radiant in a floral blue and white dress with a matching jacket.

“The Duchess of Cambridge was looking the picture of health,” a restaurant source told the UK’s Daily Mail. “William and Kate enjoyed a leisurely lunch with 27 members of their household.

“It seems even the Royals attend office Christmas parties — although it was a much more sophisticated affair, without all the usual drunken antics and revelry.”

Related: Royal prank nurse laid to rest in India

It was Kate’s second outing since she was released from hospital two weeks ago. She is believed to be recovering well from her hyperemesis gravidarum, but the condition is known to recur and she could fall ill again at any time.

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Hugh Jackman and Deborra-Lee Furness tried IVF and suffered miscarriages

Hugh Jackman has opened up for the first time about his painful road to parenthood, revealing his wife Deborra-Lee Furness' struggle to conceive via IVF, and the multiple miscarriages she suffered through.
Hugh Jackman

Hugh Jackman has opened up for the first time about his painful road to parenthood, revealing his wife Deborra-Lee Furness’ struggle to conceive via IVF, and the multiple miscarriages she suffered through.

On the publicity rounds for his new film Les Miserables, the actor was emotional on Katie Couric’s US talk show as he candidly revealed the struggles the Hollywood couple went through before adopting their two children, Oscar, 12, and Ava, seven.

“Until you go through it, you don’t understand, it’s not talked about a lot,” Hugh said.

“We did IVF and Deb had a couple of miscarriages. I’ll never forget it, the miscarriage thing … It happens to one in three pregnancies. But it’s very, very rarely talked about. It’s almost secretive, so I hope Deb doesn’t mind me bringing it up now.”

Hugh went on to say miscarrying and the heartache it caused was “a good thing to talk about”.

“It’s more common and it is tough. There’s a grieving process you have to go through,” he said.

The proud adoptive father went on to highlight that he and Deborra-Lee had always intended to adopt children, but those plans were brought forward when they were unable to conceive naturally.

“By the way to be clear, Deb and I always wanted to adopt. So that was always in our plan,” he said.

“We didn’t know where in the process that would happen but biologically obviously we tried and it was not happening for us and it is a difficult time.”

He said as soon as their son Oscar, now 12, was born, “all the heartache just melted away”.

“Parents know you can’t prepare for that moment. Nothing can prepare for you … You can’t even explain how incredible it is and that avalanche of emotion that comes and how it opens up your heart, how it frustrates you, how it angers you, how everything is just all the sudden how alive you are as a parent,” he said.

In the November issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly Hugh spoke about how becoming a father has changed him.

“It’s been one of the most amazing and difficult journeys. Parenthood is so rewarding, but sometimes so hard,” he told The Weekly.

“I don’t know how this happens, but nothing stirs your emotions more than your kids… They make you face who you really are.”

“I suppose if parenthood has taught me anything, it’s taught me humility.”

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Woman mutilated by Taliban husband gets her face rebuilt

Woman mutilated by Taliban husband gets her face rebuilt

Aesha Mohammadzai.

Aesha Mohammadzai was just a teenager when her Taliban husband sliced off her nose and ears after she tried to escape their abusive marriage. Now, three years later, she is half-way through a life-changing procedure to rebuild her face.

Aesha, now 22, is living in the US and is six months into facial reconstruction surgery.

Although she is thrilled to be on her way to a new face, Aesha’s current appearance is alarming.

Her forehead has ballooned out thanks to an inflatable silicon shell doctors have been gradually filling with liquid to grow skin for her new nose, and the hole in her face where her nose once was is now covered in drooping skin transplanted from her forearm.

Aesha will soon undergo another surgery which will see doctors take cartilage from a rib to construct a new nose.

The extra skin she is growing on her forehead will then be “flapped down” to cover the cartilage structure.

By June next year, Aesha’s transformation will be complete, and her surgeons say she should have a completely natural-looking nose, something she is thrilled about.

Aesha says the procedure has given her hope that she will be able to have a normal life.

“At the beginning, I was very scared. I was scared to look at my face in the mirror,” she told CNN.

“I was scared to think what will happen in the future to me. But now I’m not scared anymore. Now I know the meaning of life, how to live. There, I couldn’t understand how to live.”

Aesha’s story was first told by Time magazine in 2010. She featured in a shocking cover shoot for the publication, becoming a worldwide symbol of the oppression of Afghan women.

Aesha was just 12 when her father forced her to marry a Taliban soldier to settle a debt.

Her new husband tortured her, forcing to sleep in a stable with animals and beating her constantly.

Years later, she attempted to flee, but was caught and her husband hacked off her ears and nose as punishment.

She was left for dead in the mountains, but managed to get to a US medical facility, which cared for her for 10 weeks before a charity flew her to the US.

She has been taken in by a family and is now learning English with hopes of becoming a police officer.

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